for subsistence, let us do it under a clean tent, with horses that are not lame in more than three legs, ponies that have tails, and horses that haven't sore backs! Let us carve for ourselves, in the annals of cavalry, names which shall far transcend those of all that the world calls great, so that all champions and knights of old, - Skipio, Alabamacanus, the Knights of Malta, the Arabian Nights, the Spanish Cid, -shall sink into insignificance before us. Let us spur on our painted-white steeds, till we reach the summit of equine

renown."

OUR VISITOR, AND WHAT HE CAME FOR.

He came in with an interrogation-point in one eye, and a stick in one hand. One eye was covered with a handkerchief and one arm in a sling. His bearing was that of a man with a settled purpose in view.

"I want to see," said he, "the man that puts things into this paper."

We intimated that several of us earned a frugal livelihood in that way.

"Well, I want to see the man which cribs things out of the other papers. The fellow who writes mostly with shears, you understand."

We explained to him that there were seasons when the most gifted among us, driven to frenzy by the scarcity of ideas and events, and by the clamorous demands of an insatiable public, in moments of emotional insanity plunged the glittering shears into our exchanges. He went on calmly, but in a voice tremulous with suppressed feeling and indistinct through the recent loss of half a dozen or so of his front teeth,

"Just so. I presume so. I don't know much about this business; but I want to see a man, the man that printed that little piece about pouring cold water down a drunken man's spine of his back, and making him instantly sober. If you please, I want to see that man. I would like to talk with him."

Then he leaned his stick against our desk and spit on his

serviceable hand, and resumed his hold on the stick as though he were weighing it. After studying the stick a minute, he added, in a somewhat louder tone,

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Mister, I came here to see that 'ere man. him bad."

I want to see

We told him that particular man was not in. "Just so. I presume so. They told me before I come that the man I wanted to see wouldn't be anywhere. I'll wait for him. I live up north, and I walked seven miles to converse with that man. I guess I'll sit down and wait."

He sat down by the door, and reflectively pounded the floor with his stick, but his feelings would not allow him to keep still.

66 I suppose none of you didn't ever pour much cold water down any drunken man's back to make him instantly sober, perhaps?"

None of us in the office had ever tried the experiment. "Just so. I thought just as like as not you had not. Well, mister, I have. I tried it yesterday, and I have come seven miles on foot to see the man that printed that piece. It wasn't much of a piece, I don't think ; but I want to see the man that printed it, just for a few minutes. You see, John Smith, he lives next door to my house, when I'm to home, and he gets how-come-you-so every little period. Now, when he's sober, he's all right, if you keep out of his way; but when he's drunk, he goes home and breaks dishes, and tips over the stove, and throws the hardware around, and makes it inconvenient for his wife; and sometimes he

gets his gun and goes out calling on his neighbors, and it ain't pleasant.

"Not that I want to say any thing about Smith; but me and my wife don't think he ought to do so. He came home drunk yesterday, and broke all the kitchen windows out of his house, and followed his wife around with the carving knife, talking about her liver, and after a while he lay down by my fence and went to sleep. I had been reading that little piece: it wasn't much of a piece; and I thought if I could pour some water down his spine, on his back, and make him sober, it would be more comfortable for his wife and a square thing to do all around. So I poured a bucket of spring-water down John Smith's spine of his back."

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Well," said we, as our visitor paused, "did it make him sober? Our visitor took a firmer hold of his stick and replied with increased emotion, —

"Just so. I suppose it did make him as sober as a judge in less time than you could say Jack Robinson; but, mister, it made him mad. It made him the maddest man I ever see; and, mister, John Smith is a bigger man than me and stouter. Bla bless him, I never knew he was half so stout till yesterday; and he's handy with his fists too. I should suppose he's the handiest man with his fists I ever saw."

"Then he went for you, did he?" we asked innocently. "Just so. Exactly. I suppose he went for me about the best he knew; but I don't hold no grudge against John Smith! I suppose he ain't a good man to hold a grudge against, only I want to see the man that printed that piece. I want to see him bad. I feel as though it would soothe me to see that man. I want to show him how a drunken man acts when you pour water down the spine of his back. That's what I come for."

Our visitor, who had poured water down the spine of a drunken man's back, remained until about six o'clock in the evening, and then went up-street to find the man that printed that little piece. The man he is looking for started for Alaska last evening for a summer vacation, and will not be back before September, 1878.

"WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH THAT NOSE?"

SNYDER kept a beer-saloon some years ago "over the Rhine." Snyder was a ponderous Teuton of very irascible temper, "sudden and quick in quarrel,” - get mad in a minute. Nevertheless his saloon was a great resort for the boys, — partly because of the excellence of his beer, and partly because they liked to chafe "old Snyder" as they called him; for, although his bark was terrific, experience had taught them that he wouldn't bite.

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One day Snyder was missing; and it was explained by his "frau," who "" jerked the beer that day, that he had gone out fishing mit der poys." The next day one of the boys, who was particularly fond of "roasting "old Snyder, dropped in to get a glass of beer, and discovered Snyder's

nose, which was a big one at any time, swollen and blistered by the sun, until it looked like a dead-ripe tomato.

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Why, Snyder, what's the matter with your nose?" said the caller.

"I peen out fishing mit der poys," replied Snyder, laying his finger tenderly against his proboscis: "the sun it pes hot like ash der tifel, unt I purns my nose. Nice nose,

don't it?" And Snyder viewed it with a look of comical sadness in the little mirror back of his bar. It entered at once into the head of the mischievous fellow in front of the bar to play a joke upon Snyder; so he went out and collected half a dozen of his comrades, with whom he arranged that they should drop in at the saloon one after another, and ask Snyder, "What's the matter with that nose?" to see how long he would stand it. The man who put up the job went in first with a companion, and, seating themselves at a table called for beer. Snyder, brought it to them; and the new-comer exclaimed as he saw him, "Snyder, what's the matter with your nose?"

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Iyust dell your frient here I peen out fishin' mit der poys, unt the sun he purnt 'em-zwi lager- den cents- all right.' Another boy rushes in. "Halloo, boys, you're ahead of me this time s'pose I'm in, though. Here, Snyder, bring me a glass of lager and a pret (appears to catch a sudden glimpse of Snyder's nose, looks wonderingly a moment, and then bursts out laughing) —“ha! ha! ha! Why, Snyder, ha!-ha! - what's the matter with that nose?"

Snyder, of course, can't see any fun in having a burnt nose or having it laughed at; and he says, in a tone sternly emphatic,

"I've peen out fishing mit der poys, unt de sun it juse as hot like ash dar tifel, unt I purnt my nose; dat ish all right." Another tormentor comes in, and insists on "setting 'em up" for the whole house. "Snyder," says he, "fill up the boys' glasses, and take a drink yourse ho! ho! ho! ho! ha ha ha! Snyder, wha-ha! ha!-what's the matter with that nose?"

Snyder's brow darkens with wrath by this time, and his voice grows deeper and sterner,

Now,

"I peen out fishin' mit der poys on der Leedle Miami. De sun pese hot like as-vel, I purn my pugle. that is more vot I don't got to say. Vot gind o' peseness ? Dat ish all right; I purn my own nose, don't it? "`

"Burn your nose,

burn all the hair off your head, for

what I care; you needn't get mad about it.

It was evident that Snyder wouldn't stand more than one more tweak at that nose; for he was tramping about behind his bar, and growling like an exasperated old bear in his cage. Another one of his tormentors walks in. Some one sings out to him, "Have a glass of beer, Billy?'

Don't care about any beer," says Billy, "but, Snyder, you may give me one of your best ciga- Ha-a-a! ha! ha! ha! ho! ho! ho! he! he! he! ah-h-h-ha! ha! ha! ha! Why -why- Snyder who who-ha-ha! ha! what's the matter with that nose?"

-

Snyder was absolutely fearful to behold by this time; his face was purple with rage, all except his nose, which glowed like a ball of fire. Leaning his ponderous figure far over the bar, and raising his arm aloft to emphasize his words with it, he fairly roared,

"I've been out fishin' mit ter poys. The sun it pese hot like ash never vas. I purnt my nose. Now you no like dose nose, you yust take yose nose unt wr-wr-wr-wring your mean American finger mit em! That's the kind of man vot I am!'

And Snyder was right.

OUR FAT CONTRIBUTOR.

WORKERS AND THINKERS.

ON a large scale, and in work determinable by line and rule, it is indeed both possible and necessary that the thoughts of one man should be carried out by the labor of others; in this sense I have already defined the best architecture to be the expression of the mind of manhood by the hands of childhood. But on a smaller scale, and in a design which cannot be mathematically defined, one man's thoughts can never be expressed by another: and the difference between the spirit of touch of the man who is inventing and of the man who is obeying directions is often all the difference between a great and a common work of art. How wide the separation is between original and second-hand execution, I shall endeavor to show elsewhere: it is not so