An Experience in the Dark One evening as I was walking through one of the dark aisles of a country theater feeling my way for a seat, I put my hand right in the face of someone. Turning around and excusing myself I proceeded down the aisle. I had not gone far when I felt a seat which I thought to be empty. I sat down, but oh dear! what was I sitting on? That very moment a baby began to cry, and then there was a crash of glass. I jumped up, feeling embarrassed, pardoned myself again, and went to look for something to wipe the milk off the floor. 1. Do you think the writer of this short composition would have made a better effect if she had told precisely how she felt when she put her hand on that face in the dark? Or, on the other hand, do you think the story is better because it is very brief? 2. In the last sentence does the writer say just what she means? My Favorite Hobby If my favorite hobby were granted you would find me in the Northern woods of Canada where the pines firs and spruces sway to and fro in the cold night air. I can shut my and see myself clad in fur skins squatting beside a roaring fire eating a piece of fresh venison. Then afterward crawl into a fur sleeping bag and listen to the wolves call to their mates until I fall into sleep and dream of a hot sultry city. When I wake in the morning with the stars still shining to eat a slab of bacon and drink a cup of coffee I wish I could live forever in that way. We then hitch the dogs to the pack sleds and we start for Camp Daly on the river leading to Baker Lake. I hear a footstep crunching the snow, someone slaps me on the back and I very faintly catch the words it is twelve o'clock and your bed is ready for you sir. I. Is it idiomatic to speak of granting a hobby? Can you improve the expression here? 2. Do you find anything in the second sentence to indicate that the writer did not read his composition over very carefully after he had written it? 3. Answer the same question in regard to the third sentence. 4. Do you find anything in the composition to indicate that it contains a quotation? 5. How do you like the picture the writer presents? 6. Can you improve the punctuation? The Game I Like Best The game I like and enjoy most is a good well played game of base ball. The reason why I like this game is that it gives the body good exercise and keeps the mind working. For instance if the game had been hard fought and a close score one would most likely try to outwit his opponent as he is fighting for the game as if he were fighting for gold. In this game each one is responsible whether he pitches or plays first base. If a man is on third base and a good batter up the pitcher likely will walk him if he has been hitting the ball very far during the first part of the game. At this the pitcher will work hard to get rid of the man, for a hit might win the game. Do you consider the punctuation of this composition as good as it might be? What Happened over Night "Oh, don't put the window up," Ethel pleaded as we were just ready to get into bed. "It is n't at all healthy to sleep with the window down," I answered in a superior tone. So up went the window as high as I could get it. The next morning the snow was at least two inches deep on the floor. "Now see what happened just because you put the window up," said Ethel much amused. "Now wade out there and get it down before I get up." I lost my superior air as I crept out of my warm bed into the cold wet snow. The paragraphs are very short here. Of course a paragraph is not always poor because it is short, but sometimes it is. Consider whether this composition would be better or worse if the fourth paragraph contained more description of what the girls saw and felt when they awoke in the morning. A Description of a Stone Quarry This quarry is surrounded by desolate prairie lands through which a railroad runs. The opening to the very deep pit is a sloping, deeply rutted road. There may be men making holes for the dynamite or fixing fuses along the edge of the pit. Thirty-five fuses are attached to one long fuse and lighted. The blast blows off great chunks of stone which are broken into smaller pieces and put into the crusher. The limestone is in compact, irregular layers which vary greatly in size. In the quarry there may be two different kinds of stone, the stone from which lime is made and the stone from which crushed stone is made. The difference is that the stone made into lime is much whiter than the more yellow stone made into crushed stone. There is a large building to be seen near the quarry in which are a crusher and a lime smelting furnace. 1. In this short composition several topics are mentioned the surroundings of the quarry, the pit, the use of dynamite, the different kinds of stone found in the quarry, and the building. If the writer had had several lesson periods in which to write the composition, or if he had written it at his leisure at home, do you not think he could have told a great deal more about each one of these topics? Determine what he might have added. 2. The word stone is used so much in the last few lines of the composition that the repetition becomes unpleasant. Can you think of ways to avoid using the word so often? Select some subjects for composition. You have done much and thought much and felt much in your short lives, and these things would be of interest if well told. Spend a few days telling, before the class, things that have interested you, and then, for. two or three days, write some of the things you have told. WRITING A COMPOSITION FROM AN OUTLINE 226. While studying this book you have spoken and written many times, and you have learned the importance of organizing what you have to say; that is, you have learned the importance of preparing a plan, or outline. Sometimes you have been given help in making the outline, but now you must select a subject and carry all the work through to the end without any help whatever. If one of the subjects given below pleases you, use it; otherwise, choose your own subject. You will probably have to write through several English periods. My Experience in Writing and Speaking in School My Experience in the Domestic Science Room My Experience in Farming and Gardening My Experience with Cattle, Chickens, and Other Live Stock My Experience in Mending and Making Dresses My Experience in Making Butter My Experience in Tinkering about the House My Experience in Keeping House How My School Work Has Helped Me in Home Duties Factories I Have Visited Farms I Have Visited Other Schools and Ours People I Have Worked For Pets I Have Owned My Home Reading OUTLINES FROM OTHER PEOPLE'S COMPOSITIONS 227. After each of you has prepared an outline and written a composition from it, exchange papers, read them carefully, consider what topics are treated, arrange them in their proper order, and you will have made outlines of what others have written. One of your number will write on the blackboard the outline he has made of some one else's composition. Then the writer of the composition will write his own outline on the blackboard. Compare the two. You will not find them worded the same way, but if both pupils have done their work well the two outlines will be the same in substance. Treat several other pairs of outlines the same way. |