of adversity had been upon her, and now her attire was plain, simply a dress of snowy white; the best which the straitened circumstances to which she had been reduced allowed her to assume. Quite a contrast to her was her mother Carbon, whom you would have supposed to be a widow in deep mourning, or a nun who had taken the black veil, so sable were her garments, so gloomy her countenance, had not her earrings of polished jet, and a circlet of diamonds that glittered on her brow, evinced that she had not yet altogether renounced the vanities of the world. The belle of the room appeared to be Nitrous Acid, the graceful daughter of Nitrogen; airy in all her movements, and with dress of deepest crimson, that corresponded well with a lip and cheek rivalling the ruby in their redness.

Mercury was there, as lively and versatile as ever; a most restless being; now by the thermometer, noting the subterranean temperature; now by the barometer, predicting a storm in the regions overhead; now arm-in-arm with this metal, then with that; and they all, by the way, save stern old Iron, had hard work to shake him off. A strange character surely was he; a philosopher of uncommon powers of reflection; the veriest busy-body in the world; well versed in the art of healing; a practical amalgamationist; in short, a complete factotum. Potassium, though a decidedly brilliant-looking fellow, manifested too much levity in his deportment to win respect, and was pronounced by those who knew him best, to be rather soft. In gravity, Platinum, surpassed all the company; in natural brightness, Tin was outshone by few.

Among the lady metals too, there When Oxygen arrived, and his were many of bright faces and re- light, elastic tread was heard, and splendent charms; but I must pass his clear, transparent countenance on to a description of the gentle- was seen among them, a murmur men of the party. Sulphur wore a of congratulation ran round the suit of modest yellow-plush, while drawing-room, and involuntarily Phosphorus quite disconcerted all assembled arose to do him homsome of the most decorous matrons age. He was a patriarch indeed present, by making his appearance in a pair of flesh-coloured tights. Phosphuretted Hydrogen, or, as he is nicknamed "Will of the Wisp," startled me by flitting by in a robe of living flame, the dress in which the graceless youngster is said to haunt church-yards and marshy places, playing his pranks upon poor benighted travellers.

The king of the metals, Gold, was arrayed in truly gorgeous apparel; though it must be confessed there was a glitter and an air of haughtiness about him, from which you would turn with pleasure to the mild sweet face of his royal sister, Silver, who leaned upon his arm; a bright-eyed, unassuming creature, of sterling worth.

among them; literally a father to many of the younger guests. His arrival was the signal for adjournment to the banqueting - room, where of right he took his seat at the head of the table.

Touching the apartment we had now entered, I can only say that it was grand beyond description! It was lighted up with the radiance of noon-day, by an arch of flame intensely dazzling, produced by a curious apparatus which Galvanism, who excels in these matters, had contrived for the occasion, out of some materials with which his friends Zinc and Copper had furnished him. Festoons of evergreens and wreaths of roses encircled the alabaster columns, and

THE CHEMIST'S DREAM.

59

made the whole look like Fairy | vatory of Hydrocyanic Acid, the Land.

druggist.

But I must describe the table After grace had been said by and its paraphernalia. The prepa- Affinity, who is a sort of chaplain ration of the viands, I mean the to the elements, having officiated baking, boiling, roasting, stewing, at the weddings of all the married and the like-had been committed ones of the company, a vigorous to Caloric, who has had long expe- onset was made upon the good rience in that department. The things before them. At first all nobler of the metals had generously were too much engaged for converlent their costly services of plate, sation; but the dessert appearing while Carbon united with Iron to at last, as they cracked the nuts furnish the elegant steel cutlery the jest too was cracked; toast and used on the occasion. Alumina song were called for, and wit and provided the fine set of china that innocent hilarity became the order graced the table; and Silex and of the day. Even Oxygen, who had Potash, without solicitation, sent, presided with such an air of digas their joint contribution, cut-nity, relaxed from his sternness, and glass pitchers and tumblers, of superior pattern and transparency.

entertained the younger ones at the table with many a tale of his mischievous pranks in the days of old Father Chaos, when time and himself were young. Strange tales they were, too, of earthquakes with which Hydrogen and he would now and then frighten the Icthyosauri and Megatheria of the ancient world; and of conflagrations comi

As among these sons of nature there is no craving for artificial excitement, Oxygen and Hydrogen (who, by the way, have done more for the cold water societies than DELEVAN OF FATHER MATHEW), were commissioned to provide the drinkables; and what beverage they furnished may easily be con- cal, as old Vulcan's tongs and anvil, jectured. Carbon, with Oxygen and Hydrogen, found most of the vegetables; and Nitrogen, whose assistance as commissary here was indispensable, joined them in procuring the meats, under which the table groaned. No taste but would be satisfied with the variety; no appetite but would be cloyed with the profusion of good things.

kindling them before his eyes with the very bolt he was forging. "This, however," he added, with a sly glance at his staid partner Nitrogen, who sat near, was before marriage had sobered down his spirits, and tamed his impetuosity."

I have no space to chronicle more of these freaks of Oxygen's early youth, nor any of the sayings Though the liberality of the four and doings of others of the party who have been named, left but on this memorable night. Else little for their associates to contri- would I give the marvellous story bute, still some individual offerings Nickel had to relate, of a falling to the feast deserve to be noticed. out he once had with the Man in Thus the oysters, Carbonate of Lime the Moon, and of a journey he was had sent in the shell; the pyra- consequently under the necessity mids of ice-cream for the dessert of making in hot haste to the earth were provided by the daughter of for refuge. I would tell too of the Chlorine and Sodium, who was out drolleries of Nitrous Oxide, that several hours in the snow, engaged funniest, queerest, craziest of in freezing them; and the almonds youngsters; and how Phosphorus and peaches came from the conser-made a flaming speech, and Potash

a caustic one; and how Mercury with indignation; Arsenic and Antiproposed as a toast, "The medical mony seemed to be jaundiced with profession: to whom we say, 'Use rage; Ammonia, to whom his preus, but do not abuse us.' I must sence recalled very unpleasant asspeak however of a curious little by-sociations, in trying to avoid him, scene I chanced to witness; it was precipitated several Metallic Oxides a flirtation that Platinum was car- to the floor; while Chlorine, with rying on with Hydrogen, whom, more self-command than the rest, much to my surprise, I found seated advanced with a firm step to expel among the Metals, and quite at the intruder, looking as if she were home among them, too. There was about to annihilate him on the spot. quite a contrast between Platinum, gray, heavy, and dull as he was, and the light and buoyant creature by his side: but there soon seemed to be evidence of some mutual attraction. Platinum grew warm in his attentions, and ere long quite a flame was kindled between them.

66

How the scene might have terminated I know not; for just at that moment a strange sound, of awful import, like the tramping of a mighty host, came to my ears: I felt sure it was an earthquake's voice," and that now my fate was sealed! My knees tottered under me; the arching grotto and the festive board gradually vanished from before my eyes, which opened upon the class, as they were leaving the laboratory of our worthy professor of chemistry, where it seemed, much to my confusion, I had fallen asleep during lecture, and

So passed the evening: all went 'merry as a marriage-bell," with nothing to mar the good humour that prevailed; till, in an evil hour, Sulphuretted Hydrogen, a disagreeable fellow, against whose appearance at the banquet most of the company had protested, entered the apartment with a very offensive air. In an instant the whole family of Metals, to whom he was particularly obnoxious, changed colour; Lead fairly grew black in the face an American publication.)

"Dreamed a dream in the midst of my slumbers."

-(Dr. House, in Knickerbocker,

FRANCIS JEFFREY-HIS MARRIAGE.

61

This pleased his majesty so well, | tained avowed and important orithat he broke into a laughter, and ginal works. He has raised a great said, "By my soul, so thou shalt for monument, but it is one on which Thou art a bitter, but thou his own name is too faintly enart a witty knave."-(Howel's Let- graved.-(Life by Lord Cockburn.) ters, 1621.)

me.

FRANCIS JEFFREY-ULTIMUS

ROMANORUM.

JEFFREY'S MARRIAGE.

The marriage took place on November 1, 1801. It had all the reHe prepared himself for what he commendations of poverty. His did by judicious early industry. He father, who was in humble circumthen chose the most difficult spheres stances, assisted them a very little; in which talent can be exerted, and but Miss Wilson had no fortune, excelled in them all; rising from and Jeffrey had told his brother, obscurity and dependence to afflu- only six months before, that "my ence and renown. His splendour profession has never yet brought me as an advocate was exceeded by his £100 a-year, yet have I determined eminence as a judge. He was the to venture upon this new state. It founder of a new system of criti- shows a reliance on Providence cism, and this a higher one than scarcely to be equalled in this dehad ever existed. As an editor, generate age, and indicates such and as a writer, he did as much to resolutions of economy as would terimprove his country and the world rify any less magnanimous advenas can almost ever be done, by dis- turer." His brother having asked cussion, by a single man. He was him to describe his wife, he did so, the last of four pre-eminent Scotch- as I think, who came to know her men, who, living in their own well, with great accuracy. "You country, raised its character and ask me to describe my Catherine extended its reputation during the to you; but I have no talent for period of his career. The other description, and put but little faith three were Dugald Stewart, Walter in full-drawn characters; besides, Scott, and Thomas Chalmers; each the original is now so much a part of whom, in literature, philosophy, of myself, that it would not be deor policy, caused great changes; and cent to enlarge very much, either each left upon his age the impres- upon her excellencies or her impersion of the mind that produced fections. It is proper, however, to them. Jeffrey, though surpassed tell you, in sober earnest, that she in genius certainly by Scott, and is not a showy or remarkable girl, perhaps by Chalmers, was inferior either in person or character. She to none of them in public usefulness, has good sense, good manners, good or in the beauty of the means by temper, and good hands, and above which he achieved it, or in its pro- all, I am perfectly sure, that she bable duration. The elevation of has a good heart, and that it is mine the public mind was his peculiar without reluctance or division. glory. In one respect alone he was She soon secured the respect and unfortunate. The assaults which esteem of all his friends, and made he led against error were efforts in her house, and its society, very which the value of his personal ser- agreeable. Their first home was vices can never be duly seen. His in Buccleuch Place, one of the new position required him to dissipate, parts of the old town, not in either in detached and nameless exertions, the eighth or the ninth stories, neias much philosophy and beautiful ther of which ever existed, but in composition as would have sus- the third story, of what is now

No. 18 of the street. His domestic arrangements were set about with that honourable economy which always enabled him to practise great generosity. There is a sheet of paper containing an inventory, in his own writing, of every article of furniture that he went the length of getting, with the prices. His own study was only made comfortable at the cost of £7, 188.; the banqueting-hall rose to £13, 88., and the drawing-room actually amounted to £22, 198.-(Life by Lord Cockburn.)

MOORE'S DUEL WITH JEFFREY.

Francis Jeffrey having, in 1806, attacked Thomas Moore's Odes and Epistles, for their immorality, in the Edinburgh Review, the poet resolved to challenge the critic to mortal combat. Preliminaries were accordingly arranged for a hostile meeting at Chalk Farm. Moore borrowed his pistols from the poet Spencer, who sent the Bow Street officers to prevent the two little men from killing each other. The sequel is narrated by Moore in his diary:

while Horner was looking anxiously around. It was agreed that the spot where we found them, which was screened on one side by large trees, would be as good for our purpose as any we could select; and Horner, after expressing some anxiety respecting some men whom he had seen suspiciously hovering about, but who now appeared to have departed, retired with Hume behind the trees, for the purpose of loading the pistols, leaving Jeffrey and myself together. All this had occupied but a very few minutes. We, of course, had bowed to each other at meeting; but the first words I recollect to have passed between us was Jeffrey's saying, on our being left together, 'What a beautiful morning it is!'-'Yes,' I answered with a slight smile, a 'morning made for better purposes; to which his only response was a sort of assenting sigh. As our assistants were not, any more than ourselves, very expert at warlike matters, they were rather slow in their proceedings; and as Jeffrey and I walked up and down together, we came once in sight of their operations: upon which I related to him, as rather a propos to the purpose, that Billy Egan, the Irish barrister, once said, when, as he was sauntering about in like manner while the pistols were load

"I must have slept pretty well; for Hume, I remember, had to wake me in the morning, and the chaise being in readiness, we set off for Chalk Farm. Hume had also taken the precaution of providing a sur-ing, his antagonist, a fiery little geon to be within call. On reaching the ground we found Jeffrey and his party already arrived. I say his party,' for although Horner only was with him, there were, as we afterwards found, two or three of his attached friends (and no man, I believe, could ever boast of a greater number) who, in their anxiety for his safety, had accompanied him and were hovering about the spot. And then was it that, for the first time, my excellent friend Jeffrey and I met face to face. He was standing with the bag, which contained the pistols, in his hand,

fellow called out to him angrily to keep his ground. 'Don't make yourself unaisy, my dear fellow,' said Egan, sure, isn't it bad enough to take the dose, without being by at the mixing up?' Jeffrey had scarcely time to smile at this story, when our two friends, issuing from behind the trees, placed us at our respective posts (the distance, I suppose, having been previously measured by them), and put the pistols into our hands. They then retired to a little distance; the pistols were on both sides raised; and we waited but the signal to fire,