"I shall follow my metropolitan's example, in roaring only against those enormities that are too slight and trivial for the notice or censures of our magistrates, and shall communicate my roarings to him monthly, or oftener, if occasion requires, to be inserted in your papers cum privilegio.

been violated, you might have maintained in | like him in that part of his character, as I plenty, and even luxury, of greater moment am told I already am in all parts of my perWherefore I most humbly propose to to her than to my daughter's, whose only son. sustenance it was? and must my son, void you, that (as it is impossible for this one lion of all the advantages of a generous educa- to roar, either long enough or loud enough tion, must he, I say, consider: and may your against all the things that are roar-worthy Lordship be excused from all reflection? in these realms) you would appoint him a Eternal contumely attend that guilty title sub-lion, as a Præfectus Provinciæ, in every which claims exemption from thought, and county in Great Britain; and it is my rearrogates to its wearers the prerogative of quest, that I may be instituted his underbrutes. Ever cursed be its false lustre, roarer in this university, town, and county of which could dazzle my poor daughter to her Cambridge, as my resemblance does, in undoing. Was it for this that the exalted some measure, claim that I should. merits and godlike virtues of your great ancestor were honoured with a coronet, that it might be a pander to his posterity, and con- | fer a privilege of dishonouring the innocent and defenceless? At this rate the laws of rewards should be inverted, and he who is generous and good should be made a beggar and a slave; that industry and honest diligence may keep his posterity unspotted, and preserve them from ruining virgins, and making whole families unhappy. Wretch edness has now become my everlasting portion! Your crime, my Lord, will draw perdition even upon my head. I may not sue for forgiveness of my own failings and misdeeds, for I never can forgive yours; but shall curse you with my dying breath, and at the last tremendous day shall hold forth in my arms my much-wronged child, and call aloud for vengeance on her defiler. Under these present horrors of mind I could be content to be your chief tormentor, ever paying you mock reverence, and sounding in your ears, to your unutterable loathing, the empty title which inspired you with presumption to tempt, and overawed my daughter to comply.

"I shall not omit giving informations of the improvement or decay of punning, and may chance to touch upon the rise and fall of tuckers; but I will roar aloud and spare not, to the terror of, at present, a very flourishing society of people, called Loungers, gentlemen whose observations are mostly itinerant, and who think they have already too much good sense of their own, to be in need of staying at home to read other people's.

"I have, sir, a raven that shall serve, by way of Jackall, to bring me in provisions, which I shall chew and prepare for the digestion of my principal; and I do hereby give notice to all under my jurisdiction, that whoever are willing to contribute to this good design, if they will affix their informations to the leg or neck of the aforesaid raven or jackall, they will be thankfully re"Thus have I given some vent to my sor-ceived by their (but more particularly row, nor fear I to awaken you to repentance, so that your sin may be forgiven: the divine laws have been broken, but much injury, irreparable injury, has been also done to me, and the just judge will not pardon that until I do.

"My Lord,

"Your conscience will help you to my

No. 124.] Monday, August 3.

Quid fremat in terris violentius ?—Juv

More Roarings of the Lion.

MR. GUARDIAN,-Before I proceed to make you my proposals, it will be necessary to inform you, that an uncommon ferocity in my countenance, together with the remarkable flatness of my nose, and extent of my mouth, have long since procured me the name of Lion in this our university.

"The vast emolument that, in all probability, will accrue to the public from the roarings of my new-erected likeness at Button's, hath made me desirous of being as

"Your) humble servant,

"LEO THE SECOND.' College, in Cam

From My Den, at
bridge, July 29.

N. B. The raven won't bite.

"MR. IRONSIDE,-Hearing that your unicorn is now in hand, and not questioning but his horn will prove a cornu-copia to you, I desire that, in order to introduce it, you will consider the following proposal.

"My wife and I intend a dissertation upon horns; the province she has chosen is, the planting of them, and I am to treat of their growth, improvement, &c. The work is like to swell so much upon our hands, that I am afraid we shall not be able to bear the charge of printing it without a subscription, wherefore I hope you will invite the city into it, and desire those who have any thing by them relating to that part of natural history, to communicate it to,

"Sir, your humble servant,
"HUMPHRY BINICORN."

"Sir, I humbly beg leave to drop a song

as to make him fall upon his keeper, and | give me very reproachful language; but as I have promised to restrain him from hurting any man's reputation, so my reader may be assured that I myself shall be the last man whom I will suffer him to abuse. However, that I may give general satisfaction, I have a design of converting a room m Mr. Button's house to the Lion's Library, in which I intend to deposit the several packets of letters and private intelligence which I do not communicate to the public. These manuscripts will in time be very valuable, and may afford good lights to future historians who shall give an account of the present age. In the mean while, as the lion is an animal which has a particular regard for chastity, it has been observed that mine has taken delight in roaring very vehemently against the untuckered neck, and, as far as I can find by him, is still determined to roar louder and louder, till that irregularity be thoroughly reformed.

"GOOD MR. IRONSIDE,-I must acquaint you, for your comfort, that your lion is grown a kind of bull-beggar among the women where I live. When my wife comes home late from cards, or commits any other enormity, I whisper in her ear, partly between jest and earnest, that I will tell the lion of her. Dear sir, do not let them alone till you have made them put on their tuckers again. What can be a greater sign, that they themselves are sensible they have stripped too far, than their pretending to call a bit of linen, which will hardly cover a silver groat, their modesty-piece? It is observed, that this modesty-piece still sinks lower and lower, and who knows where it will fix at last?

"You must know, sir, I am a Turkey merchant, and lived several years in a country where the women show nothing but their eyes. Upon my return to England I was almost out of countenance to see my pretty country-women laying open their charms with so much liberality, though at that time many of them were concealed under the modest shade of the tucker. I soon after married a very fine woman, who always goes in the extremity of the fashion. I was pleased to think, as every married man must, that I should make daily discoveries in the dear creature, which were unknown to the rest of the world. But since this new airy fashion is come up, every one's eye is as familiar with her as mine, for I can positively affirm, that her neck is grown eight inches within these three years. And what makes me tremble when I think of it, that pretty foot and ancle are now exposed to the sight of the whole world, which made my very heart dance within me, when I first found myself their proprietor. As in all appearance the curtain is rising, I find a parcel of rascally young fellows in the neighbourhood are in hopes to be presented with some new scene every day.

"In short, sir, the t...les are now quite turned upon me. Instead of being acquainted with her person more than other men, I have now the least share of it. When she is at home she is continually muffled up, and concealed in mobs, morning gowns, and handkerchiefs; but strips every afternoon to appear in public. For aught can find, when she has thrown aside half her clothes, she begins to think herself hal dressed. Now, sir, if I may presume to say so, you have been in the wrong, to think o reforming this fashion, by showing the immodesty of it. If you expect to make female proselytes, you must convince them, that, if they would get husbands, they must not show all before marriage. I am sure, had my wife been dressed before I married her as she is at present, she would have satisfied a good half of my curiosity. Many a man has been hindered from laying out his money on a show, by seeing the principal figures of it hung out before the door. I have often observed a curious passenger so attentive to these objects which he could see for nothing, that he took no notice of the master of the show, who was continually crying out, Pray, gentlemen, walk in.'

"I have told you at the beginning of this letter, how Mahomet's she-disciples are obliged to cover themselves; you have lately informed us, from the foreign newspapers, of the regulations which the pope is now making among the Roman ladies in this particular; and I hope our British dames, notwithstanding they have the finest skins in the world, will be content to show no more of them than what belongs to the face and to the neck properly speaking. Their being fair is no excuse for their being naked.

"You know, sir, that in the beginning of the last century there was a sect of men among us who called themselves Adamites, and appeared in public without clothes. This heresy may spring up in the other sex, if you do not put a timely stop to it, there being so many in all public places, who show so great an inclination to be Evites. "I am, sir, &c.”

No. 135.] Saturday, August 15

A GOOD Conscience is to the soul what health is to the body: it preserves a constant ease and serenity within us, and more than countervails all the calamities and afflictions which can possibly befall us. I know nothing so hard for a generous mind to get over as calumny and reproach, and cannot find any method of quieting the soul under them, besides this single one, of our being conscious to ourselves that we do not deserve them.

I have been always mightily pleased with that passage in Don Quixote, where the

fantastical knight is represented as loading | When Anaximander was told, that the very a gentleman of good sense with praises and boys laughed at his singing; Ay?' says he, eulogiums. Upon which the gentleman then I must learn to sing better.' But of makes this reflection to himself: How all the sayings of philosophers, which I have grateful is praise to human nature! I cannot gathered together for my own use on this forbear being secretly pleased with the occasion, there are none which carry in them commendations I receive, though I am sen- more candour and good sense than the two sible it is a madman that bestows them on following ones of Plato. Being told that he me.' In the same manner, though we are had many enemies who spoke ill of him, often sure that the censures which are pass-'It is no matter,' said he, 'I will live so that ed upon us are uttered by those who know none shall believe them.' Hearing, at anonothing of us, and have neither means norther time, that an intimate friend of his had abilities to form a right judgment of us, we cannot forbear being grieved at what they

say.

In order to heal this infirmity, which is natural to the best and wisest of men, I have taken a particular pleasure in observing the conduct of the old philosophers, how they bore themselves up against the malice and detraction of their enemies.

spoken detractingly of him; 'I am sure he would not do it,' says he, "if he had not some reason for it. This is the surest, as well as the noblest way, of drawing the sting out of a reproach, and the true method of preparing a man for that great and only relief against the pains of calumny, a good conscience.

I designed in this essay, to show, that there The way to silence calumny, says Bias, is is no happiness wanting to him who is posto be always exercised in such things as are sessed of this excellent frame of mind, and praise-worthy. Socrates, after having re-that no person can be miserable who is in ceived sentence, told his friends, that he had the enjoyment of it; but I find this subject always accustomed himself to regard truth so well treated in one of Dr. South's serand not censure, and that he was not trou-mons, that I shall fill this Saturday's paper bled at his condemnation, because he knew with a passage of it, which cannot but make himself free from guilt. It was in the same the man's heart burn within him, who reads spirit that he heard the accusations of his it with due attention. two great adversaries, who had uttered That admirable author, having shown the against him the most virulent reproaches. virtue of a good conscience in supporting a 'Anytus and Melitus,' says he, 'may pro-man under the greatest trials and difficulties cure sentence against me, but they cannot of life, concludes with representing its force hurt me.' This divine philosopher was so and efficacy in the hour of death, well fortified in his own innocence, that he neglected all the impotence of evil tongues which were engaged in his destruction. This was properly the support of a good conscience, that contradicted the reports which had been raised against him, and cleared him to himself.

• The third and last instance, in which, above all others, this confidence towards God does most eminently show and exert itself, is at the time of death; which surely gives the grand opportunity of trying both the strength and worth of every principle. When a man shall be just about to quit the Others of the philosophers rather chose stage of this world, to put off his mortality, to retort the injury, by a smart reply, than and to deliver up his last accounts to God; thus to disarm it with respect to themselves. at which sad time his memory shall serve They show that it stung them, though, at him for little else, but to terrify him with a the same time, they had the address to make | frightful review of his past life, and his fortheir aggressors suffer with them. Of this mer extravagances stripped of all their kind was Aristotle's reply to one who pur-pleasure, but retaining their guilt: what is sued him with long and bitter invectives. it then that can promise him a fair passage 'You,' says he, 'who are used to suffer re-into the other world, or a comfortable approaches, utter them with delight; I, who have not been used to utter them, take no pleasure in hearing them.' Diogenes was still more severe on one who spoke ill of him: Nobody will believe you when you speak ill of me, any more than they would believe me should I speak well of you.'

In these, and many other instances I could produce, the bitterness of the answer sufficiently testifies the uneasiness of mind the person was under who made it. I would rather advise my reader, if he has not in this case the secret consolation that he deserves no such reproaches as are cast upon him, to follow the advice of Epictetus. If any one speaks ill of thee, consider whether he has truth on his side; and if so, reform thyself, that his censures may not affect thee.

pearance before his dreadful Judge when he is there? not all the friends and interest, all the riches and honours under heaven, can speak so much as a word for him, or one word of comfort to him in that condition; they may possibly reproach, but they cannot relieve him.

No; at this disconsolate time, when the busy tempter shall be more than usually apt to vex and trouble him, and the pains of a dying body to hinder and discompose him, and the settlement of worldly affairs to disturb and confound him; and, in a word, all things conspire to make his sick-bed grievous and uneasy: nothing can then stand up against all these ruins, and speak life in the midst of death, but a clear conscience.

'And the testimony of that shall make

the comforts of heaven descend upon his weary head, like a refreshing dew, or shower upon a parched ground. It shall give him some lively earnests, and secret anticipations of his approaching joy. It shall bid his soul go out of the body undauntedly, and lift up its head with confidence before saints and angels. Surely the comfort, which it conveys at this season, is something bigger than the capacities of mortality, mighty and unspeakable, and not to be understood till it comes to be felt.

'And now, who would not quit all the pleasures, and trash, and trifles, which are apt to captivate the heart of man, and pursue the greatest rigours of piety, and austerities of a good life, to purchase to himself such a conscience, as, at the hour of death, when all the friendship in the world shall bid him adieu, and the whole creation turn its back upon him, shall dismiss the soul, and close his eyes with that blessed sentence, "Well done thou good and faithful › servant, enter thou into the joy of thy Lord?"

the earth this troubler of mankind.' In short, swarms of distempers are every where hovering over us; casualties, whether at home or abroad, whether we wake or sleep, sit or walk, are planted about us in ambuscade; every element, every climate, every season, all nature is full of death.

There are more casualties incident to men than women, as battles, sea-voyages, with several dangerous trades and professions, that often prove fatal to the practitioners. I have seen a treatise written by a learned physician on the distempers peculiar to those who work in stone or marble. It has been therefore observed by curious men, that, upon a strict examination, there are more males brought into the world than females. Providence, to supply this waste in the species, has made allowances for it by a suitable redundancy in the male sex. Those who have made the nicest calculations, have found, I think, that, taking one year with another, there are about twenty boys produced to nineteen girls. This observation is so well grounded, that I will at any time lay five to four, that there appear more male than female infants in every weekly bill of mortality. And what can be a more demonstrative argument for the superintendency of Providence?

Noctes atque dies patet atri janua ditis.-Virg. There are casualties incident to every SOME of our quaint moralists have pleas- particular station and way of life. A friend cd themselves with an observation, that of mine was once saying, that he fancied there is but one way of coming into the there would be something new and diverting world, but a thousand to go out of it. I have in a country bill of mortality. Upon comseen a fanciful dream written by a Spaniard, municating this hint to a gentleman who was in which he introduces the person of Death then going down to his seat, which lies at a metomorphosing himself, like another Pro- considerable distance from London, he told teus, into innumerable shapes and figures. me he would make a collection, as well as To represent the fatality of fevers and agues, he could, of the several deaths that had hapwith many other distempers and accidents pened in his county for the space of a that destroy the life of man; Death enters whole year, and send them up to me in the first of all in a body of fire, a little after he form of such a bill as I mentioned. The appears like a man of snow, then rolls about reader will here see that he has been as good the room like a cannon ball, then lies on the as his promise. To make it the more entable like a gilded pill: after this he trans-tertaining, he has set down, among the real forms himself, of a sudden, into a sword, then dwindles successively to a dagger, to a bodkin, to a crooked pin, to a needle, to a hair. The Spaniard's design, by this allegory, was to show the many assaults to which the life of man is exposed, and to let his reader see that there was scarce any thing in nature so very mean and inconsiderable, but that it was able to overcome him and lay his head in the dust. I remember Monsieur Paschal, in his reflections on Providence, has this observation upon Cromwell's death. "That usurper,' says he, 'who had destroyed the royal family in his own nation, who had made all the princes of Europe tremble, and struck a terror into Rome itself, was at last taken out of the world by a fit of the gravel. An atom, a grain of sand,' says he, 'that would have been of no significancy in any other part of the universe, being lodged in such a particular place, was an instrument of Providence to bring about the most happy revolution, and to remove from the face of

distempers, some imaginary ones, to which the country people ascribed the deaths of some of their neighbours. I shall extract out of them such only as seem almost peculiar to the country, laying aside fevers, apoplexies, small-pcx, and the like, which they have in common with towns and cities.

Of a six-bar gate, fox-hunters
Of a quick-set hedge
Two duels, viz.

First, between a frying-pan and a
pitch-fork

Second, between a joint-stool and a
brown jug
Bewitched

Of an evil tongue
Crossed in love

Broke his neck in robbing a henroost
Cut finger turned to a gangrene by an

old gentlewoman of the parish
Surfeit of curds and cream
Took cold sleeping at church

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