Fal. And I hear moreover, his-highness is fallen into this fame whorefon apoplexy.

Ch. Juft. Well, heaven mend him! I pray, let me speak with you.

Fal. To wake a wolf, is as bad as to fmell a fox. Cb. Juft. What! you are as a candle, the better part burnt out,

Fal. A waffel 2 candle, my lord; all tallow : but if I did fay of wax, my growth would approve the truth.

Ch. Juft. There is not a white hair on your face, but fhould have his effect of gravity.

Fal. His effect of gravy, gravy, gravy.

Ch. Juft. You follow the young prince up and down, like his ill angel.

Fal. Not fo, my lord; your ill angel is light; Fal. This apoplexy is, as I take it, a kind of but, I hope, he that looks upon me, will take me lethargy, an't please your lordship; a kind of without weighing and yet, in fome refpects, I fleeping in the blood, a whorefon tingling. grant, I cannot go, I cannot tell 3: Virtue is of

Ch. Juft. What tell you me of it? be it as it is. fo little regard in these cofter-monger times, that Fal. It hath its original from much grief; from true valour is turn'd bear-herd: Pregnancy is study, and perturbation of the brain: I have read made a tapfter, and hath his quick wit wafted in the caufe of his effects in Galen; it is a kind of giving reckonings: all the other gifts appertinent deafness.

Ch. Juft. I think, you are fallen into the difeafe; for you hear not what I say to you.

Fal. Very well, my lord, very well; rather, an't please you, it is the difeafe of not liftening, the malady of not marking, that I am troubled withal. Ch. Juft. To punish you by the heels, would med the attention of your ears; and I care not, if I do become your phyfician.

to man, as the malice of this age fhapes them, are not worth a gooseberry. You, that are old, conider not the capacities of us that are young; you measure the heat of our livers with the bitternefs of your galls: and we that are in the vaward of our youth, I muft confeis, are wags too.

Ch. Juft. Do you fet down your name in the ferowi of youth, that are written down old with all the characters of age? Have you not a moitt Fal. I am as poor as Job, my lord; but not fo eye? a dry hand? a yellow cheek? a white patient your lord hip may minifter the potion of beard? a decreasing leg an increafing belly? Is imprisonment to me, in respect of poverty; but not your voice broken? your wind thort? your how I thould be your patient to follow your pre-chin double your wit fingle and every part fcriptions, the wife may make fome dram of a about you blasted with antiquity? and will you fcruple, or, indeed, a fcruple itself. yet call yourself young? Fie, fie, fie, Sir

me.

2

Ch. Juft. I fent for you, when there were mat-John! ters against you for your life, to come speak with Fal. My lord, I was born about three of the clock in the afternoon, with a white head, and Fal. As I was then advised by my learned coun-fomething a round belly. For my voice,-I have fel in the laws of this land-fervice, I did not come. I loft it with hallowing and finging of anthems. To Ch. Juft. Well, the truth is, Sir John, you live approve my youth further, I will not :. the truth in great infamy. is, I am only old in judgement and understanding; Fal. He that buckles him in my belt, cannot and he that will caper with me for a thousand live in lefs.

Ch. Juft. Your means are very flender, and your wafte great.

Fal. I would it were otherwife; I would my means were greater, and my waist flenderer.

Ch. Juft. You have mis-led the youthful prince. Fal. The young prince hath mif-led me: I am the fellow with the great belly, and he my dog 1.

Ch. Juft. Well, I am loth to gall a new-heal'd wound; your day's fervice at Shrewsbury hath a little gilded over your night's exploit on Gads-hill: you may thank the unquiet time for your quiet 'er-potting that action.

Fal. My lord?

Cb. Juft. But fince all is well, keep it fo: wake not a fleeping wolf.

up at a feaft.

marks, let him lend me the money, and have at him. For the box o' the ear that the prince gave you, he gave it like a rude prince, and you took it like a fenfible lord. I have check'd him for it ; and the young lion repents: marry, not in afhes, and fack-cloth; but in new filk, and old fack.

Ch. Juft. Well, heaven fend the prince a better companion!

Fal. Heaven fend the companion a better prince! I cannot rid my hands of him.

Ch. Juft. Well, the king hath fever'd you and prince Harry : hear, you are going with lord John of Lancaster, against the archbishop, and the earl of Northumberland.

Fal. Yea; 1 thank your pretty fweet wit for it. But look you, pray, all you that kifs my lady

1 Dr. Johnson fays, he does not understand this joke; that dogs lead the blind, but why does a dog lead the fat? To which Dr. Farmer replies, "If the Fellow's great Belly prevented him from feeing his way, he would want a dog, as well as a blind man." 2 A waffel candle is a large ca. dle lighted 3 Meaning, I cannot pafs current. 4 That is, in the fe times, when the prevalence of trade has produced that meaunefs that rates the merit of every thing by money. A cofier-monget is a coftard-monger, a dealer in apples, called by that name, because they are shaped like a card, 1. e. a man's head. s Pregnancy is readiness.

o i. e. old age.

peace

Bard. The queftion then, lord Haftings, ftandeth thus ;

peace at home, that our armies join not in a hot Upon the power and puiffance of the king. day; for, by the Lord, I take but two fhirts out Haft. Our prefent mufters grow upon the file with me, and I mean not to fweat extraordinarily : To five and twenty thousand men of choice; if it be a hot day, an I brandish any thing but my And our fupplies live largely in the hope bottle, I would I might never spit white again 1. Of great Northumberland, whose bosom burns There is not a dangerous action can peep out his With an incenfed fire of injuries. head, but I am thruft upon it: Well, I cannot laft ever: But it was always yet the trick of our English nation, if they have a good thing, to make it too common. If you will needs fay, I am an old man, you should give me reft. I would to God, my name were not fo terrible to the enemy as it Bard. Ay, marry, there's the point; I were better to be eaten to death with a ruft, But if without him we be thought too feeble, than to be fcour'd to nothing with perpetual My judgement is, we should not step too far motion.

is.

Ch. Juft. Well, be honeft, be honeft; And heaven blefs your expedition!

Fal. Will your lordship lend me a thoufand

pound to furnish me forth?

Whether our present five and twenty thousand
May hold up head without Northumberland.
Haf. With him, we may.

'Till we had his affiftance by the hand:
For, in a theme fo bloody-fac'd as this,
Conjecture, expectation, and furmise
Of aids uncertain, should not be admitted.
York. 'Tis very true, lord Bardolph; for, indeed,

Ch. Juft. Not a penny, not a penny; you are It was young Hotfpur's cafe at Shrewsbury.
too impatient to bear croffes 2. Fare you well :
Commend me to my cousin Weftmoreland. [Exit.

Bard. It was, my lord; who lin'd himself with hope,

Fal. If I do, fillip me with a three-man bee-Eating the air on promise of supply, tle 3.A man can no more feparate age and co-Flattering himself with project of a power vetoufnefs, than he can part young limbs and leche-Much fmaller than the fmalleft of his thoughts: ry: but the gout galls the one, and the pox pinches And fo, with great imagination, the other; and fo both the degrees prevent 4 my curfes.-Boy 1.

Page. Sir?

Fal. What money is in my purse ?

Page. Seven groats and two-pence.

Proper to madmen, led his powers to death,
And, winking, leap'd into deftruction.

Haft. But, by your leave, it never yet did hurt,
To lay down likelihoods, and forms of hope.
Bard. Yes, in this prefent quality of war,

Fal. I can get no remedy against this confump- Indeed of inftant action: A caufe on foot tion of the purfe: borrowing only lingers and Lives fo in hope, as in an early fpring lingers it out, but the disease is incurable.-Go bear We fee the appearing buds; which, to prove fruit, this letter to my lord of Lancaster; this to the Hope gives not fo much warrant, as despair, prince; this to the earl of Weftmoreland; and this to old mistress Urfula, whom I have weekly fworn to marry fince I perceiv'd the firft white hair on my chin: About it; you know where to find me. [Exit Page.] A pox of this gout! or, a gout of this pox! for the one, or the other, playsWhat do we then, but draw anew the model the rogue with my great toe. It is no matter, if In fewer offices; or, at leaft, defift

That frofts will bite them. When we mean to build,
We first furvey the plot, then draw the model;
And when we fee the figure of the house,
Then muft we rate the coft of the erection:
Which if we find outweighs ability,

I do hait; I have the wars for my colour, and my To build at all? Much more in this great work, pention fhall feem the more reasonable: A good wit will make ufe of any thing; I will turn difcafes to commodity S.

[Exit.

The Archbishop of York's Palace.
Enter the Archbishop of ork, Lord Haflings, Thomas
Mowbray (Earl Marshal), and Lord Bardolph.
York. Thus have you heard our caufe, and know

our means;

And, my most noble friends, I pray you all,
Speak plainly your opinions of our hopes
And firit, lord marshal, what fay you to it?

Mowb. I well allow the occafion of our arms;
But gladly would be better fatisfied,

How, in our means, we fhould advance ourselves
To look with forehead bold and big enough

(Which is, almoft, to pluck a kingdom down,
And fet another up) should we furvey
The plot of fituation, and the model;
Content upon a fure foundation;
Question furveyors; know our own estate,
How able fuch a work to undergo,
To weigh against his oppofite; or elfe,
We fortify in paper, and in figures,
Ufing the names of men instead of men :
Like one, that draws the model of a house
Beyond his power to build it; who, half through,
Gives o'er, and leaves his part-created coft
A naked fubject to the weeping clouds,
And wafte for churlish winter's tyranny.
Haft. Grant, that our hopes (yet likely of fair birth
Should be ftill-born, and that we now poffefs'd
The very utmost man of expectation:

I i. e. May I never have my ftomach inflamed again with liquor; to fit white, being the confe

quence of inward heat.

a coin to called, because wielded by three men.

2 A quibh le was probably here intended on the word cross, which meant stamped with a crofs, as well as a difappointment or trouble. 3 A beetle 4. e. anticipate my curfos. 5 i. e. profit, felf-intereft.

I think,

I think, we are a body ftrong enough,
Even as we are, to equal with the king.

Bard. What is the king but five and twenty
thoufand?

Haft. To us, no more; nay, not fo much, lord
For his divifions, as the times do brawl,
Are in three heads: one power against the French,
And one against Glendower; perforce, a third
Muft take up us: fo is the unfirm king
In three divided; and his coffers found
With hollow poverty and emptiness.

[together,

Their over-greedy love hath furfeited :-
An habitation giddy and unfure
Hath he that buildeth on the vulgar heart.
[Bardolph. O thou fond many! with what loud applaufe
Didit thou beat heaven with blefiing Bolingbroke,
Before he was what thou would't have him be?
And being now trimm'd up in thine own defires,
Thou, beaftly feeder, art fo full of him,
That thou provok'it thyself to catt him up.
So, fo, thou common dog, didft thou difgorge
Thy glutton bofom of the royal Richard;
And now thou would't eat thy dead vomit up,
And howl'ft to find it. What truft is in these times?
They that, when Richard liv'd, would have him die,
Are now become enamour'd on his grave:
Thou, that threw'ft duft upon his goodly head,
When through proud London he came fighing on
After the admired heels of Bolingbroke,
Cry'st now, O earth, give us that king again,
Ind take thou this! O thoughts of men accurft!
Paft, and to come, feem beft; things prefent, worft.
Mob. Shall we go draw our numbers, and fet
on ?

York. That he should draw his feveral strengths
And come againit us in full puittance,
Need not be dreaded.

Haft. If he thould do fo,

He leaves his back unarm'd, the French and Welsh
Baying him at the heels: never fear that. [ther?
Bard. Who, is it like, fhould lead his forces hi-
Haft. The duke of Lancatter, and Westmoreland:
Against the Welth, himfelf, and Harry Monmouth:
But who is fubftituted 'gainft the French,
I have no certain notice.

York. Let us on;

Phang. It is enter'd.

II.

mafter Phang, hold him fure ;-good mafter Snare, let him not 'fcape. He comes continually to Pyccorners (faving your manhoods) to buy a faddle; and he's indited to dinner to the lubbar's 2 head in Lumbart-street, to mafter Smooth's the filkman : I pray ye, fince my exion is enter'd, and my cafe fo openly known to the world, let him be brought

Hoft. Where is your yeoman? Is it a lufty yec-in to his anfwer. A hundred mark is a long loan man will a' ftand to't?

Phang. Sirrah, where's Snare ?

Hoft. O Lord, ay; good matter Snare.
Snare. Here, here.

Phang. Snare, we must arreft fir John Falstaff. Hoft. Ay, good matter Snare; I have enter'd him and all.

Snare. It may chance coft fome of us our lives, for he will ftab.

for a poor lone woman 3 to bear: and I have borne, and borne, and borne; and have been fub'd off, and fub'd off, from this day to that day, that it is a fhame to be thought on. There is no honefty in fuch dealing; unless a woman fhould be made an afs, and a beaft, to bear every knave's

wrong.

Enter Sir John Faifaff, Bardolph, and the Page. Yonder he comes; and that arrant malmfey-nofe + Hof. Alas the day! take heed of him; he stabb'd knave, Bardolph, with him. Do your offices, do me in mine own house, and that most beaftly: he your offices, matter Phang, and matter Snare; cares not what mifchief he doth, if his weapon bedo me, do me. do me your offices. out: he will foin like any devil; he will fpare neither man, woman, nor child.

Phang. If I can clofe with him, I care not for his thruft.

Hoft. No, nor I neither; I'll be at your elbow. Phang. An I but fift him once; and he come but within my vice ;

Fal. How now? who's mare's dead? what's the matter?

Phang. Sir John, I arreft you at the fuit of mittrefs Quickly.

Fal. Away, varlets!-Draw, Bardolph; cut me off the villain's head; throw the quean in the

kennel.

Hop. Throw me in the kennel? I'll throw thee
Wilt thou? wilt thou? thou baf-

Hoft. I am undone by his going; I warrant you, he's an infinitive thing upon my score:-Good in the kennel.

1 Vice or grafp; a metaphor taken from a fmith's vice. bard's-head. 3 A lone woman is a defolate, unfriended woman. eitect of malmfey wine.

2

Perhaps a corruption of the Lib4 That is, red nofe, from the

tardly

tardly rogue !-Murder, murder! O thou honey-long they fhould call me madam? And didft thou fuckle villain; wilt thou kill God's officers, and not kifs me, and bid me fetch thee thirty fhillings ? the king's? O thou honey-feed rogue! thou art I put thee now to thy book-oath; deny it, if thou a honey-feed; a man-queller, and a woman-canft. queller.

Fal. Keep them off, Bardolph.
Phang. A refcue! a rescue!

Fal. My lord, this is a poor mad foul; and the fays, up and down the town, that her eldest fon is like you the hath been in good cafe, and, the

Hoft. Good people, bring a rescue or two.-truth is, poverty hath diftracted her. But for Thou wo't, wo't thou? thou wo't, wo't thou? [these foolish officers, I beseech you, I may have do, do, thou rogue! do, thou hemp-feed! redress against them.

Fal. Away, you fcullion! you rampallian 2! you fuftilarian 3! I'll tickle your catastrophe.

Enter the Chief Justice, attended.

Ch. Juft. What's the matter? keep the peace here, ho!

Hoft. Good my lord, be good to me! I befeech you, ftand to me!

Ch. Juft. How now, Sir John? what are you brawling here?

Doth this become your place, your time, and bufinefs?

You should have been well on your way to York.-Stand from him, fellow; Wherefore liang'it thou on him?

Hof. O my moft worshipful lord, an' please your grace, I am a poor widow of Easi-cheap, and he is arrested at my fuit.

Ch. Juft. For what fum ?

Hof. It is more than for fome, my lord; it is for all, all I have: he hath eaten me out of houfe and home; he hath put all my fubflance into that fat belly of his -but I will have fome of it out again, or I'll ride thee o'nights, like the mare.

Fal. I think, I am as like to ride the mare, if I have any vantage of ground to get up.

Ch. Fufl. How comes this, Sir John? Fie! what man of good temper would endure this tempeft of exclamation? Are you no: afham'd to enforce a poor widow to fo rough a courfe to come by her own?

Ch. Fuft. Sir John, Sir John, I am well acquainted with your manner of wrenching the true caufe the falfe way. It is not a confident brow, nor the throng of words that come with fuch more than impudent fawcinefs from you, can thrutt me from a level confideration; I know you have practis'd upon the eafy-yielding fpirit of this woman, and made her ferve your uses both in purse and perfon.

Hoft. Yes, in troth, my lord.

Ch. Juft. Pr'ythee peace.-Pay her the debt you owe her, and unpay the villainy you have done her; the one you may do with sterling money, and the other with current repentance.

Fal. My lord, I will not undergo this fneap without reply. You call honourable boldness, impudent fawcinefs: if a man will make curt'iy, and fay nothing, he is virtuous: No, my lord, my humble duty remember'd, I will not be your fuitor; I fay to you, I do defire deliverance from these officers, being upon hafty employment in the king's affairs.

Ch. Juft. You speak as having power to do wrong: but aufwer in the effect of your reputation 7, and fatisfy the poor woman. Fal. Come hither, hoftefs. Enter a Meffinger.

[Taking her fide.

Ch. Jul. Now, mafter Gower; What news?
Gover. The king, my jord, and Henry prince of
Are near at hand: the reft the paper tells. [Wales
Fal. As I am a gentleman,-
Hof. Nay, you faid so before.

Fal. What is the grofs fum that I owe thee? Heft. Marry, if thou wert an honeft man, thyfelf, and the money too. Thou didst fwear to me upon a parcel-gilt goblet 4, fitting in my Dolphin-words of it. chamber, at the round table, by a fea-coal fire, on

Fal. As I am a gentleman;-Come, no more

Hoft. By this heavenly ground I tread on, I must Wednesday in Whitfun-week, when the prince be fain to pawn both my plate, and the tapestry of broke thy head for likening his father to a finging-my dining-chambers.

:

man of Windfor; thou didit fwear to me then, as Fal. Glaffes, glattes, is the only drinking and I was wathing thy wound, to marry me, and make for thy walls,-a pretty flight drollery, or the story me my lady thy wife. Canft thou deny it? Did not of the prodigal, or the German hunting in watergoodwife Keech, the butcher's wife, come in then, work, is worth a thousand of these bed-hangings, and call me gotip Quickly? coming in to borrow and there Ay-bitten tapcftries. Let it be ten pound, a mefs of vinegar; telling us, the had a good if thou canft. Comc, if it were not for thy hudith of prawns; whereby thou didit defire to eat mours, there is not a better wench in England. fome; whereby I told thee, they were ill for a Go, wash thy face, and draw thy action: come, green wound? And didit thou not, when the was thou muit not be in this humour with me; gone down ftairs, defire me to be no more fo fami- dc'it not know me? Come, come, I know thou liarity with fuch poor people; faying, that ere waft fet on to this.

The landlady's corruption of homicidal and homicide. 2 Meaning, perhaps, you rawfing riotous ftrumpet, speaking to the hoftefs. 3 Addrelling Fimfelf to the officer, whofe weapon of detence is a cudgel (from faflis, a club), not being entitled to wear a fword. 4 A parcel-gilt goblet is a goblet only gilt over, not of folid gold. 5 Ames teems in thole days to have been the common term for a tmall proportion of any thing belonging to the kitchen. 6 Sneup fignifies check. 7 That is, in a manner fuitabl. to your character.

i. c. in water colours.

Ho

Hoft. Pray thee, Sir John, let it be but twenty remember thy name? or to know thy face tonobles; I am loth to pawn my plate, in good ear-morrow? or to take note how many pair of filk nest, la.

Fal. Let it alone; I'll make other fhift; you'll be a fool ftill.

-Hoft. Well, you fhall have it, though I pawn my gown. I hope, you'll come to fupper: You'll pay me all together?

Fal. Will I live ?-Go, with her, with her; hook on, hook on. [To the Officers. Hoft. Will you have Doll Tear-sheet meet you at fupper?

Fal. No more words; let's have her.

ftockings thou haft; viz. these, and thofe that were the peach-colour'd ones? or to bear the inventory of thy fhirts; as, one for fuperfluity, and one other for ufe-But that, the tennis-courtkeeper knows better than I ; for it is a low ebb of linen with thee, when thou keepest not racket there; as thou haft not done a great while, becaufe the rest of thy low-countries have made a fhift to eat up thy holland: and God knows, whether thofe that bawl out the ruins of thy linen, fhall inherit his kingdom: but the midwives fay, the

[Exeunt Hoflefs, Bardolph, Officers, &c. children are not in the fault; whereupon the world

Cb. Juft. I have heard better news.

Fal. What's the news, my good lord ?

Ch. Juft. Where lay the king laft night?
Gower. At Basingstoke, my lord.

encreafes, and kindreds are mightily ftrengthen'd.

Poins. How ill it follows, after you have labour'd fo hard, you should talk fo idly? Tell me, how many good young princes would do fo, their

Fal. I hope, my lord, all's well: What's the fathers being fo fick as yours at this time is ? news, my lord?

Ch. Juft. Come all his forces back?

Gower. No; fifteen hundred foot, five hundred
horfe,

Are march'd up to my lord of Lancaster,
Against Northumberland, and the archbishop.

Fal. Comes the king back from Wales, my noble lord?

Ch. Fuft. You shall have letters of me prefently: Come, go along with me, good master Gower. Fal. My lord!

Ch. Juft. What's the matter?

Fal. Mafter Gower, fhall I entreat you with me

to dinner?

P. Henry. Shall I tell thee one thing, Poins? Poins. Yes; and let it be an excellent good thing. P. Henry. It hall ferve among wits of no higher breeding than thine.

Poins. Go to; I ftand the push of your one thing that you will tell.

P. Henry. Why, I tell thee,-it is not meet that I fhould be fad, now my father is fick : albeit I could tell to thee, (as to one it pleafes me, for fault of a better, to call my friend) I could be fad, and fad indeed too.

Poins. Very hardly, upon fuch a fubject.

P. Henry. By this hand, thou think'ft me as far in the devil's book, as thou, and Falstaff, for ob

Gower. I must wait upon my good lord here: I duracy and perfiftency: Let the end try the man. thank you, good Sir John.

Ch. Juft. Sir John, you loiter here too long, being you are to take foldiers up in counties as you go. Fal. Will you fup with me, mafter Gower? Ch. Juft. What foolish matter taught you these manners, Sir John ?

Fal. Mafter Gower, if they become me not, he was a fool that taught them me.-This is the right fencing grace, my lord; tap for tap, and fo part fair. Ch. Juft. Now the Lord lighten thee! thou art a great fool.

SCEN E II.
Continues in London.

Enter Prince Henry and Poins.

[Exeunt.

But I tell thee, my heart bleeds inwardly, that my father is fo fick and keeping fuch vile company as thou art, hath in reafon taken from me all oftentation of forrow.

Poins. The reafon ?

P. Honny. What would'st thou think of me, if Ifhould weep?

Poins. I would think thee a moft princely hy pocrite.

P. Henry. It would be every man's thought : and thou art a bleffed fellow, to think as every man thinks; never a man's thought in the world keeps the road-way better than thine: every man would think me an hypocrite indeed. And what accites your moft worshipful thought to think fo Poins. Why, because you have been fo lewd, and fo much engrafted to Falstaff.

P. Henry. And to thee.

P. Henry. Truft me, I am exceeding weary. Peins. Is it come to that I had thought, wearinefs durft not have attach'd one of fo high blood. P. Henry. 'Faith, it does me; though it difco- Point. Nay, by this light, I am well spoken of, lours the complexion of my greatneis to acknow-I can hear it with my own ears: the worlt that ledge it. Doth it not fhew vilely in me, to defire they can fay of me is, that I am a fecond brother, ímall-beer?

Poins. Why, a prince should not be fo loofely ftudied, as to remember fo weak a compofition.

and that I am a proper 2 fellow of my hands; and thofe two things, I confess, I cannot help. Look, look, here comes Bardolph.

P. Henry. Belike then, my appetite was not P. Henry. And the boy that I gave Falftaf: he princely got; for, in troth, I do now remember had him from me chriftian; and fee, if the fat vilthe poor creature, fmall-beer. But, indeed, thefelain have not transform'd him ape. hunble confiderations make me out of love with my greatness. What a difgrace is it to me, tol

Enter Bardolph, and Pige,
Bard. 'Save your grace!

1 i. e. fhew. 2 A tail or proper fellow of his hands was a ftout fighting man.

I i

P. Henry.