we may yet meet any thing, (looking slyly at his top covering) I should like to try one shot with your piece, suppose we change, and, as game is shy, you shall have a go at my hat, and I one at your lily-shallow? We cannot return home sportless, my heart, and for the mere humour of the thing to ourselves, and fun to our friends, what say you, eb! shall we try it ?" With all my heart," said Jack, exchanging weapons, Paul having taken the precaution to have charged his with powder only, and, taking the first shot, poor Leashy's lily-shallow was blown to atoms. But he consoled himself with the pleasure of returning the compliment, when, to his utter confusion, the piece flashed- off in such an ineffectual way as, alas, plainly told the trick that had been played off on his devoted head' piece. Paul, foreseeing the effects of his destructive temerity, and knowing that much of his active virtue lay in his heels, seized his hat for the protection of his head, while the rest of the party sounding the view-halloo, Jack followed him hatless, till the cold wind that " sported his sconce and his temples about," warned him to desist from the chase. Paul remained incog. till the milkiness of his friend's temper returned, when he could join in the oft-repeated jest on his fine beaver.

On another rural excursion-a pic nic party-he separated from his friends, and, after

""

Twilight grey,

Had, in her sober livery, all things clad,"

He lurked about in a thicket, having stripped his coat and bound a white handkerchief round his hat, then waiting till the van of the cavalcade came up, which resembled that of Chaucer's Canterbury Pilgrims, he sprang from his covert, crossed them on their way, and vanishing in the opposite direction, excited general consternation. Muteness marked the terror that prevailed, and the metal of each steed (which also felt the panic) was put in full requisition. Paul soon returned, and had the felicity of not only witnessing but following up their precipitate flight: he kept master of his own secret, and next morning every fugitive differed in his account of the adventure, but all seemed agreed in one point-that it MUST have been something preternatural !

68

Of his theoretical humour, or jokes of another kind, a few specimens will suffice. He one day asked Mr. Currycomb, whose skull will not require hooping from abundance of brain, where Adam was when the telescope and steam-engine were invented, or where Moses was when his candle went out. Curry lookeď vacant and confounded, but could not tell. Mr. Snuffle, the Quid nunc, asked him what news, one Monday morning. He said nothing; but the French are in high dudgeon"More fools the Spaniards for not fortifying the place better," replied Souffle, with a knowing look. On another occasion, Parks, the planter, asked Paul to hold his umbrella, while he gave a direction to Chips, the carpenter, during which Paul introduced a handful of dry sawdust into it; and soon after he opened it over his head. This made Paul laugh till he cried. Parks threw back a handful of dust in his left eye: this made him cry till he laughed. These are but a few of the numerous whimsicalities and vagaries of my friend Paul Peregrine, of Peregrine Hall.

MATTHEW MELFONT, ESQ.

"Gold is but dross, and jewels pebbles are,
Without unstain'd, unquestion'd reputation."

IF too much of the clare obscuro-light and shade, —the forbidding and austere, and a want of the heroic and amiable have hitherto characterised our sketches, it is only to produce greater pleasure in our aftertask by the effect of contrast with those which have preceded. The broad lights, mellow tints, and soft shades of Mr. Melfont's portrait, which, with an open and ingenuous expression, free from that "grovelling looking downwards upon the earth," imparts delight in the same ratio that the soup-maigre aspect of Tattle, or the vulgar rubicundity of Croak or Backbite excites an opposite feeling. Mr. Melfont is not yet threescore, and the red streaks of a fine complexion are now fast intermingling with those of the

sear and yellow leaf," while his fine auburn locks are giving place to the silvery grey, which seem to indicate that more of the mockers of humanity than time have laid their withering hands upon him, though even now, he stands like winter fruit ripened when

others are shaken down. That fine full-arched brow indicates no small capacity: even, on phrenological principles, the votary would instantly exclaim, "that is an intellectual head! look at the organs of ideality and comparativeness how full they are formed!" But I require not the aid of a visionary system to ascertain the extent of Mr. Melfont's capacity. To a classical education this gentleman unites a most retentive memory and a well-stored mind, which have been highly improved by application and select society, and thus his conversation is not only instructive, but occasionally humorous and witty. He sometimes indulges his auditory, (who listen most courteously,) with some good story, which he relates with peculiar naïveté, and exhibits occasional flashes of the remains of a spirit of romance, with a talent for description, greatly enhanced by the advantage of having seen what he relates, which gives identity to the narration. He had made, in early life, the grand tour; and this was not made in vain. His lessons of the world are numerous as his days; and he looks at the vanities, the pleasures, and the turmoils of past life as the tales of other times, that point their morals to improve the heart and understanding of accountable beings. Impressed with this, I have heard him repeat, in a venerable enthusiasm, the fine philosophical lines of Dryden

"When I consider life, 'tis all a cheat,

Yet, fool'd by hope men favour the deceit,
Live on, and think to-morrow will repay:
To-morrow's falser than the former day:

Lies more; and when it says we shall be blest
With some new joy, takes off what we possest.

Strange cozenage! none would live past years again,
Yet all hope pleasure in what yet remain."

He often says he would not, from matter of choice, even had life many more allurements than it has, again embark on its voyage of perilous enterprise. He now enjoys' health, competence, and peace,' and, alive to the social obligations of nature, he distributes with cheerfulness, to those who require his aid, not like the sordid and selfish being

"Who clings to Mammon, and neglects his God." He is thus regarded, even by the mere Gossips of the Club, as the best prop of its respectability.

Biography.

ECCENTRIC CHARACTER.

There is at present living, at a place called Glenarie, six miles from Inverary, a person of the name of John Monro, at the advanced age of 95, who makes a point of walking daily, for the sake of recreation, the six miles betwixt his residence and Inverary, or to the top of Tulloch-hill, which is very steep, and distant about two miles. Should the rain pour in torrents, so much the better, and with the greater pleasure does he perambulate the summit of the hill for hours in the midst of the storm. Whether it is natural to the man, or whether it is the effect of ha bit, cannot be said; but it is well known he cannot endure to remain any length of time with his body in a dry state. During summer, and when the weather is dry, he regularly pays a visit to the river Arca, and plunges himself headlong in, with his clothes on; and should they get perfectly dry early in the day, so irksome and disagreeable does his situation become, that, like a fish out of water, he finds it necessary to repeat the luxury. He delights in rainy weather, and when the sky lowers and the clouds threaten ;" and other men seek the "bield c. ingle side," then is the time that this man of habits" chooses for enjoying his natural element in the highest perfection. He never bends his way homewards till he is completely drenched; and, on these occasions, that a drop may not be lost, his bonnet is carried in his hand, and his head left bare, to the pattering of the wind, and the incessant rain. He at present enjoys excellent health; and, notwithstanding his habits, he has been wonderfully fortunate in escaping cold, a complaint very common in this moist climate; but when he is attacked, whether in dry weather or wet weather, whether, in summer or winter, his mode is not more singular than it is specific. Instead of confining himself and indulging in the ardent sweating potions so highly extolled among the gossips of his country, he repairs to his favourite element, the pure streams of the Arca, and takes one of his usual headlong dips with his clothes on. He then walks about for a few miles, till they become dry, when the plan pursued never fails

to check the progress of his disorder. In other respects, the writer has never heard any thing singular regarding his manner or habits.

Miscellaneous,

"There is a time to laugh and a time to weep."-SOL.

ON TWO NOTORIOUS DRUNKARDS.

Two topers, Sam and Hugb,

By tippling lost their breath;
And having drank to all they knew,
At last they drunk to death.

I never dine at home," said Harry Skioner;
"True! when you dine not out, you get no dinner,"

Dr. Green's Cure for Drunkenness.—“ Whenever you feel an inclination to drink spirituous liquor (grog) drink cool fresh water. This is an effectual cure; and, in a very short time, you will make a sober man out of the greatest drunkard.-Drunkenness (the doctor says) is a disease of the stomach, and cool water is the remedy; for the goodness of Providence has placed by the side of every disease its appropriate good. Let us be thankful...

Hotch-Potch. Upon Dr. Johnson's return from his tour in Scotland, a lady, on whom he called, had got ready what is there called hotch potch for dinner. After the doctor had tasted it, she took an opportunity of asking him, "if it was good?""Very good for hogs," answered the doctor: "Then pray,” replied the lady, "let me help you to a little more."

The Grand Point.-"I wonder," said a woman of humour, "why my husband and I quarrel so often, for we agree uniformly in one grand point; he wishes to be master, and so do I."

Advice for those who find a secret burthensome.-Q. To whom may a man best commit his secrets ?-A. To a common liar-for he shall not be believed when he speaks the truth.

To demonstrate the Weight of the Atmosphere.--Place a card upon a wine-glass filled with water that is completely filled; then invert the glass, and the water will not escape, the pressure of the exterior atmosphere being sufficient to support the card in its position.

To make Fire flash from Water.-Pour a little clear water into a small glass tumbler, and put one or two pieces of phosphoret of lime into it. In a short time flashes of fire will dart from the surface of the water, and terminate in ringlets of smoke, ascending in regular succession.