ACT II.

SCENE I.

A Village; a Farm Houfe, and near it a Cottage. Enter FARMER GAMMON, and EPHRAIM SMOOTH.

GAMMON.

WELL, Mafter Ephraim, I may depend on thee, as you Quakers never break your words.

Eph. I have fpoken to Mary, and fhe, at my requeft, confenteth to take thy daughter, Jane, as her handmaid.

Gam. Very good of you.

Eph. Goodness I do like, and alfo-comely Jane (Afide.) The maiden, I will prefer for the fake of myfelf (Afide.)

Gam. I intended to make a present to the person that did me fuch a piece of service; but Ifhan't affront you with it.

Eph. I am meek and humble, and must take affronts.

Gam. Then here's a guinea, master Ephraim.

Eph.

Eph. I expected not this; but there is no harm in a guinea.

[Exit. Gam. So I fhall get my children off my hands. My fon, Sim, robbing me day and night-giving away my corn and what not among the poor; and daughter Jane, to prevent me from killing the fowls, buys eggs, and tells me they are ftill laying them; befides, when girls have nought to do, this love-mischief creeps into their heads.-Sim! (calling)

Enter SIM.

Sim. Yes, feyther.

Gam. Call your fifter.

Sim. Jane, feyther wants you.

Enter JANE, from the Houfe.

Jane. Did you call me?

Gam. I often told you both, but it's now fettled; you must go out into the world and work for your bread.

Sim. Well, feyther, whatever you think right, must be fo, and I'm content.

Jane. And I'm fure, feyther, I'm willing to do as you'd have me.

Gam. There's ingratitude! When my wife died, I brought you both up from the fhell, and now you want to fly off and forfake me.

Sim. Why, no; I'm willing to live with you all my days.

Jane. And I'm fure, feyther, if it's your defire, I'll never part from you.

Gam. What, you want to hang upon me like a couple

a couple of leeches, ay, to ftrip my branches, and leave me a withered hawthorn! See who's yon. [Exit Sim. Jane, Ephraim Smooth has hired you for Lady Amaranth.

Jane. O Lack! Then I fhall live in the great houfe.

Gam. Ay, and mayhap come in for her caft off cloaths.

Fane. But he's a quaker; and I'm fure, every Sunday for church, I drefs much finer than her ladyship.

Gam. She has fent us all presents of good books, to read a chapter in now and then. (opens a book) The Economy of human life." Ah, I like Economy-read that-when a mon's in a paffion, this may give him patience; there Jane. (gives her the book)

Jane. Thank her good ladyfhip.

Gam. My being incumber'd with you both is the cause why old Banks won't give me his fif

ter.

Jane. That's a pity. If we must have a stepmother, Madam Amelia wou'd make us a very good one. But I wonder how fhe can refufe you, feyther, for I'm fure fhe must think you a very portly man in your fcarlet veft and new fcratch. You can't think how parfonable you'd look, if you'd only fhave twice a week, and put fixpence in the poor-box on a Sunday.

[Retires reading. Gam. However, if Banks ftill refufes, I have him in my power. I'll turn them both out of their cottage yonder, and the bailiff shall provide them with a lodging.

Enter

Enter BANKS.

Well, neighbour Banks, once for all, am I to marry your fifter?

Banks. That fhe best knows.

Gam. Ay, but the fays fhe wont.

Banks. Then I dare fay the won't; for I never knew her to speak what the didn't think.

Gam. Then fhe won't have me? A fine thing this, that you and fhe, who are little better than paupers, dare be fo faucy!

Banks. Why, farmer, I confefs we're poor: but while that's the worft our enemies can fay of us, we're content.

Gam. Od, dom it! I wish I had now a good, fair occafion to quarrel with him; I'd make him content with a devil; I'd knock'en down, send him to jail and-But I'll be up with him!

Enter SIM.

Sim. Oh, feyther, here's one Mr. Lamp, a ringleader of Show folks come from Andover to act in our village. He wants a barn to play in, if you'll hire him yourn.

Gam. Surely, boy. I'll never refuse money. But, left he should engage the great room in the inn, run thou and tell him-Stop, I'll go myself A fhort cut through that garden-(going thro the Cottage garden, Banks ftops him)

Banks. Why, you, or any neighbour is welcome to walk in it, or to partake of what it produces, but making it a common thoroughfare is Gam. Here, Sim, kick open that garden gate. Banks. What?

Gam. Does the lad hear?

VOL. II.

E

Sim

Sim. Why, yes, yes.

Gam. Does the fool understand?

Sim. I'm as yet but young; but if understanding teaches me how to wrong my neighbour, may I never live to years of difcretion.

Gam. What, you cur, do you disobey your feyther? Burft open the garden gate, as I command you.

Sim. Feyther, he that made both you and the garden, commands me not to injure the unfor

tunate.

Gam. Here's an ungracious rogue! Then I muft do it myself. (advances)

Banks. (ftands before it) Hold, neighbour. Small as this fpot is, it's now my only poffeffion : and the man thall firft take my life who fets a foot in it against my will.

Gam. I'm in fuch a paffion.

Jane. (comes forward) Feyther, if you're in a paffion, read the Economy of Human Life. (offers book)

Gam. Plague of the wench! But, you huffey, I'll-and you, you unlucky bird!

[Exeunt Sim and Jane

(A Shower of Rain.) Enter ROVER hastily.

Rov. Here's a pelting fhower and no fhelter! "Poor Tom's a cold," I'm wet thro'-Oh, here's a fair promifing houfe. (going to Gammon's)

Gam. (ftops him) Hold, my lad. Can't let folks in till I know who they be. There's a public houfe not above a mile on.

Banks. Step in here, young man; my fire is fmall; but it fhall cheer you with a hearty wel

come.