wholly belongeth unto thee from beginning to end!

It was in this way I received Christ; and thy word, O Lord, assureth me it is the true way; because it giveth to thee all the glory and secureth to me all the benefit. In this way of humbly receiving, I must also walk continually. I have nothing of my own but sin. Thou hast nothing, O my Redeemer, but grace and mercy for thy people. Help me to receive out of this eternal fulness grace for grace, according to my need, that I may walk unto all well pleasing, and adorn thy doctrine in all things. I would love much, because much hath been forgiven me. I would serve heartily, because thou hast kindly done great things indeed for me. I would live holily, because it is the way to thy kingdom, and the very happiness of thy kingdom itself. Let, let me, my Saviour, be more like unto thee; for, Lord, I would be thine, and only thine, for ever!

Thus my heart often venteth its desires; though at times it is unsteady, dull, and ready to droop under the weight and grossness of a sinful body. I have no remedy for this malady but Christ, sought for in humble prayers. And when my prayers are faint and drooping, as they too frequently are, I bewail and am sick of myself; but I dare not leave him, lest a worse evil befal me. I therefore in compunction of spirit east myself down before him as low as I can,

praying for prayer, and intreating him that he would not leave me to my evil self, but enliven my soul with an answer of peace. When I can put forth this act of faith, there is often peace in the act itself, which refreshes me, and usually comfort follows upon it, or (what is better) more faith to throw all upon him, and to live more by him for

the time to come.

CHAP. III.

HOW DO I LIVE UPON CHRIST?

ALAS! my soul, in spiritual things thou too often livest upon thyself. Thou seekest in frames, in forms, in creatures, and in animal life, what is only to be found in thy Redeemer, even a right inward peace and stability of mind. Outward duties are well in their place, but they have no divine life in themselves, and of themselves can give none to thee. They are to be performed, but not trusted in; to be used with grace, but not to buy grace. They are as the scaffold. to the building, a mean for carrying on the spiritual work, but not the object or the end of the great design. In the power of Christthey are blessings; without his power, they have no life or help in them.

Many treat the ordinances as a fair substi tute for a serious and constant watchfulness, over themselves, for patient devotedness to

God, and for real holiness of heart and life, instead of the mean, and only the mean, which the Lord hath appointed, for leading up the soul to all this, as their proper and indispensible end. By such worshippers, the holy means are turned into a prophane and detestable idol (as was the case with some of old; Isaiah, lxvi. 3.) in the sight of the Lord, who doth not regard lip-service, nor any carnal or corporal attentions only, but the poor and the contrite spirit, that can tremble at, while it hears and believes, his holy word.

Remember this for thyself, O my soul. Thy first and last trust must be in Jesus. He is the way, the truth, and the life. Without him, all prayers, praises, rites, and ordinances, dwindle into carcases without a soul. Every performance will be carnal and corporal, unless the Saviour fill it with his divine Spirit: And when this comes, then there is a sweet communion of heart with Christ, and a blissful reviving of the soul. Then, behind the veil of outward ordinances, there appears a delightful view of the Lord in his goodness, beauty, grandeur, blessedness, and glory; and such a view as no carnal eye can behold, and no unrenewed mind understand or conceive.

Mere professors stick in the flesh, and mistake the worship of the body, and the motion of the lips, for the love, taste, action, and adoration of the soul. Religion

is too sublime for those, who are rather carried through a course than live in it. The road, indeed, may be a good one; but these no more travel therein, than a corpse borne along in a hearse can be said to be making a journey.

My soul, thy life and thy liveliness are all laid upin Christ, and are to be drawn from him according to thy need. Thou hast no stock left to thy own disposal. As the manna was received daily from above, so thou must live out of thyself for thy spiritual daily bread. Having pleaded thy pardon by his blood, and thy justification by his righteousness, thou must live on him for grace still to plead both, to enjoy the effect of both, to commune with him from time to time, to deny thyself, to renounce the world and the devil, to master corruptions, to be growing wiser in his word, and more rich in its experience, and, in short, to use him continually for thine all in all. The whole of this is spiritual, and therefore difficult, work; and thou art quite unable to perform it in any respect but through that strength which is made perfect in weakness. If Christ indeed be thy life; then, because he liveth, thou shalt live also.

In living thus upon Christ, thou art to live above thyself, and certainly above every thing which thou by thyself canst perform. This is the true and sublime life of the inner man, which is not corruptible, nor depend

eth for vigour upon corruptible things. It is therefore a hidden life. Ye are dead (says the apostle), and your life is hid with Christ in God. No outward or carnal eye can see it at all, except in some of its holy outward effects, the true excellence of which, at the same time, it cannot apprehend: and the spiritual understanding of other believers can only discern its inward truth and growth, but in proportion as they themselves are spiritually grown up in Christ Jesus the Lord. A mere reasoner in religion knows nothing of the matter. He, who hath never left himself, nor truly disowned his own wisdom, righteousness, and strength, hath never yet come to Christ, nor rightly believed in him..

As thou art not to live upon thyself, O my soul, so thou canst not live this true life by the aid or opinion of others. If they are instruments of good to thee, it is thy heavenly Father who employeth them for that end.. They themselves, as well as thou, must live upon him, for all their wisdom, grace, and strength, and not by the life of their own hand.. Christ is and must be as much their life, as he is thine.

Thou sometimes waxest and wanest in thy duties, as the moon in her light. At one time, thou art full of spiritual appetite and vigour; at another, in lowness and want of strength. The cause is not in the Sun of righteousness, who is always alike; but in thee, who turnest not the same aspect always.