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SCENE V.-A Room in the Garter Inn.
of our encounter, after we had embraced, kissed,
protested, and, as it were, spoke the prologue of Enter Falstaff and Bardolph.
our comedy; and at his heels a rabble of his com
panions, thither provoked and instigated by his disFal. Bardolph, I say,
temper, and forsooth, to search his house for his Bard. Here, sir.
wife's love. Fal. Go fetch me a quart of sack; put a toast
Ford. What, while you were there? in't. (Erit Bard. Have I lived to be carried in a
Fal. While I was there. basket, like a barrow of butcher's offal; and to be
Ford. And did he search for you, and could not chrown into the Thames ? Well, if I be served
a find you? such another trick, I'll have my brains ta'en out,
Fal. You shall hear. As good luck would have and butter'd, and give them to a dog for a new
it, comes in one mistress Page ; gives intelligence year's gift. The rogues slighted me into the river
of Ford's approach; and, by her invention and with as little remorse as they would have drowned
Ford's wife's distraction, they conveyed me into a a bitch's blind puppies, fifteen i'the litter: and you
buck-basket. may know by my size, that I have a kind of alacrity
Ford. A buck-basket! in sinking; if the bottom were as deep as hell, I
Fal. By the Lord, a buck-basket: rammed me in should down. I had been drowned, but that the
with foul shirts and smocks, socks, foul stockings, shore was shelvy and shallow; a death that I abhor; I.
and greasy napkins; that, master Brook, there was for the water swells a man; and what a thing
the rankest compound of villainous smell, that ever should I have been, when I had been swelled ! 1
offended nostril. should have been a mountain of mummy.
Ford. And how long lay you there?
Fal. Nay, you shall hear, master Brook, what I
have suffered to bring this woman to evil for your Bard. Here's mistress Quickly, sir, to speak with good. Being thus crammed in the basket, a couple you.
of Ford's knaves, his hinds, were called forth by Fal. Come, let me pour in some sack to the their mistress, to carry me in the name of foul Thames water; for my belly's as cold as if I had clothes to Datchet-lane: they took me on their swallowed snow-balls for pills to cool the reins. shoulders; met the jealous knave their master in Call her in.
the door ; who asked them once or twice what they Bard. Come in, woman.
had in their basket : I quaked for fear, lest the luEnter Mrs. Quickly.
natic knave would have searched it; but fate, or.
daining he should be a cuckold, held his hand. Quick. By your leave; I cry you mercy: Give Well: on went he for a search, and away went I your worship good-morrow.
for fonl clothes. But mark the sequel, master Fal. Take away these chalices : Go, brew me a Brook : I suffered the pangs of three several deaths : pottle of sack finely.
first, an intolerable fright, to be detected with a Bard. With eggs, sir ?
jealous rotten bell-wether: next, to be compassed, Fal. Simple of itself; I'll no pullet-sperm in my like a good bilbo, in the circumference of a peck, brewage.- Exit Bardolph.]-How now?
hilt to point, heel to head : and then, to be stopped Quick. Marry, sir, I come to your worship from lin, like a strong distillation, with stinking clothes mistress Ford.
that fretted in their own grease: think of that, Fal. Mistress Ford! I have had ford enough. I a man of my kidney,-think of that : that am as was thrown into the ford : I have my belly full of subject to heat, as butter ; a man of continual disford.
solution and thaw; it was a miracle, to 'scape sufQuick. Alas the day! good heart, that was not focation. And in the height of this bath, when I her fault: she does so take on with her men ; they was more than half stewed in grease, like a Dutch mistook their erection.
dish, to be thrown into the Thames, and cooled, Fal. So did I mine, to build upon a foolish wo-glowing hot, in that surge, like a horse-shoe; man's promise.
Ithink of that,-hissing hot, -think of that, master Quick. Well, she laments, sir, for it, that it Brook would yearn your heart to see it. Her husband Ford. In good sadness, sir, I am sorry that for goes this morning a birding; she desires you once my sake you have suffered all this. My suit then is more to come to her between eight and nine; I desperate; you'll undertake her no more. must carry her word quickly : she'll make you Fal. Master Brook, I will be thrown into Etna, amends, I warrant you.
as I have been into Thames, ere I will leave her Fal. Well, I will visit her : Tell her so; and bid thus. Her husband is this morning gone a birding : her think what a man is: let her consider his I have received from her another embassy of meetfrailty, and then judge of my merit.
ing; 'twixt eight and nine is the hour, Master Quick. I will tell her
I Fal. Is it? I will then address me to my apFal. Well, be gone: I will not miss her.
I pointment. Come to me at your convenient leisure, Quick. Peace be with you, sir.
[Erit. and you shall know how I speed ; and the conFal. I marvel, I hear not of master Brook ; he clusion shall be crowned with your enjoying her : sent me word to stay within: I like his money well. Adieu. You shall have her, master Brook; master O here he comes.
Brook, you shall cuckold Ford.
Erit. Enter Ford.
Ford. Hum! ha! is this a vision ? is this a
dream? do I sleep? Master Ford, awake; awake, Ford. Bless you, sir !
master Ford; there's a hole made in your best coat, Fal. Now, master Brook? you come to know master Ford. This 'tis to be married ! this 'tis to what hath passed between me and Ford's wife. have linen, and buck-baskets !--Well, I will pro.
Ford. That, indeed, sir John, is my business. claim myself what I am: I will now take the
Fal. Master Brook, I will not lie to you; I was lecher; he is at my house: he cannot 'scape me; at her house the hour she appointed me.
'tis impossible he should; he cannot creep into a Ford. And how sped you, sir?
halfpenny purse, nor into a pepper-box; but, lest Fal. Very ill-favouredly, master Brook.
the devil that guides him should aid him, I will Ford. How so, sir? Did she change her deter search impossible places. Though what I am I mination ?
cannot avoid, yet to be what I would not, shall not Fal. No, master Brook; but the peaking cor make me tame: if I have horns to make one mad, nuto her husband, master Brook, dwelling in a con- let the proterb go with me, I'll be horn mad. tinual 'larum of jealousy, comes me in the instant
nsider his inar.Her husband, Thames,
Will. Forsooth, 1 have forgot.
Eva. It is ki, kæ, kod ; if you forget your kies, SCENE 1.- The Street.
your kæs, and your cods, you must be preeches. Enter Mrs. Page, Mrs. Quickly, and William Go your ways, and play, go.
Mrs. Page. He is a better scholar than I thought Mrs. Page. Is he at master Ford's already, he was. tl ink'st thou ?
Eva. He is a good sprag memory. Farewell, Quick. Sure he is by this; or will be presently : mistress Page. but truly he is very courageous mad, about his Mrs. Page. Adieu, good sir Hugh. [Erit Sir throwing into the water. Mistress Ford desires Hugh.1 Get you home, boy.---Come, we stay you to come suddenly.
[Ereunt. Mrs. Page. I'll be with her by and by; I'll but bring my young man here to school ; Look, where SCENE II.-A Room in Ford's House. his master comes; 'tis a playing-day, I see.
Enter Falstaff and Mrs. Ford.
Fal. Mistress Ford, your sorrow hath eaten up How now, sir Hugh? no school to-day?
my sufferance: I see, you are obsequious in your Era. No; master Slender is let the boys leave to love, and I profess requital to a hair's breadth ; not play.
only, mistress Ford, in the simple office of love, Quick. Blessing of his heart !
but in all the accoutrement, complement, and cere. Mrs. Page. Sir Hugh, my husband says, my son mony of it. But are you sure of your husband profits nothing in the world at his book; I pray now? you, ask him some questions in his accidence. Mrs. Ford. He's a birding, sweet sir John.
Eva. Come hither, William ; hold up your head; Mrs. Page. [Within.] What hoa, gossip Ford ! come.
what hoa! Mrs. Page. Come on, sirrah: hold up your Mrs. Ford. Step into the chamber, sir John. head : answer your master, be not afraid.
[Erit Falstaff. Era. William, how many numbers is in nouns ? Will. Two.
Enter Mrs. Page. Quick. Truly, I thought there had been one Mrs. Page. How now, sweetheart? who's at nuinber more; because they say, od's nouns. home beside yourself?
Eva. Peace your tattlings. What is fair, Wil Mrs. Ford. Why, none but mine own people. liam?
Mrs. Page. Indeed ? Will, Pulcher.
Mrs. Ford. No, certainly ;-Speak louder. Quick. Poulcats ! there are fairer things than
(Aside. poulcats, sure.
Mrs. Page. Truly, I am so glad you have nobody Eva. You are a very simplicity 'oman; I pray here. you, peace. What is lapis, William ?
Mrs. Ford. Why? Will. A stone.
| Mrs. Page. Why, woman, your husband is in Eva. And what is a stone, William ?
his old lunes again: he so takes on yonder with Will. A pebble.
my husband; so rails against all married mankind; Eva. No, it is lapis ; I pray you remember in so curses all Eve's daughters, of what complexion your prain.
soever; and so buffets himself on the forehead. Will. Lapis.
crying Peer-out, peer-out ! that any madness, I ever Eva. That is good, William. What is he, Wil- yet beheld, seemed but tameness, civility, and liam, that does lend articles ?
patience, to this his distemper he is in now: I am Will. Articles are borrowed of the pronoun; and glad the fat knight is not here. be thus declined, Singulariter, nominativo, hic, hæc, Mrs. Ford. Why, does he talk of him? huc.
Mrs. Page. Of none but him; and swears, he Eva. Nominativo, hig, hag, hog :-pray you, was carried out, the last time he searched for him, mark: genitivo, hujus : Well, what is your accusa- in a basket: protests to my husband, he is now here; tive case ?
and hath drawn him and the rest of their company Will. Accusativo, hinc.
from their sport, to make another experiment of his Eva. I pray you, have your remembrance, child; suspicion ; but I am glad the knight is not here; Accusativo, hing, hang, hog.
now he shall see his own foolery, Quick. Hang hog is Latin for bacon, I warrant Mrs. Ford. How near is he, mistress Page ? you.
Mrs. Page. Hard by; at street end ; he will be Eva. Leave your prabbles, 'oman. What is the here anon. focative case, William ?
Mrs. Ford. I am undone !-the knight is here. Will, O vocativo, 0.
Mrs. Page. Why then you are utterly ashamed, Eva. Remember, William, focative is, caret. and he's but a dead man. What a woman are you? Quick. And that's a good root.
--Away with him, away with him ; better shame Eva. 'Oman, forbear.
than murder. Mrs. Page. Peace.
Mrs. Ford. Which way should he go? how Eva. What is your genitive case plural, William ? should I bestow him ? Shall I put him into the Will. Genitive case ?
basket again? Eva, Ay. Will. Genitive, --horum, harum, horum.
Re-enter Falstaff. Quick. 'Vengeance of Jenny's case! fie on her! Fal. No, I'll come no more i' the basket: May -never name her, child, if she be a whore.
I not go out ere he come? Eva. For shaine, 'oman.
Mrs. Page. Alas, three of master Ford's broQuick. You do ill to teach the child such words: thers watch the door with pistols, that none shall he teaches him to hick and to hack, which they'll issue out; otherwise you might slip away ere he do fast enough of themselves, and to call horum: came. But what make you here? fie upon you !
Fal. What shall I do?-I'll creep up into the Eva. 'Oman, art thou lunatics ? hast thou no chimney. understandings for thy cases, and the numbers of Mrs. Ford. There they always used to discharge the genders? Thou art as foolish christian crea- their birding pieces : Creep into the kiln-hole. tures as I would desires.
Fal. Where is it? Mrs. Page. Pr'ythee, hold thy peace.
Mrs. Ford. He will seek there, on my word. Evu. Show me now, William, some declensions (Neither press, coffer, chest, trunk, well, vault, but of your pronouns.
he hath an abstract for the remembrance of such
came. But wherwise you mistols, that,
places, and goes to them by his note: There is no Ford. Well said, brazen-face; hold it out. hiding you in the house.
Come forth, sirrah. Fal. I'll go out then.
[Pulls the clothes out of the basket. Mrs. Page. If you go out in your own semblance, Page. This passes ! you die, sir John. Unless you go out disguised, Mrs. Ford. Are you not ashamed? let the clothes Mrs. Furd. How might we disguise him?
alone. Mrs. Puge. Alas the day, I know not. There is Ford. I shall find you anon. no woman's gown big enough for him; otherwise, Eva. 'Tis unreasonable ! Will you take up your he might put on a hat, a muffler, and a kerchief, wife's clothes ? Come away. and so escape.
Ford. Empty the basket, I say. Fal. Good hearts, devise something: any extre Mrs. Ford. Why, man, why, mity, rather than a mischief.
Ford. Master Page, as I am a man, there was one Mrs. Ford. My maid's aunt, the fat woman of conveyed out of my house yesterday in this basket: Brentford, has a gown above.
Why may not he he there again? In my house I Mrs. Page. On my word, it will serve him; she's am sure he is: my intelligence is true; my jealousy as big as he is : and there's her thrum'd hat, and is reasonable: Pluck me out all the linen. her muffler too : Run up, sir John.
Mrs. Ford. If you find a man there, he shall die Mrs. Ford. Go, go, sweet sir John: mistress Page a flea's death. end I, will look some linen for your head.
| Page. Here's no man. Mrs. Page. Quick, quick; we'll come dress you shall. By my fidelity, this is not well, master straight : put on the gown the while.
Ford; this wrongs you.
[Erit Falstaff. Eva. Master Ford, you must pray, and not folMrs. Ford. I would, my husband would meet low the imaginations of your own heart: this is him in this shape : he cannot abide the old woman jealousies. of Brentford; he swears, she's a witch; forbade her | Ford, Well, he's not here I seek for. my house, and hath threatened to beat her.
Page. No, nor no where else, but in your brain. Mrs. Page. Heaven guide him to thy husband's Ford. Help to search my house this one time : if cudgel ; and the devil guide his cudgel afterwards ! I find not what I seek, show no colour for my ex. Mrs. Ford. But is my husband coming ?
tremity, let me for ever be your table-sport ; let Mrs. Page. Ay, in good sadness, is he; and he them say of me, As jealous as Ford, that searched talks of the basket too, howsoever he hath had in a hollow walnut for his wife's leman. Satisfy me telligence.
once more ; once more search with me. Mrs. Ford. We'll try that; for I'll appoint myMrs. Ford. What hoa, mistress Page ! come you, men to carry the basket again, to meet him at the and the old woman, down; my husband will come door with it, as they did last time.
into the chamber. Mrs. Page. Nay, but he'll be here presently : let's Ford. Old woman! What old woman's that? go dress him like the witch of Brentford.
Mrs. Ford. Why, it is my maill's aunt of Brent. Mrs. Ford. I'll first direct my men, what they ford. shall do with the basket. Go up, I'll bring linen Ford. A witch, a quean, an old cozening quean! for him straight.
Erit. Have I not forbid her my house? She comes of Mrs. Page. Hang him, dishonest varlet! we can. errands, does she? We are simple men; we do not misuse him enough.
not know what's brought to pass under the profesWe'll leave a proof, by that which we will do, sion of fortune-telling. She works by charms, by Wives may be merry, and yet honest too :
spells, by the figure, and such daubery as this is; We do not act, that often jest and laugh;
beyond our element: we know nothing. --Come 'Tis old but true, Still swine eat all the draff: [Exit. down, you witch, you hag you; come down I say.
| Mrs. Ford. Nay, good, sweet husband ;-good Re-enter Mrs. Ford, with two Servants.
gentlemen, let him not strike the old woman. Mrs. Ford. Go, sirs, take the basket again on
Enter Falstaff in women's clothes, led by Mrs. Page. your shoulders; your master is hard at door ; if he bid you set it down, obey him : quickly, despatch. Mrs. Page. Come, mother Prat, come, give me
[Erit. your hand. 1 Serv. Come, come, take it up.
Ford. I'll prat her :- Out of my door, you 2 Serv. Pray heaven, it be not full of the knight witch, [beats him.] you rag, you baggage, you poleagain.
cat, you ronyon ! out! out! I'll conjure you, I'll 1 Serv. I hope not; I had as lief bear so much lead. fortune-tell you.
[Erit Falstaff. Enter Ford, Page, Shallow, Caius, and Sir Hugh have
Mrs. Page. Are you not ashamed ? I think, you e, shallow, Caius, and sir nug" have killed the poor woman. Evans.
Mrs. Ford. Nay, he will do it :-'Tis a goodly Ford. Ay, but if it prove true, master Page, have credit for you. you any way then to unfool me again ?-Set down Ford. Hang her, witch! the basket, villain :-Somebody call my wife : Eva. By yea and no, I think, the 'oman is a You, youth in a basket, come out here !0, you witch indeed: I like not when a 'oman has a great panderly rascals! there's a knot, a ging, a pack, a peard; I spy a great pearl under her muffler conspiracy against me: Now shall the devil be Ford. Will you follow, gentlemen ? I beseech yoll, shamed. What! wife, I say ! come, come forth: be-follow ; see but the issue of my jealousy: if I cry nold what honest clothes you send forth to bleaching out thus upon no trail, never trust me when I open
Page. Why, this passes! Master Ford, you are again. not to go loose any longer ; you must be pinioned. Page. Let's obey his humour a little further :
Eva. Why, this is lunatics ! this is mad as a mad Come, gentlemen. dog!
[Exeunt Page, Ford, Shallow, and Evans. Shal. Indeed, master Ford, this is not well ; in- Mrs. Page. Trust me, he beat him most pitifully.
Mrs. Ford. Nay, by the mass, that he did not: Enter Mrs. Ford.
he beat him most unpitifully, methought.
Mrs. Page. I'll have the cudgel hallowed, and Ford. So say I too, sir.-Come hither, mistress hung o'er the altar; it hath done meritorious serFord; mistress Ford, the honest woman, the modestvice. ure, the virtuous creature, that hath the jealous Mrs. Ford. What think you ? May we, with the
to her husband !-I suspect without cause, warrant of womanhood, and the witness of a good mistress, do I?
conscience, pursue him with any further revenge? Mrs. Ford. Heaven be my witness, you do, if you Mrs. Page. The spirit of wantonness is, sure, suspect me in any dishonesty.
scared out of him; if the devil have him not in fee
simple, with fine and recovery, he will never, I That Falstaff at that oak shall meet with us, think, in the way of waste, attempt us again. Disguised like Herne, with huge horns on his head.
Mrs. Ford. Shall we tell our husbands how wePage. Well, let it not be doubted but he'll come. have served him?
And in this shape : When you have brought him Mrs. Page. Yes, by all means; if it be but to
thither, scrape the figures out of your husband's brains. If What shall be done with him ? what is your plot? they can find in their hearts, the poor unvirtuous Mrs. Page. That likewise have we thought upon, fat knight shall be any further afflicted, we two
and thus : will still be the ministers.
Nan Page my daughter, and my little son, Mrs. Ford. I'll warrant, they'll have him pub-And three or four more of their growth, we'll dress lickly shamed : and, methinks, there would be no Like urchins, ouphes, and fairies, green and white, period to the jest, should he not be publickly With rounds of waxen tapers on their heads, shamed.
And rattles in their hands; upon a sudden, Mrs. Pave. Come, to the forge with it then, As Falstaff, she, and I, are newly met, shape it: I would not have things cool. (Exeunt. Let them from forth a saw.pit rush at once SCENE II.-A Room in the Garter Inn.
With some diffused song; upon their sight,
We two in great amazedness will fly :
Then let them all encircle him about,
And fairy-like, to pinch the unclean knight; Bard. Sir, the Germans desire to have three of
And ask him, why, that hour of fairy revel, your horses : the duke himself will be to-morrow at
In their so sacred paths he dares to tread, court, and they are going to meet him.
In shape profane. Host. What duke should that be, comes so se
And till he tel
And till he tell the truth, cretly? I hear not of him in the court : Let me
Let the supposed fairies pinch him sound, speak with the gentlemen; they speak English?
ap And burn him with their tapers. Bard. Ay, sir; I'll call them to you.
The truth being known, Host. They shall have my horses ; but I'll make
ke We'll all present ourselves; dis-horn the spirit, them pay, I'll sauce them : they have had my!
my And mock him home to Windsor house a week at command; I have turned away
The children must my other guests: they must come off'; I'll sauce
C|Be practised well to this, or they'll ne'er do't. them: Come.
Eva. I will teach the children their behaviours; SCENE IV.--A Room in Ford's House. and I will be like a jack-an-apes also, to burn the
knight with my taber. Enter Page, Ford, Mrs. Page, Mrs. Ford, and
Ford, That will be excellent. I'll go buy them Sir Hugh Evans.
vizards. Eva. "Tis one of the pest discretions of a 'oman Mrs. Page. My Nan shall be the queen of all the as ever I did look upon.
Finely attired in a robe of white.
[fairies, Page. And did he send you both these letters at Page. That silk will I go buy ;-and in that time an instant?
Shall master Slender steal my Nan away, [Aside. Mrs. Page. Within a quarter of an hour.
And marry her at Eton.-Go, send to Falstaff Ford. Pardon me, wife: Henceforth do what
straight. thou wilt ;
| Ford. Nay, I'll to him again, in name of Brook ; I rather will suspect the sun with cold,
He'll tell me all his purpose : Sure, he'll come. Than thee with wantonness : now doth thy honour Mrs. Page. Fear not you that: Go, get us proIn him that was of late an heretick, [stand, And tricking for our fairies.
[perties, ds firm as faith.
| Eva. Let us about it: It is admirable pleasures, Page.
'Tis well, 'tis well; no more. and fery honest knaveries. Be not as extreme in submission,
[Exeunt Page, Ford, and Evans. As in offence;
Mrs. Page. Go, mistress Ford, But let our plot go forward : let our wives
Send quickly to sir John, to know his mind. Yet once again, to make us publick sport,
(Erit Mrs. Ford. Appoint a meeting with this old fat fellow,
I'll to the doctor; he hath my good will, Where we may take him, and disgrace him for it. And none but he, to marry with Nan Page. Ford. There is no better way than that they That Slender, though well landed, is an idiot; spoke of.
And he my husband best of all affects : Page. How ! to send him word they'll meet him The doctor is well money'd, and his friends in the park at midnight; fie, fie; he'll never come. Potent at court; he, none but he, shall have her,
Eva. You say, he has been thrown into the rivers ; Though twenty thousand worthier come to crave and has been grievously peaten, as an old 'oman;
[Erit. methinks there should be terrors in him, that he should not come; methinks, his flesh is punished,
SCENE V.A Room in the Garter Inn. he shall have no desires.
Enter Host and simple. Page. So think I too. Mrs. Ford. Devise but how you'll use him when Host. What wouldst thou have, boor? what, he comes,
thick skin ; speak, breathe, discuss; brief, short, And let us two devise to bring him thither.
quick, snap. Mrs. Page. There is an old tale goes, that Herne Sim. Marry, sir, I come to speak with Sir John the hunter,
Falstaff from master Slender. Sometime a keeper here in Windsor forest,
Host. There's his chamber, his house, his castle, Doth all the winter time, at still midnight, his standing-bed, and truckle-bed; 'tis painted Walk round about an oak, with great ragg'd horns; about with the story of the prodigal, fresh and new : And there he blasts the tree, and takes the cattle; Go, knock and call; he'll speak like an AnthropoAnd makes milch-kine yield blood, and shakes a phaginian unto thee: Knock, I say. In a most hideous and dreadful manner: chain Sim. There's an old woman, a fat woman, gone You have heard of such a spirit; and well you know, up into his chamber; I'll be so bold as stay, sir, The superstitious idle-headed eld
till she come down; I come to speak with her, Received, and did deliver to our age,
indeed. This tale of Herne the hunter for a truth.
Host, Ha! a fat woman! the knight may be Page. Why, yet there want not many, that do fear robbed : I'll call.-Bully knight! Bully sir John! In deep of night to walk by this Herne's oak: speak from thy lungs military : Art thou there? it But what of this?
is thine host, thine Ephesian, calls. Mrs. Ford. Marry, this is our device;
Fal. (abore.] How now, mine host?
Host. Here's a Bohemian-Tartar tarries the com- knight; I am undone: fly, run, hue and cry, viling down of thy fat woman; Let her descend, lain! I am undone : bully, let her descend; my chambers are honour
[Ereunt Host and Bardolph. able : Fye! privacy ? fye!
Fal. I would, all the world might be cozened;
for I have been cozened, and beaten too. If it Enter Falstaff.
should come to the ear of the court, how I have
been transformed, and how my transformation Fal. There was, mine host, an old fat woman, hath been washed and cudgeled, they would melt even now with me; but she's gone.
me out of my fat, drop by drop, and liquor fisherSim. Pray you, sir, was't not the wise woman of men's boots
men's boots with me; I warrant, they would whip Brentford ?
me with their fine wits, till I were as crest-fallen Fal. Ay, marry, was it, muscle-shell; What ty muscle-snell; What as a dried pear. I never prospered since I for
are would you with her ?
swore myself at primero. Well, if my wind were Sim. My master, sir, my master Slender, sent to but long enough to say my prayers, I would reher, seeing her go through the streets, to know,
pent. sir, whether one Nym, sir, that beguiled him of a chain, had the chain, or no.
Enter Mistress Quickly. Fal. I spake with the old woman about it.
Now! whence come you? Sim. And what says she, I pray, sir?
Quick. From the two parties, forsooth. Fal. Marry, she says, that the very same man, e very same man: Fal. The devil take one party, and his dam the
de that beguiled master Slender of his chain, cozened other, and so they shall be both bestowed! I have him of it.
suffered more for their sakes, more, than the vilSim. I would, I could have spoken with the lainous inconstancy of man's disposition is able to woman herself; I had other things to have spoken
bear. with her too, from him.
Quick. And have not they suffered ? Yes, I warFul. What are they? let us know.
rant; speciously one of them; mistress Ford, gooel Host. Ay, come; quick.
heart, is beaten black and blue, that you cannot Sim. I niay not conceal them, sir.
see a white spot about her. Fal. Conceal them, or thou diest.
Fal. What tell'st thou me of black and blue ? no Why, sir, they were nothing but about I was beaten myself into all the colours of the mistress Anne Page; to know if it were my mas-rainbow: and I was like to be apprehended for the ter's fortune to have her, or no.
witch of Brentford; but that my admirable dexFul. Tis, 'tis his fortune.
terity of wit, my counterfeiting the action of an Sim. What, sir?
old woman, deliver'd me, the knave constable had Fal. To have her, or no. Go; say, the woman set me i' the stocks, i' the common stocks, for a told me so.
witch. Sim. May I be so bold to say so, sir ?
Quick. Sir, let me speak with you in your chamFal. Ay, sir Tike; who more bold ?
ber: you shall hear how things go; and, I warrant, Sim. I thank your worship. I shall make my to your content. Here is a letter will say somemaster glad with these tidings. [Exit Simple. what. Good hearts, what ado here is to bring you
Host. Thou art clerkly, thou art clerkly, sir John: together! Sure one of you does not serve heaven Was there a wise woman with thee?
well, that you are so crossed. Fal. Ay, that there was, mine host; one that
Ful. Come up into my chamber. (Exeunt. hath taught me more wit than ever I learned before in my life: and I paid nothing for it neither, butSCENE VI.-- Another Room in the Garter Inn. was paid for my learning.
Enter Fenton and Host.
Host. Master Fenton, talk not to me; my mind
And, as I am a gentleman, I'll give thee (pose, Bard. Run away with the cozeners : for so soon A hundred pound in gold, more than your loss. as I came beyond Eton, they threw me off, from H ost. I will hear you, master Fenton; and I behind one of them, in a slough of mire; and set will, at the least, keep your council. spurs, and away, like three German devils, three Fent. From time to time I have acquainted you Doctor Faustuses.
With the dear love I bear to fair Anne Page; Host. They are gone but to meet the duke, vil-Who, mutually, hath answered my affection lain : do not say, they be fled ; Germans are honest (So far forth as herself might be her chooser,) men.
Even to my wish : I have a letter from her
Of such contents as you will wonder at;
The mirth whereof so larded with may matter, Eva. Where is mine host?
That neither, singly, can be manifested, Host. What is the matter, sir ?
Without the show of both ;-wherein fat Falstaff Eva. Have a care of your entertainments: there Hath a great scene: the image of the jest is a friend of mine come to town, tells me, there
[Showing the letter. is three cousin germans, that has cozened all the I'll show you here at large. Hark, good mine host : hosts of Readings, of Maidenhead, of Colebrook, To-night at Herne's oak, just 'twixt twelve and of horses and money. I tell you for good-will, Must my sweet Nan present the fairy queen : [one, look you: you are wise, and full of gibes and The purpose why, is here; in which disguise, vlouting-stogs; and 'tis not convenient you should While other jests are something rank on foot, be cozened : Fare you well.
(Exit. Her father hath commanded her to slip
| Away with Slender, and with him at Eton Enter Dr. Caius.
Immediately to marry: she hath consented : Caius. Vere is mine Host de Jarterre ?
Now, sir, Host. Here, master doctor, in perplexity, and Her mother, even strong against that match, doubtful dilemma.
And firm for doctor Caius, hath appointed Caius. I cannot tell vat is dat: But it is tell-a That he shall likewise shuffle her away, me, dat you make great preparation for a duke While other sports are tasking of their minds, de Jarmany : by my trot, dere is no duke, dat de And at the deanery, where a priest attends, sourt is know to come : I tell you for good vill : Straight marry her: to this her mother's plot adieu.
Erit. She, seemingly obedient, likewise hath Host. Hue and cry, villain, goi--assist me, Made promise to the doctor ;-Now thus it rests.