Ros. Why, that they have; and bid them so be! gone. Boyet. She says, you have it, and you may be gone. King. Say to her, we have measur'd many miles, To tread a measure with her on this grass. Boyet. They say that they have measur'd many a mile, To tread a measure with you on this grass. Ros. It is not so: ask them, how many inches Is in one mile: if they have measur'd many, The measure then of one is easily told. Boyet. If, to come hither you have measur'd And many miles; the princess bids you tell, Biron. Tell her, we measure them by weary steps. How many weary steps, That we may do it still without accompt. [you; Ros. My face is but a moon, and clouded too. King. Blessed are clouds, to do as such clouds do! Vouchsafe, bright moon, and these thy stars, to shine (Those clouds remov'd,) upon our wat'ry eyne. Ros. O vain petitioner! beg a greater matter; Thou bid'st me beg; this begging is not strange. soon. moon. King. Will you not dance? How come you thus estrang'd? [chang'd. Ros. You took the moon at full; but now she's Ros. We can afford no more at such a price. Let it not be sweet. Biron. Therefore meet. [They converse apart. Dum. Will you vouchsafe with me to change a Mar. Name it. Say you so? Fair lord,- Take that for your fair lady. Dum. As much in private, and I'll bid adieɩ.. [They converse apart. Kath. What, was your visor made without a tongue ? Long. I know the reason, lady, why you ask. [a calf? No, I'll not be your half: Will you give horns, chaste lady? do not so. Cutting a smaller hair than may be seen; [keen Above the sense of sense: so sensible [wings, Ros. Not one word more, my maids; break off, [Exeunt King, Lords, Moth, Musick, and Attend ants. Prin. Twenty adieus, my frozen Muscovites.- puff'd out. [fat, fat. Qualm, perhaps. Kath. Yes, in good faith. caps. But will you hear? the king is my love sworn. Prin. How blow? how blow? speak to be under- Prin. Avaunt, perplexity! What shall we do, Ros. Good madam, if by me you'll be advis'd, And wonder, what they were; and to what end Boyet. Ladies, withdraw: the gallants are at hand. Prin. Whip to our tents, as roes run over land. [Exeunt Princess, Ros. Kath. and Maria. Enter the King, Biron, Longaville, and Dumain, in their proper habits. King. Fair sir, God save you! Where is the princess? Boyet. Gone to her tent: Please it your majesty, Command me any service to her thither? King. That she vouchsafe me audience for one word. Boyet. I will; and so will she, I know, my lord. [Exit. Biron. This fellow pecks up wit, as pigeons peas; And utters it again when God doth please: He is wit's pedler; and retails his wares At wakes, and wassels, meetings, markets, fairs; And we that sell by gross, the Lord doth know, Have not the grace to grace it with such show. This gallant pins the wenches on his sleeve; Had he been Adam, he had tempted Eve: He can carve too, and lisp: Why, this is he, That kiss'd away his hand in courtesy ; This is the ape of form, monsieur the nice, That, when he plays at tables, chides the dice In honourable terms; nay, he can sing A mean most meanly; and, in ushering, Mend him who can the ladies call him, sweet; The stairs, as he treads on them, kiss his feet: This is the flower that smiles on every one, To show his teeth as white us whales bone: And consciences, that will not die in debt, Pay him the due of honey-tongued Boyet. King. A blister on his sweet tongue, with my That put Armado's page out of his part! [heart, Enter the Princess, ushered by Boyet; Rosaline, Maria, Katharine, and Attendants. Biron. See where it comes!-Behaviour, what wert thou, Till this man show'd thee? and what art thou now? King. All hail, sweet madam, and fair time of day! Prin. Fair, in all hail, is foul, as I conceive. King. Construe my speeches better, if you may. Prin. Then wish me better, I will give you leave. King. We came to visit you; and purpose now To lead you to our court: vouchsafe it then. Prin. This field shall hold me; and so hold your YOW: Nor God, nor I, delight in perjur'd men. For virtue's office never breaks men's troth. A world of torments though I should endure, I would not yield to be your house's guest: So much I hate a breaking cause to be Of heavenly oaths, vow'd with integrity. King. O, you have liv'd in desolation here, Unseen, unvisited, much to our shame. Prin. Not so, my lord, it is not so, I swear; We have had pastimes here, and pleasant A mess of Russians left us but of late. [game; King. How, madam? Russians? Prin. Ay, in truth, my lord; Trim gallants, full of courtship, and of state. Ros. Madam, speak true:-It is not so, my lord; My lady, (to the manner of the days,) In courtesy, gives undeserving praise. We four, indeed, confronted here with four In Russian habit; here they staid an hour, And talk'd apace; and in that hour, my lord, They did not bless us with one happy word. I cannot give you less. Ros. Which of the visors was it, that you wore ? Biron. Where? when? what visor? why de mand you this? Ros. There, then, that visor; that superfluous case, That hid the worse, and show'd the better face. King. We are descried: they'll mock us now downright. Dum. Let us confess, and turn it to a jest. Prin. Amaz'd, my lord? Why looks your highness sad? [look you pale ?Ros. Help, hold his brows! he'll swoon? Why Sea-sick, I think, coming from Muscovy. Biron. Thus pour the stars down plagues for perjury. Can any face of brass hold longer out?— Here stand 1, lady; dart thy skill at me ; Bruise me with scorn, confound me with a flout; Thrust thy sharp wit quite through my ignorance, Cut me to pieces with thy keen conceit; And I will wish thee never more to dance, Nor never more in Russian habit wait. O! never will I trust to speeches penn'd, Nor to the motion of a school boy's tongue; Figures pedantical; these summer-flies Have blown me full of maggot ostentation: By this white glove, (how white the hand, God knows!) Henceforth my wooing mind shall be express'd In russet yeas, and honest kersey noes: And, to begin, wench,-so God help me, la ! My love to thee is sound, sans crack or flaw. Ros. Sans sans, I pray you. Biron. Yet I have a trick Of the old rage:-bear with me, I am sick; I'll leave it by degrees. Soft, let us see;Write, Lord have mercy on us, on those three ; They are infected, in their hearts it lies; They have the plague, and caught it of your eyes: These lords are visited; you are not free, For the Lord's tokens on you do I see. [to us. Prin. No, they are free, that gave these tokens Biron. Our states are forfeit, seek not to undo us. Ros. It is not so; For how can this be true, That you stand forfeit, being those that sue? Biron. Peace; for I will not have to do with you. Ros. Nor shall not, if I do as I intend. Biron. Speak for yourselves, my wit is at an end. King. Teach us, sweet madam, for our rude transgression Some fair excuse. Prin. The fairest is confession. Were you not here, but even now, disguis'd? King. Madam, I was. Prin. And were you well advis'd? King. I was, fair madam. When you then were here, What did you whisper in your lady's ear? [her. King. That more than all the world I did respect Prin. When she shall challenge this, you will reject her. King. Upon mine honour, no. Prin. Peace, peace, forbear; Your oath once broke, you force not to fors wear. King. Despise me, when I break this oath of mine. Prin. I will: and therefore keep it :-Rosaline, What did the Russian whisper in your ear? Ros. Madam, he swore that he did hold me dear As precious eye-sight; and did value me Above this world: adding thereto, moreover, That he would wed me, or else die my lover. Prin. God give thee joy of him! the noble lord Most honourably doth uphold his word. King. What mean you, madam? by my life, my troth, I never swore this lady such an oath. Ros. By heaven you did; and to confirm it plain, You gave me this: but take it, sir, again. King. My faith, and this, the princess I did give; I knew her by this jewel on her sleeve. That sport best pleases, that doth least know how: Arm. Anointed, I implore so much expence of royal sweet breath, as will utter a brace of words. Prin. Pardon me, sir, this jewel did she wear; And lord Biron, I thank him, is my dear :What; will you have me, or your pearl again? Biron. Neither of either; I remit both twain.-thy I see the trick on't;-Here was a consent, (Knowing aforehand of our merriment,) To dash it like a Christmas comedy: Some carry-tale, some please-man, some slight zany, [Dick,Some mumble-news, some trencher-knight, some That smiles his cheek in years; and knows the trick Welcome, pure wit! thou partest a fair fray. Whether the three worthies shall come in, or no. You cannot beg us, sir, I can assure you, sir; we know what we know: I hope, sir, three times thrice, sir,- Is not nine. Cost. Under correction, sir, we know whereuntil it doth amount. Biron. By Jove, I always took three threes for nine. Cost. O Lord, sir, it were pity you should get your living by reckoning, sir. Biron. How much is it? Cost. O Lord, sir, the parties themselves, the actors, sir, will show whereuntil it doth amount: for my own part, I am, as they say, but to parfect one man,-e'en one poor man; Pompion the great, sir. Biron. Art thou one of the worthies? Cost. It pleased them, to think me worthy of Pompion the great: for mine own part, I know [Armado converses with the King, and delivers Prin. Doth this man serve God? Prin. He speaks not like a man of God's making. Arm. That's all one, my fair, sweet, honey mo narch: for, I protest, the school-master is exceeding fantastical; too, too vain; too, too vain; But we will put it, as they say, to fortuna della guerra. I wish you the peace of mind, most royal couplement! [Exit Armado. King. Here is like to be a good presence of worthies: He presents Hector of Troy; the swain, Pompey the great; the parish curate, Alexander; Armado's page, Hercules; the pedant, Judas Machabæus. And if these four worthies in their first show thrive, These four will change habits, and present the other five. Boyet. You lie, you are not he. With libbard's head on knee. Biron. Well said, old mocker; I must needs be friends with thee. Cost. I Pompey am, Pompey surnam'd the big, Cost. It is great, sir;-Pompey surnam'd the great: That oft in field, with targe and shield, did make my foe to sweat: And travelling along this coast, I here am come by chance; And lay my arms before the legs of this sweet lass of France. [done. If your ladyship would say, Thanks, Pompey, I had Prin. Great thanks, great Pompey. Cost. "Tis not so much worth; but, I hope, I was perfect: I made a little fault in, great. Biron. My hat to a halfpenny, Pompey proves the best worthy. Enter Nathaniel arm'd, for Alexander. Nath. When in the world I liv'd, I was the world's commander; By east, west, north, and south, I spread my conquering might: My 'scutcheon pain declares, that I am Alisander. Boyet. Your nose says, no, you are not; for it stands too right. [smelling knight. Biron. Your nose smells, no, in this, most tenderPrin. The conqueror is dismay'd: Proceed, good Alexander. Nath. When in the world I liv'd, I was the world's commander ; Boyet. Most true, 'tis right; you were so, AliBiron. Pompey the great,[sander. Cost. Your servant, and Costard. Biron. Take away the conqueror, take away Alisander. Cost. O, sir, [to Nath.] you have overthrown Alisander the conqueror ! You will be scraped out of the painted cloth for this: your lion, that holds his poll-ax sitting on a close stool, will be given to A-jax: he will be the ninth worthy. A conqueror, and afeard to speak! run away for shame, Alisander. [Nath. retires.] There, an't shall please you; a foolish mild man; an honest man, look you, and soon dash'd! He is a marvellous good neighbour, insooth; and a very good bowler: but, for Alisander, alas, you see, how 'tis ;-a little o'erparted :-But there are worthies a-coming will speak their mind in some other sort. Prin. Stand aside, good Pompey. Dum. Though my mocks come home by me, I will now be merry. King. Hector was but a Trojan in respect of this. Dum. I think, Hector was not so clean-timbered. Dum. More calf, certain. Boyet. No; he is best indued in the small. Dum. He's a god or a painter; for he makes faces. Dum. A gilt nutmeg. Biron. A lemon. Long. Stuck with cloves. Dum. No, cloven. Arm. Peace! The armipotent Mars, of lances the almighty, A I man so breath'd, that certain he would fight, yea From morn till night, out of his pavilion. am that flower, Dum. That mint. Long. That columbine. Arm. Sweet lord Longaville, rein thy tongue. Long. I must rather give it the rein, for it runs against Hector. Dum. Ay, and Hector's a greyhound. Arm. The sweet war-man is dead and rotten sweet chucks, beat not the bones of the buried: Enter Holofernes, arm'd, for Judas, and Moth, when he breath'd, he was a man-But I will forward arm'd, for Hercules. Hol. You have put me out of countenance. Biron. False: we have given thee faces. Hol. But you have out-fac'd them all. Biron. An thou wert a lion, we would do so. Boyet. Therefore, as he is, an ass, let him go. And so adieu, sweet Jude! nay, why dost thou stay? Dum. For the latter end of his name. Biron. For the ass to the Jude, give it him :Jud-as, away. Hol. This is not generous, not gentle; not humble. Boyet. A light for monsieur Judas: it grows dark, he may stumble. [baited! Prin. Alas, poor Machabæus, how hath he been Enter Armado, arm'd, for Hector. Biron. Hide thy head, Achilles; here comes Hector in arms. with my device: Sweet royalty, [to the Princess.] bestow on me the sense of hearing. [Biron whispers Costard. Prin. Speak, brave Hector: we are much de lighted. Arm. I do adore thy sweet grace's slipper. Dum. He may not by the yard. Arm. This Hector far surmounted Hannibal,Cost. The party is gone, fellow Hector, she is gone; she is two months on her way. Arm. What meanest thou? Cost. Faith, unless you play the honest Trojan, the poor wench is cast away: she's quick; the child brags in her belly already; 'tis yours. Arm. Dost thou infamonize me among potentates? thou shalt die. Cost. Then shall Hector be whipp'd, for Jaquenetta that is quick by him; and hang'd, for Pompey that is dead by him. Dum. Most rare Pompey! Boyet. Renowned Pompey ! Biron. Greater than great, great, great, great Pompey! Pompey, the huge! Dum. Hector trembles. Biron. Pompey is mov'd:-More Ates, more Ates; stir them on! stir them on! Dum. Hector will challenge him. Biron. Ay, if he have no more man's blood in's belly than will sup a flea. Arm. By the north pole, I do challenge thee. Cost. I will not fight with a pole, like a northern man; I'll slash; I'll do it by the sword :-I pray you, let me borrow my arins again. Dum. Room for the incensed worthies. Dum. Most resolute Pompey! Moth. Master, let me take you a button-hole lower. Do you not see, Pompey is uncasing for the combat? What mean you? you will lose your reputation. Arm. Gentlemen, and soldiers, pardon me ; I will not combat in my shirt. Dum. You may not deny it; Pompey hath made the challenge. Arm. Sweet bloods, I both may and will. Arm. The naked truth of it is, I have no shirt; I go wool ward for penance. Boyet. True, and it was enjoin'd him in Rome for want of linen: since when, I'll be sworn, he wore none, but a dish-clout of Jaquenetta's; and that 'a | wears next his heart, for a favour. Enter Mercade. Mer. God save you, madam! But that thou interrupt'st our merriment. Mer. I am sorry, madam; for the news I bring, Is heavy in my tongue. The king your fatherPrin. Dead, for my life. Mer. Even so; my tale is told. Biron. Worthies, away; the scene begins to cloud. King. How fares your majesty ? King. The extreme parts of time extremely form The holy suit which fain it would convince; Prin. A time, methinks, too short For the remembrance of my father's death. King. If this, or more than this, I would deny, Ros. You must be purged too, your sins are rank; A twelvemonth shall you spend, and never rest, From what it purpos'd; since, to wail friends lost, With three-fold love I wish you all these three. Prin. I understand you not; my griefs are double. And by these badges understand the king. Hath much deform'd us, fashioning our humours To those that make us both,-fair ladies, you: Dum. O, shall I say, I thank you, gentle wife? I'll mark no words that smooth-fac'd wooers say: Dum. I'll serve thee true and faithfully till then. Mar. At the twelvemonth's end, Ros. Oft have I heard of you, my lord Biron, To weed this wormwood from your fruitful brain; Prin. We have receiv'd your letters, full of love; With all the fierce endeavour of your wit, Your favours, the embassadors of love; At courtship, pleasant jest, and courtesy, To enforce the pained impotent to smile. Ros. Why, that's the way to choke a gibing Whose influence is begot of that loose grace, |