SCENE I.-The Forest.

Enter TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY. Touch. We shall find a time, Audrey; patience, gentle Audrey.

Aud. 'Faith, the priest was good enough, for all the old gentleman's saying.

Touch. A most wicked Sir Oliver, Audrey; a most vile Martext. But, Audrey, there is a youth here in the forest lays claim to you.

Aud. Ay, I know who 'tis; he hath no interest in me in the world: here comes the man you

mean.

Enter WILLIAM.

Touch. It is meat and drink to me to see a clown. By my troth, we that have good wits

have much to answer for: we shall be flouting; we cannot hold.

Will. Good even, Audrey.

Aud. God ye good even, William.
Will. And good even to you, sir.

Touch. Good even, gentle friend. Cover thy head, cover thy head: nay, pr'y thee be covered. How old are you, friend?

Will. Five-and-twenty, sir.

Touch. A ripe age. Is thy name William?
Will. William, sir.

Touch. A fair name. Wast born i' the forest here?
Will. Ay, sir, I thank God.

Touch. "Thank God;"

rich?

Will. 'Faith, sir, so-so.

-a good answer. Art

Touch. "So-so," is good, very good, very excellent good:-and yet it is not; it is but so-so. Art thou wise?

Will. Ay, sir, I have a pretty wit.

Touch. Why, thou sayst well. I do now remember a saying; "The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool." The heathen philosopher, when he had a desire to eat a grape, would open his lips when he put it into his mouth: meaning thereby, that grapes were made to eat, and lips to open. You do love this maid?

Will. I do, sir.

Touch. Give me your hand. Art thou learned? Will. No, sir.

Touch. Then learn this of me :-To have, is to have for it is a figure in rhetoric, that drink, being poured out of a cup into a glass, by filling the one doth empty the other. For all your writers do consent that ipse is he: now you are not ipse, for I am he.

Will. Which he, sir?

Touch. He, sir, that must marry this woman. Therefore, you clown, abandon-which is in the vulgar leave-the society-which in the boorish is company-of this female-which in the common is woman, which together is, abandon the society of this female; or, clown, thou perishest; or, to thy better understanding, diest; to wit, I kill thee, make thee away, translate thy life into death, thy liberty into bondage. I will deal in poison with thee, or in bastinado, or in steel; I will bandy with thee in faction; I will o'errun thee with policy; I will kill thee a hundred and fifty ways; therefore tremble, and depart. Aud. Do, good William.

Will. God rest you merry, sir.

Enter CORIN.

[Exit.

Cor. Our master and mistress seek you: come, away, away.

Touch. Trip, Audrey; trip, Audrey.-I attend, I attend. [Exeunt.

SCENE II.-The same.

Enter ORLANDO and OLIVER.

Orl. Is 't possible, that on so little acquaintance you should like her? that, but seeing, you should love her? and loving, woo? and wooing, she should grant? and will you perséver to enjoy her?

Oli. Neither call the giddiness of it in question, the poverty of her, the small acquaintance, my sudden wooing, nor her sudden consenting: but say with me, I love Aliena; say with her, that she loves me consent with both, that we may

enjoy each other: it shall be to your good; for my father's house, and all the revenue that was old Sir Rowland's, will I estate upon you, and here live and die a shepherd.

Enter ROSALIND.

Orl. You have my consent. Let your wedding be to-morrow: thither will I invite the Duke, and all his contented followers. Go you, and prepare Aliena; for, look you, here comes my Rosalind. Ros. God save you, brother. Oli. And you, fair sister.

Ros. O, my dear Orlando, how it grieves me to see thee wear thy heart in a scarf. Orl. It is my arm.

Ros. I thought thy heart had been wounded with the claws of a lion.

Orl. Wounded it is, but with the eyes of a lady. Ros. Did your brother tell you how I counterfeited to swoon, when he shewed me your handkerchief?

Orl. Ay, and greater wonders than that. Ros. O, I know where you are:re:-Nay, 'tis true; there was never anything so sudden, but the fight of two rams, and Cæsar's thrasonical brag of, "I came, saw, and overcame:"-for your brother and my sister no sooner met, but they looked; no sooner looked, but they loved; no sooner loved, but they sighed; no sooner sighed, but they asked one another the reason; no sooner knew the reason, but they sought the remedy: and in these degrees have they made a pair of stairs to marriage, which they will climb incontinent, or else be incontinent before marriage they are in the very wrath of love, and they will together; clubs cannot part them.

Orl. They shall be married to-morrow; and I will bid the Duke to the nuptial. But O, how bitter a thing it is to look into happiness through another man's eyes! By so much the more shall I to-morrow be at the height of heart-heaviness, by how much I shall think my brother happy in having what he wishes for.

Ros. Why then, to-morrow I cannot serve your turn for Rosalind?

Orl. I can live no longer by thinking.

Ros. I will weary you no longer, then, with idle talking. Know of me then (for now I speak to some purpose), that I know you are a gentleman of good conceit: I speak not this that you should bear a good opinion of my knowledge, insomuch I say I know you are; neither do I labour for a greater esteem than may in some little measure draw a belief from you to do yourself good, and not to grace me. Believe then, if you please, that I can do strange things: I have, since I was three years old, conversed with a

magician, most profound in his art, and yet not damnable. If you do love Rosalind so near the heart as your gesture cries it out, when your brother marries Aliena shall you marry her. I know into what straits of fortune she is driven; and it is not impossible to me, if it appear not inconvenient to you, to set her before your eyes to-morrow, human as she is, and without any danger.

Orl. Speakest thou in sober meanings? Ros. By my life, I do; which I tender dearly, though I say I am a magician. Therefore, put you in your best array; bid your friends for if you will be married to-morrow, you shall; and to Rosalind, if you will.

All humbleness, all patience and impatience;
All purity, all trial, all observance :-
And so am I for Phebe.

Phe. And so am I for Ganymede.
Orl. And so am I for Rosalind.
Ros. And so am I for no woman.
Phe. If this be so, why blame you me to love
you?
[To ROSALIND.

Sil. If this be so, why blame you me to love you? [TO PHEBE.

Orl. If this be so, why blame you me to love you? Ros. Who do you speak to, "Why blame you

me to love you?"

Orl. To her that is not here, nor doth not hear. Ros. Pray you, no more of this: 'tis like the howling of Irish wolves against the moon.-I will help you [to SILVIUS], if I can :-I would love you [to PHEBE], if I could.-To-morrow, meet me all together.-I will marry you [to PHEBE], if ever I marry woman, and I'll be married tomorrow:-I will satisfy you [to ORLANDO], if ever I satisfied man, and you shall be married tomorrow:-I will content you [to SILVIUS], if what pleases you contents you, and you shall be married to-morrow.-As you [to ORLANDO] love Rosalind, meet;-as you [to SILVIUS] love Phebe, meet; and as I love no woman, I'll meet.-So, fare you well; I have left you commands. Sil. I'll not fail, if I live. Phe. Nor I.

You say, if I bring in your Rosalind,

[To the DUKE. You will bestow her on Orlando here? Duke S. That would I, had I kingdoms to give with her.

Ros. And you say, you will have her, when I bring her? [TO ORLANDO. Orl. That would I, were I of all kingdoms king. Ros. You say, you'll marry me, if I be willing? [TO PHEBE.

Phe. That will I, should I die the hour after. Ros. But if you do refuse to marry me, You'll give yourself to this most faithful shepherd? Phe. So is the bargain.

Ros. You say, that you'll have Phebe, if she will? [TO SILVIUS.

Sil. Though to have her and death were both one thing.

Ros. I have promised to make all this matter

even.

Keep you your word, O Duke, to give your daughter:

You yours, Orlando, to receive his daughter:
Keep you your word, Phebe, that you'll marry me;
Or else, refusing me, to wed this shepherd:
Keep your word, Silvius, that you'll marry her,
If she refuse me :-and from hence I go,
To make these doubts all even.

[Exeunt ROSALIND and Celia. Duke S. I do remember in this shepherd-boy Some lively touches of my daughter's favour. Orl. My lord, the first time that I ever saw him,

Methought he was a brother to your daughter:
But, my good lord, this boy is forest-born;
And hath been tutored in the rudiments
Of many desperate studies by his uncle,
Whom he reports to be a great magician,
Obscured in the circle of this forest.

undone three tailors; I have had four quarrels, and like to have fought one.

Jaq. And how was that ta'en up?

Touch. 'Faith, we met, and found the quarrel was upon the seventh cause.

Jaq. How seventh cause?-Good my lord, like this fellow.

Duke S. I like him very well.

Touch. God'ield you, sir; I desire you of the like. I press in here, sir, amongst the rest of the country copulatives, to swear and to forswear; according as marriage binds and blood breaks. A poor virgin, sir, an ill-favoured thing, sir, but mine own; a poor humour of mine, sir, to take that that no man else will. Rich honesty dwells like a miser, sir, in a poor house; as your pearl in your foul oyster.

Duke S. By my faith, he is very swift and sententious.

Touch. According to the fool's bolt, sir, and such dulcet diseases.

Jaq. But, for the seventh cause: how did you find the quarrel on the seventh cause?

Touch. Upon a lie seven times removed :bear your body more seeming, Audrey :—as thus, sir. I did dislike the cut of a certain courtier's beard: he sent me word, if I said his beard was not cut well, he was in the mind it was: this is called the "Retort courteous." If I sent him word again it was not well cut, he would send me word he cut it to please himself: this is called the "Quip modest." If again it was not well cut, he disabled my judgment: this is called the "Reply churlish." If again it was not well cut, he would answer, I spake not true: this is called the " Reproof valiant." If again it was not well cut, he would say, I lie: this is called the "Countercheck quarrelsome :”—and so to the "Lie circumstantial," and the "Lie direct."

Jaq. And how oft did you say his beard was not well cut?

Touch. I durst go no further than the "Lie circumstantial," nor he durst not give me the "Lie direct;" and so we measured swords, and parted.

Jaq. Can you nominate in order, now, the degrees of the lie?

Touch. O, sir, we quarrel in print, by the book; as you have books for good manners. I will name you the degrees. The first, the Retort courteous; the second, the Quip modest; the third, the Reply churlish; the fourth, the Reproof valiant; the fifth, the Countercheck quarrelsome; the sixth, the Lie with circumstance; the seventh, the Lie direct. All these you may avoid, but the lie direct; and you may avoid