Then, knocking out his pipe with care,
Laid down his penny at the bar;
And, wrapping round his frieze furtout,
Took up his crab-tree, and walk'd out.
ACK CARELESS was a man of parts,
Well-skill'd in the politer arts,
With judgement read, with humour writ,
Among his friends past for a wit:
But lov'd his eafe more than his meat,
And wonder'd knaves could toil and cheat,
T'expose themselves by being great.
At no levees the fuppliant bow'd;
Nor courted for their votes the crowd:
Nor riches nor preferment fought,
Did what he pleas'd, spoke what he thought.
Content within due bounds to live,
And what he could not fpend, to give:
Would whiff his pipe o'er nappy ale,
And joke, and pun, and tell his tale;
Reform the state, lay down the law,
And talk of lords he never faw;
Fight Malborough's battles o'er again,
And push the French on Blenheim's plain;
Difcourfe of Paris, Naples, Rome,
Though he had never stirr'd from home :
'Tis true he travel'd with great care,
The tour of Europe--in his chair.
Was loth to part without his load,
Or move till morning peep'd abroad.
One day this honeft, idle rake,
Nor quite afleep, nor well awake,
Was lolling in his elbow-chair,
And building castles in the air,
His nipperkin (the port was good)
Half empty at his elbow ftood,
When a strange noise offends his ear,
The din increas'd as it came near,
And in his yard at last he view'd
Of farmers a great multitude;
Who that day, walking of their rounds,
Had disagreed about their bounds;
And fure the difference must be wide,
Where each does for himself decide.
Vollies of oaths in vain they fwear,
Which burft like guiltless bombs in air;
And, "Thou 'rt a knave!" and, "Thou 'rt an oaf!"
Is banded round with truth enough.
At length they mutually agree,
His worship should be referee,
Which courteous Jack confents to be:
Though for himself he would not budge,
Yet for his friends an arrant drudge;
A confcience of this point he made,
With pleasure readily obey'd,
And shot like lightning to their aid.
The farmers, fummon'd to his room,
Bowing with awkward reverence come.
In his great chair his worship fate,
A grave and able magiftrate:
Silence proclaim'd, each clack was laid,
And flippant tongues with pain obey'd.
In a fhort speech, he first computes
The vast expence of law. difputes,
And everlasting chancery-fuits.
With zeal and warmth he railly'd then
Pack'd juries, fheriffs, tales-men;
And recommended in the close,
Good-neighbourhood, peace, and repofe.
Next weigh'd with care each man's pretence,
Perus'd records, heard evidence,
Obferv'd, reply'd, hit every blot,
Unravel'd every Gordian knot;
With great activity and parts,
Inform'd their judgements, won their hearts :
And, without fees, or time mispent,
By strength of ale and argument,
Difpatch'd them home, friends and content.
Trufty, who at his elbow fate,
And with furprize heard the debate,
Aftonish'd, could not but admire
His ftrange dexterity and fire;
His wife difcernment and good fense,
His quickness, eafe, and eloquence.
"Lord! fir," said he, "I can't but chide:
"What useful talents do you hide!
"In half an hour you have done more
"Than Puzzle can in half a score,
« With all the practice of the courts,
"His cafes, precedents, reports."
Jack with a finile reply'd,
"This may feem odd, my friend, to you,
"But give me not more than my due.
"No hungry judge nods o'er the laws,
“But hastens to decide the cause :
"Who hands the oar, and drags the chain, "Will struggle to be free again.
"So lazy men and indolent,
"With cares opprefs'd, and business spent,
"Exert their utmoft powers and skill,
“Work hard; for what? Why, to fit still.
"They toil, they fweat, they want no fee,
"For ev'n floth prompts to industry.
"Therefore, my friend, I freely own
"All this addrefs I now have shown,
"Is mere impatience, and no more,
"To lounge and loiter as before:
"Life is a fpan, the world an inn-
"Here, firrah, t' other nipperkin.”
Yeoman bold (fuppofe of Kent) Liv'd on his own, and paid no rent ; Manur'd his own paternal land,
Had always money at command,
To purchase bargains, or to lend,
T'improve his flock, or help a friend :
At Creffy and Poitiers, of old,
His ancestors were bow-men bold;
Whofe good yew-bows, and finews strong,
Drew arrows of a cloth-yard long
For England's glory, ftrew'd the plain
With barons, counts, and princes flain.
Belov'd by all the neighbourhood,
For his delight was doing good :
At every mart his word a law,
Kept all the fhuffling knaves in awe.
How juft is heaven, and how true,
To give to fuch defert its due!
'Tis in authentic legends faid,
Two twins at once had blefs'd his bed;
Frank was the eldeft, but the other
Was honest Numps, his younger brother;
That, with a face effeminate,
And shape too fine and delicate,
Took after his fond mother. Kate,
A Franklin's daughter. Numps was rough,
No heart of oak was half fo tough,
And true as fteel, to cuff, or kick,
Or play a bout at double-stick,
Who but friend Numps? While Frank's delight
Was more (they fay) to dance, than fight;
At Whitfon-ales king of the May,
Among the maids, brisk, frolic, gay,
He tript it on each holyday.
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