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Mor. Oh! sare, you are very great polite. Vish you vere at de diable !
(Aside. T. King. Good night! take care you don't catch cold.
Mor. Bon soir, messieurs. I am much glad they are going to go. Au revoir ! Diable ! dis dam puddel in de gutter, I put iny foot on him.
[Exit into house T. King. Mind your rush-light don't go out. Ha, ha, ha! Was there ever seen so curious an avimal ? Let us see what species he belongs to. Lend me your lanthorn, Charley. [Takes Nap's lanthorn, and reads the inscription over Morbleu's door.] “ Monsieur Morbleu, Grand Perruquier en Militaire, Coiffeur en Général.” Ha, ha, ha!Very well, Monsieur Morbleu, Grand Perruquier : it is au revoir with us, indeed. We will speedily become better acquainted. There, Charley, there's your lanthorn, and a tizzy for you, my boy. [ Returns the lanthorn, and gives Nap sixpence.] Zounds! Ardourly, nil desperandum !
Ard. I must: you see she does not appear. What's to be done now?
T. King. Try again. Where is your rascal, Useful ?
T. King. Then that's our point. I cannot, decently, shew myself again to-night to monsieur, therefore, we'll hasten to the Sablonière. You write a passionate billet to Miss Morbleu, and let Useful bring it: he's a sharp dog, and with a little of my instruction, will soon afford iis both satisfaction and amusement. Allons! Au revoir, Monsieur Morblein. Ha, ha, ha!
[Exeunt, R. Enter NAP, from his box. Nap. (R.) Rum blades, them 'ere : out on a lark, I reckon. Well, it's no business of mine, so long as they don't come on my beat. Half past ten !
(Calling the half-hour. Enter THOMPSON and Rusty, R. Rus. I tell you, I'm sure this is the place ; but we'll ask the watchman. Pray, my friend, isn't this the Seven Dials ?
Nap. [Holding lanthorn to Rusty's face.] Ay, master, to be sure it is.
Rus. There, I told you so. Whereabouts does one Mounseer Morebleu live?
Nap. What, the barber ? I don't know: that isa think I can't tell.
Rus. [To Thompson.] He thinks he can't tell !
Nap. (Looking at the shilling.) Oh! I know now; he lives right under your nose : but he's gone to bed.
Thom. We must knock him up; I cannot pause a moment till my doubts are satisfied
Nap. That's your business. (Crosses to L.) Why, the old Frenchman has quite a congregation to-night: but I must go and call the half-hour. Half-past ten! [Exit, L.
Thom. Knock, Rusty, knock. I cannot rest. Rus, No, nor you'll let nobody else rest. Hallo! [Knocks at Morbleu's door.] They're a long time coming.
Thom. Knock again ; try once more.
Rus. It's no use : however, I suppose you won't be contented, so here goes.
(Knocks again. Thom. Dou't you hear the window open ? Rus. Yes, there's somebody getting up in the garret.
Mor. [Looking out of the garret window.] Qui va là ?' Vat is dere, s'il vous plait ? Vy you knock at de door of my maison, if you are so good ?
Thom. 'Tis he, 'tis le! Is your name Morbleu, my
[good friend? Thom. Come down instantly.
Mor. Sacrebleu! vil not de matin do, monsieur ? for I am in bed, je suis au lit.
Thom. No; it is a-matter of life and death.
Mor. Miséricorde ! dey vant me to bleed somebody. Vell, tv oblige you, monsieur, I shall get ip
Thom. Get up! Zounds ! my dear friend, we want you to come down.
Mor. And put on my culotte. Restez là pour un moment. Heigho! I never can get not any rest at all.
[Exit from window. Thom. He's coming, he's coming ; and now, thank heaven, I shall have all my doubts silenced or confirmed.
Enter MORBLEU, from the House. Mor. Yaw'aw! Excusez moi, monsieur, dat I have no candel, but I have burn my rushlight till him rush all away.
Thom. Make vo apologies, my good friend ; the urgent business I conje upon precludes all ceremony. You have a lady under your care, bearing the name of Adoiphine de Courcy ?
Mor. Oui, monsieur, certainement; but she never assist in de shop. She never share any body.
Thom. Psha! You, doubtless, must have heard of an unfortunate man of the name of Thompson?
Mor. Diable! Vat, Monsieur Touson come again ?
I hare heard of no Monsieur Tonson; I tell you so, before, sare; no Monsieur Tonsou do live here. Vat you mean by pull me out of my bed in dis way? By gar! it dam bad manner and no gentilhom nie!
Thom. But hear me my good friend; this Mr. Thompson
Mor. All von cock and some bull; and if you call me up again, ma foi, I shall charge you vit the vash, for keeping de bad hour. Diable ! [Exit into the house, shutting the door in Thompson's fuce.]
Thom. But, my good fellow !-Monsieur -Monsieur. -Ah! I see how it is; these imperious De Courcys have hired this fellow to keep my wife (for it is undoubtedly she) still in their power : but I'll have redress ; I'll go to Bow-street; they've locked her up, and now
Rus. 'Tis high time I should lock you up.
Thom. Nay, Rusty, nay! let us go in search of the police. l'll enter the house by force, liberate my wife, and make a terrible example of those who would detain her from my arms.
[Exeunt, L. Enter USEFUL, R. Usef. So the coast is clear at last. I thought those two old twaddlers never would have gone. Let me see : my instructions are, under pretence of inquiring for Mr. Thompson, to endeavour to give this letter to Miss Morbleu. Here's the house ; now for it. [Knocks at Morbleu's door.) No answer ? I'll knock again. Hallo ! get up, get up!
[Knocking again violently. Mor. [Appearing at the garret window.] Eh, mon Dieu ! is de maison on fire, that you knock so loud ?
Usef. No, but you are wanted; you must come down directly: I am sent here in an official capacity, expressly to-but that is alien to the business.
Mor.' Begar ! vat does he say about his official capacity and de alien business? I must have de bienséance, de courtesie to hin. [Aside.] Très bien, monsieur officier. I shall come down instain ment. How I am broke of my sleep! Heigho !
(Exit from window. Usef. So far so good ; let me but once effect an entrance, l'll soon accomplish all the rest. Eh! here old soup-meagre comes. Enter MORBLEU from the house, sneezing, as if from having
newly caught cold. Mor. Now, monsieur officier, sare, I am at your com. mand, if you think so good, bonne grace.
Usef. I merely called, Mr. Morbleu, to enquire
Mor. Yes, sare.
Mor. Diable ! vat you mean, sare? you dam scoundrel ! by come again ? Vat you mean by Monsieur Tonson, to break my sleep in dis manner. I told you two, one, seven time, dere no Monsieur Tonson here. I know no Monsieur Tonson. Got dam !
Usef. Well, but my good friend, you needn't be in such a passion ; if you don't know where Mr. Thompson lives, I dare say Miss Morbleu does, if you'll just have the goodness to call her up; or your servant will do—the housekeeper-or anybody.
Mor. Parblen ! dis worse than all ! You not content vit pull me out of my bed dese tree time, vit your dam Monsieur Tonson ; but now you vant to pull my vard, Mademoiselle Adolphine, and my housekeeper, Madame Bellegarde, out of bed, too. Vat dey know about Monsieur Tonson? You use me très mauvais; I never vas use so under de ancien régime, ma foi : it affront my honneur ; I shall not put up vit it; I will have de satisfaction-I shall give you to de vash - I shall make a charge of you. Monsieur Vash! [Calls.] He shall put you in his box. Mousieur Vash!
(Calling. Usef. Eh! calling the watch ?' Zounds! I may get in the wrong box here; I'd better be off. Bong swor, Mounseer Soapsuds.
(Exit, R. Mor. Run away? Begar! I am sorry I did not run him troo. But he shall not get off so vell : Monsieur Vash! Monsieur Vash, I say!
[Calling Enter Nap, L. Nap. Eh! who wants the watch ? here I am : why, hang me! if it 'en't Mounseer Powder-blue, the barber. What's in the wind now? Consarn it! I hope there hasn't been no rogues breaking in and running away with the pomatum, has there?
Mor. Vorse dan dat, Monsieur Vash. I no mind de pomatum r'un avay dis hot veader; but dat dam Monsieur Tonson run avay, too.
Nap. Eh! Mounseer Townsend ! who's he?
Mor. Oh! by gar! me no know; me no vant to know. He comes here seven, two, tree time, and pull me out of my bed ; besides knock my door down; and now I will have him knock down, von dam rascal ! you shall vash
hiin veu he come again, and I shall give you him to keep for ever, and lock him in your house, Monsieur Vash ; in your dam black hole, vere you live.
Nap. Why, now you speak of it, mounseer, I think I knows the rascal. Isn't this here Townsend a wery illlooking fellow?
Mor. Oh! très mauvais, très mauvais, nasty fellow, great blagnard; me never saw no man me like to see vorse : he come here to inquire after his relation, ma foi ! but me no be cozen in dat vay. I shall charge-by gar! I shall charge-charge him vit you, Monsieur Vash.
Nap. You can't do better : I'll take care of hiin, moun.
Mor. Dat is right; you need not be fear, I have been great général, and I shall help you ; yes, ven they come I shall
Nap. Why, here they are —
Mor. Get behind the door : you can lay avait till dey mention dere name, aud den ve vill rush out togeder, break dere neck several times, stop dere mout very often, knock denn down, and lock dem up. Nap. Good, very good, mounseer ; l'll do it. Away
[Exeunt Morbleu into the house, Nap into boa. Enter THOMPSON and Rusty, followed by TRAP and
WANTEM, L. Thom. Now, my good fellows, you know what you have to do ; this is the house.
Trap. Ay, ay, ve’rc Ay, master. We will do the right thing, depend on't.
Thom. Insist on seeing the lady.
Thom. Knock at the door at once and never fear but you'll be properly rewarded. Come, Rusty, let us look Stand aside, stand aside!
[Rusty and Thompson stand aside R. Trap. Now, Master Wantem, you tattle the tell-tale, aud I'll open the business. Want. Ay and I'll knock. [Knocks at Morbleu's door.
Enter MORBLEU, from house. Mor. Vell, vat you vant ? Vat make you here at such late hour, if I am so bold ?
Trap. We've a small bit of business with you, moun