King. More measure of this measure; be not nice. Ros. We can afford no more at such a price. King, Prize you yourselves; What buys your company? Ros. King. Your absence only. That can never be. Pes. Then cannot we be bought and so adieu; Twice to your visor, and half once to you! Kiag. If you deny to dance, let's hold more chat. Ras. In private then. King I am best pleas'd with that. [They converse apart. Biron. White-handed mistress, one sweet word with thee. Prin. Honey, and milk, and sugar; there is three. Biron. Nay then, two treys, (an if you grow so nice,) Metheglin, wort, and malmsey ; — Well, run, dice! There's half a dozen sweets. As much in private, and I'll bid adieu. [They converse apart. Kath. What, was your visor made without a tongue? Long. I know the reason, lady, why you ask. Kath. O, for your reason! quickly, sir; I long. Long. You have a double tongue within your mask, And would afford my speechless visor half. King. Farewell, mad wenches; you have simple wits. [Exeunt KING, Lords, MoтH, Musick, and Attendants. Prin. Twenty adieus, my frozen Muscovites. Are these the breed of wits so wonder'd at ' Boyet. Tapers they are, with your sweet breaths puff'd out. Ros. Well-liking wits they have; gross, gross; fat, fat. Prin. O poverty in wit, kingly-poor flout! Will they not, think you, hang themselves to night? Or ever, but in visors, show their faces? This pert Birón was out of countenance quite. Ros. O they were all in lamentable cases! The king was weeping-ripe for a good word. Prin. Birón did swear himself out of all suit. Mar. Dumain was at my service, and his sword: No point, quoth I; my servant straight was mute. Kath. Lord Longaville said, I came o'er his heart; And trow you, what he call'd me? Prin. Kath. Yes, in good faith. Prin. Qualm, perhaps. Go, sickness as thou art! Ros. Well, better wits have worn plain statutecaps. But will you hear? the king is my love sworn. In their own shapes; for it can never be, Boyet. They will, they will, God knows, And leap for joy, though they are lame with blows: Therefore, change favours; and, when they repair, Blow like sweet roses in this summer air. Prin. How blow? how blow? speak to be under stood. Boyet. Fair ladies, mask'd, are roses in their bud: Dismask'd, their damask sweet commixture shown, Are angels vailing clouds, or roses blown. Prin. Avaunt, perplexity! What shall we do, King. Veal, quoth the Dutchman; - Is not veal If they return in their own shapes to woo? a calf? Long. A calf, fair lady? Kath. No, a fair lord calf. Lang. Let's part the word. Kath. No, I'll not be your half: Take all, and wean it; it may prove an ox. Lang. Look, how you butt yourself in these sharp mocks! Will you give horns, chaste lady? do not so. Kath. Then die a calf, before your horns do grow. Long. One word in private with you, ere I die. Kath. Bleat softly then, the butcher hears you cry. [They converse apart. Boyet. The tongues of mocking wenches are as keen As is the razor's edge invisible, Cutting a smaller hair than may be seen; Above the sense of sense: so sensible Seemeth their conference; their conceits have wings, Fleeter than arrows, bullets, wind, thought, swifter things. Res. Not one word more, my maids; break off, break off. Biron. By heaven, all dry-beaten with pure scoff: Ros. Good madam, if by me you'll be advis'd, Let's mock them still, as well known, as disguis'd: Let us complain to them what fools were here, Disguis'd like Muscovites, in shapeless gear; And wonder, what they were; and to what end Their shallow shows, and prologue vilely penn'd, And their rough carriage so ridiculous, Should be presented at our tent to us. Boyet. Ladies, withdraw: the gallants are at hand. Prin. Whip to our tents, as roes run over land. [Exeunt PRINCESS, Ros. KATH. and MARIA. Enter the KING, BIRON, LONGAVILLE, and DUMAIN, in their proper habis. King. Fair sir, God save you! Where is the princess? Boyet. Gone to her tent: Please it your majesty, Command me any service to her thither? King. That she vouchsafe me audience for one word. Boyet. I will; and so will she, I know, my lord. [Exit. Biron. This fellow pecks up wit, as pigeons peas; And utters it again when God doth please: He is wit's pedler; and retails his wares King. A blister on his sweet tongue, with my heart, That put Armado's page out of his part! Biron. See where it comes! - Behaviour, what wert thou, Till this man show'd thee? and what art thou now? King. All hail, sweet madam, and fair time of day! Prin. Fair, in all hail, is foul, as I conceive. King. Construe my speeches better, if you may. Prin. Then wish me better, I will give you leave. King. We came to visit you; and purpose now To lead you to our court: vouchsafe it then. Prin. This field shall hold me; and so hold your VOW: Nor God, nor I, delight in perjur'd men. King. Rebuke me not for that which you provoke: The virtue of your eye must break my oath. Prin. You nick-name virtue: vice you should have spoke; For virtue's office never breaks men's troth. Now, by my maiden honour, yet as pure As the unsullied lily, I protest, A world of torments though I should endure, I would not yield to be your house's guest: So much I hate a breaking-cause to be Of heavenly oaths, vow'd with integrity. King. O, you have liv'd in desolation here, Unseen, unvisited, much to our shame. Prin. Not so, my lord, it is not so, I swear; We have had pastimes here, and pleasant game; A mess of Russians left us but of late. King. How, madam? Russians? Prin. Ay, in truth, my lord; Trim gallants, full of courtship, and of state. Ros. Madam, speak true: — It is not so my lord; My lady (to the manner of the days,) In courtesy, gives undeserving praise. We four, indeed, confronted here with four In Russian habit; here they staid an hour, And talk'd apace; and in that hour, my lord, They did not bless us with one happy word. I dare not call them fools; but this I think, When they are thirsty, fools would fain have drink. Biron. This jest is dry to me.-Fair, gentle sweet, Your wit makes wise things foolish; when we greet With eyes best seeing heaven's fiery eye, By light we lose light: Your capacity Is of that nature, that to your huge store Wise things seem foolish, and rich things but poor. Ros. This proves you wise and rich, for in my eye, Biron. I am a fool, and full of poverty. Ros. But that you take what doth to you belong, It were a fault to snatch words from my tongue. Biron. O, I am yours, and all that I possess. Ros. All the fool mine? Biron. I cannot give you less. Ros. Which of the visors was it, that you wore? Biron. Where? when? what visor? why demand you this? Ros. There, then, that visor; that superfluous case, That hid the worse, and show'd the better face. King. We are descried: they'll mock us now downright. Dum. Let us confess, and turn it to a jest. Prin. Amaz'd, my lord? Why looks your highness sad? Kos. Help, hold his brows! he'll swoon? Why look you pale? Sea-sick, I think, coming from Muscovy. jury. Can any face of brass hold longer out? Here stand I, lady; dart thy skill at me; Bruise me with scorn, confound me with a flout Thrust thy sharp wit quite through my ignorance; Cut me to pieces with thy keen conceit; And I will wish thee never more to dance, Nor never more in Russian habit wait. O! never will I trust to speeches penn'd, Nor to the motion of a school-boy's tongue; Nor never come in visor to my friend; Nor woo in rhyme, like a blind harper's song Taffata phrases, silken terms precise, Three-pil'd hyperboles, spruce affectation, Figures pedantical; these summer-flies Have blown me full of maggot ostentation : I do forswear them: and I here protest, By this white glove, (how white the hand, Go Henceforth my wooing mind shall be express'd Yet I have a trick bear with me, I am sick; I'll leave it by degress. Soft, let us see; Write, Lord have mercy on us, on those three ; They are infected, in their hearts it lies; They have the plague, and caught it of your eyes: These lords are visited; you are not free, For the Lord's tokens on you do I see. Prin. No, they are free, that gave these token to us. Biron. Our states are forfeit, seek not to undo u Ros. It is not so; For how can this be true, That you stand forfeit, being those that sue? Biron. Peace; for I will not have to do with you Ros. Nor shall not, if I do as I intend. Biron. Speak for yourselves, my wit is at an en King. Teach us, sweet madam, for our rud transgression Some fair excuse. Prin. The fairest is confession. Were you not here, but even now, disguis’d? King. Madam, I was. Prin. And were you well advis'd King. I was, fair madam. Pria. When you then were here, What did you whisper in your lady's ear? King. That more than all the world I did respect her. Pria. When she shall challenge this, you will reject her. King. Upon mine honour, no. Prin. Peace, peace, forbear; Your oath once broke, you force not to forswear. King. Despise me, when I break this oath of mine. Pria. I will: and therefore keep it :- Rosaline, What did the Russian whisper in your ear? Ra Madam, he swore that he did hold me dear As precious eye-sight; and did value me Above this world: adding thereto, moreover, That he would wed me, or else die my lover. Pria. God give thee joy of him! the noble lord Most honourably doth uphold his word. King. What mean you, madam? by my life, my troth, I never swore this lady such an oath. Rat. By heaven you did; and to confirm it plain, You gave me this: but take it, sir, again. King. My faith, and this, the princess I did give; I knew her by this jewel on her sleeve. Pria. Pardon me, sir, this jewel did she wear; And lord Birón, I thank him, is my dear : What; will you have me, or your pearl again? Biren. Neither of either; I remit both twain. I see the trick on't;- Here was a consent, (Knowing aforehand of our merriment,) To dash it like a Christmas comedy: Some carry-tale, some please-man, some slight zany, Some mumble-news, some trencher-knight, some Dick, That smiles his cheek in years; and knows the trick Bayet. done. Cost. O Lord, sir, it were pity you should get your living by reckoning, sir. Biron. How much is it? Cost. O Lord, sir, the parties themselves, the actors, sir, will show whereuntil it doth amount: for my own part, I am, as they say, but to parfect one man, e'en one poor man; Pompion the great, sir. Biron. Art thou one of the worthies? Cost. It pleased them, to think me worthy of Pompion the great: for mine own part, I know not the degree of the worthy; but I am to stand for him. Biron. Go, bid them prepare. some care. Cost. We will turn it finely off, sir; we will take [Exit COSTARD. King. Biron, they will shame us, let them not approach. Biron. We are shame-proof, my lord: and 'tis some policy To have one show worse than the king's and his company. King. I say, they shall not come. Prin. Nay, my good lord, let me o'er-rule you now: That sport best pleases, that doth least know how: Enter ARMADO. Arm. Anointed, I implore so much expence of thy royal sweet breath, as will utter a brace of words. [ARMADO converses with the KING, and delivers him a paper. Prin. Doth this man serve God? Prin. He speaks not like a man of God's making. Arm. That's all one, my fair, sweet, honey monarch: for, I protest, the school master is exceeding fantastical; too, too vain; too, too vain; But we will put it, as they say, to fortuna della guerra. I wish you the peace of mind, most royal couple[Exit ARMADO. ment ! King. Here is like to be a good presence of worthies: He presents Hector of Troy; the swain, Pompey the great; the parish curate, Alexander; Armado's page, Hercules; the pedant, Judas Ma chabæus. And if these four worthies in their first show thrive, These four will change habits, and present the other five. Biron. There is five in the first show. King. You are deceiv'd, 'tis not so. Biron. The pedant, the braggart, the hedgepriest, the fool and the boy: Abate a throw at novum; and the whole world again, Cannot prick out five such, take each one in his vein. King. The ship is under sail, and here she comes amain. [Seats brought for the KING, PRINCESS, &c. Biron. Well said, old mocker; I must needs be friends with thee. Cost. I Pompey am, Pompey surnam'd the big, Cost. It is great, sir ;-Pompey surnam’d the great ; That oft in field, with targe and shield, did make my foe to sweat: And travelling along this coast, I here am come by chance; And lay my arms before the legs of this sweet lass of France. If your ladyship would say, Thanks, Pompey, I had done. Prin. Great thanks, great Pompey. Cost. 'Tis not so much worth; but, I hope, I was perfect: I made a little fault in, great. Biron. My hat to a halfpenny, Pompey proves the best worthy. Enter NATHANIEL arm'd, for Alexander. Nath. When in the world I liv'd, I was the world's commander; By east, west, north, and south, I spread my conquering might: My 'scutcheon plain declares, that I am Alisander. Boyet. Your nose says, no, you are not; for it stands too right. Biron. Your nose smells, no, in this, most tender Cost. O, sir, [to NATH.] you have overthrown Alisander the conqueror! You will be scraped out of the painted cloth for this: your lion, that holds his poll-ax sitting on a close stool, will be given to A-jax he will be the ninth worthy. A conqueror, and afeard to speak! run away for shame, Alisander. [NATH. retires.] There, an't shall please you; a foolish mild man ; an honest man, look you, and soon dash'd! He is a marvellous good neighbour, insooth; and a very good bowler: but, for Alisander, alas, you see, how 'tis ; ;-a little o'erparted: - But there are worthies a coming will speak their mind in some other sort. Prin. Stand aside, good Pompey. Enter HOLOFERNES, arm'd, for Judas, and MOTH arm'd, for Hercules. Hol. Great Hercules is presented by this imp, Whose club kill' d Cerberus, that three-headed canus; And, when he was a babe, a child, a shrimp, Thus did he strangle serpents in his manus: Quoniam, he seemeth in minority; Ergo, I come with this apology. Keep some state in thy erit, and vanish. [Exit MoTH. Hol. Judas, I am, - Hol. Judas, I am, — Dum. The more shame for you, Judas. Boyet. To make Judas hang himself. Biron. Well follow'd: Judas was hang'd on an elder. Hol. I will not be put out of countenance. Dum. The head of a bodkin. Long. The face of an old Roman coin, scarce seen. Biron. Ay, and worn in the cap of a tooth-drawer: And now, forward; for we have put thee in coun tenance. Hol. You have put me out of countenance. Hol. But you have out-fac'd them all. Biron. For the ass to the Jude; give it him : — Jud-as, away. Hol. This is not generous, not gentle; not humble. Boyet. A light for monsieur Judas: it grows dark, he may stumble. Prin. Alas, poor Machabæus, how hath he been baited! Enter ARMADO, arm'd, for Hector. Biron. Hide thy head, Achilles; here comes Hector in arms. Dum. Though my mocks come home by me, I will now be merry. King. Hector was but a Trojan in respect of this. Boyet. But is this Hector? Dum. I think, Hector was not so clean-timbered. Long. His leg is too big for Hector. Dum. More calf, certain. Boyet. No; he is best indued in the small. Dum. He's a god or a painter; for he makes faces. Arm. The armipotent Mars, of lances the almighty Gave Hector a gift, Dum. A gilt nutmeg. Biron. A lemon. Long. Stuck with cloves. Dum. No, cloven, Arm. Peace! Long. I must rather give it the rein, for it runs inst Hector. Dum. Ay, and Hector's a greyhound. Arm. The sweet war-man is dead and rotten; wat chucks, beat not the bones of the buried: then be breath'd, he was a man-But I will forward with my device: Sweet royalty, [to the PRINCESS.] bestow on me the sense of hearing. [BIRON whispers COSTARD. Pria Speak, brave Hector: we are much de- Arm. I do adore thy sweet grace's slipper. Dum. He may not by the yard. - Arm This Hector far surmounted Hannibal, Ct. The party is gone, fellow Hector, she is gone; she is two months on her way. Arm. What meanest thou? Cost. Faith, unless you play the honest Trojan, the poor wench is cast away: she's quick; the child bags in her belly already; tis yours. Arm. Dost thou infamonize me among potentates? Cost. Then shall Hector be whipp'd, for Jaquebeta that is quick by him; and hang'd, for Pompey that is dead by him. Dam. Most rare Pompey ! Beget. Renowned Pompey! I have seen the day of wrong through the little hole King. How fares your majesty? For all your fair endeavours; and entreat, King. The extreme parts of time extremely form The holy suit which fain it would convince; From what it purpos'd; since, to wail friends lost, Biren. Greater than great, great, great, great Is not by much so wholesome, profitable, Dam. Hector trembles. Pompey is mov'd:- More Ates, more Ates; stir them on! stir them on! Dym. Hector will challenge him. As to rejoice at friends but newly found. Prin. I understand you not; my griefs are double. Biron. Honest plain words best pierce the ear of grief; And by these badges understand the king. Biren. Ay, if he have no more man's blood in's For your fair sakes have we neglected time, belly than will sup a flea. drm. By the north pole, I do challenge thee. Dan. Room for the incensed worthies. Du Most resolute Pompey! I Arm. Gentlemen, and soldiers, pardon me; Arm. Sweet bloods, I both may and will. Buget. True, and it was enjoin'd him in Rome for wast of linen: since when, I'll be sworn, he wore one, but a dish-clout of Jaquenetta's; and that 'a wars next his heart, for a favour. Enter MERCADE. Mer. God save you, madam! Pria. Welcome, Mercade; But that thou interrupt'st our merriment. Mer. I am sorry, madam; for the news I bring, Mer. Even so; my tale is told. Buren. Worthies, away; the scene begins to cloud. Play'd foul play with our oaths; your beauty, ladies, -- Prin. We have receiv'd your letters, full of love; In their own fashion, like a merriment. Dum. Our letters, madam, show'd much more than jest. Long. So did our looks. Ros. We did not quote them so. King. Now, at the latest minute of the hour, Grant us your loves. |