cure.1

If the patient and the disease join, then down goes the physician; for he is discredited.

265. (185.) Alexander visited Diogenes in his tub. And when he asked him; What he would desire of him? Diogenes answered; That you would stand a little aside, that the sun may come to me.

† 266. Diogenes said of a young man that danced daintily, and was much commended; The better, the

worse.

267. (236.) Diogenes called an ill musician, Cock. Why? (saith he.) Diogenes answered; Because when you crow men use to rise.

268. (188.) Heraclitus the Obscure said; The dry light was the best soul. Meaning, when the faculties intellectual are in vigour, not wet, nor,2 as it were, blooded by the affections.

†269. There was in Oxford a cowardly fellow that was a very good archer. He was abused grossly by another, and moaned himself to Walter Ralegh, then a scholar, and asked his advice; What he should do to repair the wrong had been offered him? Ralegh answered; Why, challenge him at a match of shooting.

270. (100.) Whitehead, a grave divine, was much esteemed by Queen Elizabeth, but not preferred, because he was against the government of Bishops. He was of a blunt stoical nature. He came one day to the Queen, and the Queen happened to say to him; I like thee the better, Whitehead, because thou livest unmarried. He answered again; In troth, Madam, I like you the worse for the same cause.

1 If the physician and the disease join, that is a strong disease; and the physician mistaking the cure, then, &c. R.

2 not drenched, or. R.

8 This sentence is omitted in R.

† 271. There was a nobleman that was lean of visage, but immediately after his marriage he grew pretty plump and fat. One said to him, Your lordship doth contrary to other married men; for they at the first wax lean, and you wax fat. Sir Walter Ralegh stood by and said; Why, there is no beast, that if you take him from the common and put him into the several, but he will wax fat.

† 272. Diogenes seeing one that was a bastard casting stones among the people, bade him Take heed he hit not his father.

273. (97.) Dr. Laud1 said; That some hypocrites and seeming mortified men, that held down their heads, were like little images that they place in the very bowing of the vaults of churches, that look as if they held up the church, but are but puppets.2

274. (104.) It was said among some of the grave prelates of the council of Trent, in which the schooldivines bore the sway; That the school-men were like the astronomers; who to save the phenomena, framed to their conceit eccentrics and epicycles, and a wonderful engine of orbs, though no such things were: so they, to save the practice of the church, had devised a number of strange positions.

† 275. It was also said by many, concerning the canons of that council; That we are beholding to Aristotle for many articles of our faith.

276. (35.) The Lo. Henry Howard, being Lord Privy Seal, was asked by the King openly at the table, (where commonly he entertained the King,) 1 The Lord Archbishop Laud. R.

2 were like the little images in the vaults or roofs of churches, which look and bow down as if they held up the church, when as they bear no weight at all. R.

upon the sudden;1 My lord, have you not a desire to see Rome? My lord Privy Seal answered, Yes, indeed, Sir. The King said, And why? My lord answered, Because, and it please your Majesty, it was once the seat of the greatest monarchy, and the seminary of the bravest men in the world, amongst the heathen: and then again, because after it was the see of so many holy Bishops in the primitive church, most of them martyrs. The King would not give it over, but said; And for nothing else? My lord answered; Yes, and it please your Majesty, for two things especially. The one, to see him, who they say hath such a power to forgive other men's sins, to confess his own sins upon his knees before a chaplain or priest; and the other is, to hear Antichrist say his creed.

277. (235.) There was a nobleman said of a great counsellor; That he would have made the worst farrier in the world, for he never shod horse but he cloyed him: so he never commended any man to the King for service, or upon occasion of suit, or otherwise, but that he would come in in the end with a But, and drive in a nail to his disadvantage.

† 278. There was a lady of the west country, that gave great entertainment at her house to most of the gallant gentlemen thereabout; and amongst others, Sir Walter Ralegh was one. This lady, though otherwise a stately dame, was a notable good housewife ; and in the morning betimes she called to one of her maids that looked to the swine, and asked; Is the piggy

1 The same Earl of Northampton, then Lord Privy Seal, was asked by King James openly at the table, where commonly he entertained the King with discourse; the King asked him upon the sudden. R.

2 secondly. R.

8 for two things more. R.

served? Sir Walter Ralegh's chamber was fast by the lady's, so as he heard her. A little before dinner, the lady came down in great state into the great chamber, which was full of gentlemen: And as soon as Sir Walter Ralegh set eye upon her; Madam, (saith he) is the piggy serv'd? The lady answered, You know best whether you have had your breakfast.

279. (237.) There was a gentleman fell very sick, and a friend of his said to him; Surely, you are in danger; I pray send for pray send for a physician. But the sick man answered; It is no matter, for if I die, I will die at leisure.

280. (193.) There was an Epicurean vaunted, that divers of other sects of philosophers did after turn Epicureans, but there was never any Epicurean that turned to any other sect. Whereupon a philosopher that was of another sect, said; The reason was plain, for that cocks may be made capons, but capons could never be made cocks.

APOPHTHEGMS

CONTAINED IN THE SECOND EDITION OF THE RESUSCITATIO (1661), AND NOT IN THE ORIGINAL COLLECTION.1

3. His Majesty James the First, King of Great Britain, having made unto his Parliament an excellent and large declaration, concluded thus: I have now given you a clear mirror of my mind; use it therefore like a mirror; and take heed how you let it fall, or how you soil it with your breath.

5. His Majesty said to his Parliament at another time, finding there were some causeless jealousies sown amongst them; That the King and his people, (whereof the Parliament is the representative body,) were as husband and wife; and therefore that of all other things jealousy was between them most pernicious.

6. His Majesty, when he thought his counsel mought note in him some variety in businesses, though indeed he remained constant, would say; That the sun many times shineth watery; but it is not the sun which causeth it, but some cloud rising betwixt us and the sun : and when that is scattered, the sun is as it was, and comes to his former brightness.

7. His Majesty, in his answer to the book of the Cardinal of Evereux, (who had in a grave argument

1 See Preface, pp. 315, 320.