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No. 422.] Friday, July 4, 1712.

made a fool by his own consent, and not exDæc scripsi non otii abundantiâ, sed amoris ergate.

posed as such whether he will or no. I take Tul. Epist.

. it therefore, that to make raillery agreea.

ble, a man must either know he is rallied, I have written this, not out of the abundance of leisure

or think never the worse of himself if he sees but of my affection towards you.

he is. I do not know any thing which gives greater Acetus is of a quite contrary genius, and is disturbance to conversation, than the false no- more generally admired than Callisthenes, but tion which people have of raillery. It ought, pot with justice. Acetus has no regard to be certainly, to be the first point to be aimed at modesty or weakness of the person he rallies ; in society, to gain the good-will of those with but if his quality or humility gives him any whom you converse; the way to that is, to superiority of the man he would fall upon, he show you are well inclined towards them. has no mercy in making the onset. He can What then can be more absurd, than to set up be pleased to see his best friends out of counfor being extremely sharp and biting, as the tenance, while the laugh is loud in his owR term is, in your expressions to your families ? applause. His raillery always puts the comA man who has no good quality but courage, pany into little divisions and separate interis in a very ill way towards making an agree-ests, while that of Callisthenes cements it, and able figure in the world, because that which makes every man not only better pleased with he has superior to other people cannot be ex- himself, but also with all the rest in the conerted without raising himself an enemy. Your versation. gentleman of a satirical vein is in the like To rally well, it is absolutely necessary that condition. To say a thing which perplexes kindness must run through all you say; and the heart of him you speak to, or brings blush- you must ever preserve the character of a es into his face, is a degree of murder; and it friend to support your pretensions to be free is, I think, an unpardonable offence to show a with a man. Acetus ought to be banished man you do not care whether he is pleased human society, because he raises his mirtb or displeased But won't you then take a upon giving pain to the person upon whom jest?-Yes: but pray let it be a jest. It is he is pleasant. Nothing but the malevolence no jest to put me, who am so unhappy as to which is too general towards those who exbave an utter aversion to speaking to more cel could make his company tolerated; but than one man at a time, under a nescessity they with whom he converses are sure to to explain myself in much company, and re- see some man sacraficed wherever he is ad. ducing me to shame and derision, except I minted; and all the credit he has for wit, is perform what my infirmity of silence disables owing to the gratification it gives to other me to do.

men's ill-nature. Callisthenes has great wit accompanied with Minutius has a wit that conciliates a man's that quality without which a man can have no love, at the same time that it is exerted against wit at all-a sound judgment. This gentle-his faults. He has an art of keeping the perman rallies the best of any man I know: for he son he rallies in countenance, by insinuating forms his ridicule upon a circumstance which that he himself is guilty of the same imper you are in your heart pot unwilling to grant fection. This he does with so much address, bim ; to wit, that you are guilty of an excess that he seems rather to bewail himself, than in something which is in itself laudable. He fall upon his friend. very well understands what you would be, and It is really monstrous to see how unaccounneeds not fear your anger, for declaring tably it prevails among men, to take the liberty you are a little too much that thing. The of displeasing each other. One would think generous will bear being reproached as la- sometimes that the contention is, who shall be vish, and the valiant as rash, without being most disagreeable. Allusions to pasi follies, provoked to resentment against their moni- hints which revive what a man has a mind to tor. What has been said to be a mark ot forget for ever, and desires that all the rest a good writer will fall in with the character of the world should, are commonly brought of a good companion. The good writer forth even in company of men of distinction. makes his reader better pleased with him- They do not thrust with the skill of fencers, self, and the agreeable man makes his friends but cut up with the barbarity of butchers. It enjoy themselves, rather than him, while he is, methinks, below the character of men of is in their company. Callisthenes does this humanity and good-manners to be capable with inimitable pleasantry. He whispered a of mirth while there is any of the company friend the other day so as to be overheard in pain and disorder. They who have the by a young officer who gave symptoms of cock-true taste of conversation, enjoy themselves ing upon the company, That gentleman has in communication of each other's excellenvery much the air of a general officer.' The cies, and not in a triumph over their imperyouth immediately put on a composed beha- fections, Fortius would have been reckonviour, and behaved himself suitably to the ed a wit, if there had never been a fool in the conceptions he believed the company had of world: he wants not foils to be a beauty, him It is to be allowed that Callisthenes will but has that natural pleasure in observing make a man run into impertinent relations perfection in others, that his own faults are to his own advantage, and express the satis- overlooked out of gratitude by all his acfaction he has in his own dear self, till he is quaintance. very ridiculous; but in this case the man is! After these several characters of men who

succeed or fail in raillery, it inay not be amissing. “ Damon," said he, with a deep sigh, to reflect a little further what one takes to be “I have long languished for that miracle of the most agreeable kind of it; and that to me beauty, Gloriana ; and if you will be very appears when the satire is directed against steadfastly my rival, I shall certainly obtain vice, with an air of contempt of the fault, her. Do not," continued be, “ be offended but no ill will to the criminal. Mr. Congreve's at this overture ; for I go upon the knowledge Doris is a master piece in this kind. It is the of the temper of the woman, rather than any character of a woman utterly abandoned ; vanity that I should profit by any opposition of but her impudence, by the finest piece of your pretensions to those of your humble serraillery, is made only generosity.

vant. Gloriana has very good sense, a quick * Peculiar therefore is her way,

relish of the satisfactions of life, and will not Whether by nature taught

give herself, as the crowd of women do, to the I shall not undertake to say,

arms of a man to whom she is indifferent. As Or by experience bought;

she is a sensible woman, expressions of rapFor who o'ernight obtain'd her grace

ture and adoration will not move her neither: She can next day disown,

but he that has her must be the object of her And stare upon the strange man's face, As one sbe ne'er had known.

desire, not her pity. The way to this end I . So well she can the truth disguise

take to be, that a man's general conduct Such artful wonder frame,

should be agreeable, without addressing in The lover or distrusts his eyes,

particular to the woman he loves. Now, sir, Or thinks 'twas all a dream.

if you will be so kind as to sigh and die for • Some censure this as lowd or low,

Gloriana, I will carry it with great respect
Who are to bounty blind;
But to forget what we bestow

towards her, but seem void of any thoughts as Bespeaks a noble mind.'

| a lover. By this means I shall be in the most

amiable light of which I am capable; I shall No. 423.] Saturday, July 5, 1712.

be received with freedom, you with reserve."

Damon who has bimself no designs of mar, Nuper idoneus.

riage at all, easily fell into the scheme; and Hor. Ud. xxvi. Lib 3. 1.

you may observe, that wherever you are, DaOace fit myself.

mon appears also. You see he carries on an I LOOK upon myself as a kind of guardian to unaffected exactness in his dress and manner, the fair, and am always watchful to observe and strives also to be the very cuntrary of any thing which conceros their interest. The Strephon. They have already succeeded so present paper shall be employed in the ser- far, that your eyes are ever in search of Strevice of a very fine young woman; and the ad-phon, and turn themselves of course from Damonitions I give her may not be unuseful to the mon. They meet and compare notes upon rest of her sex. Gloriana shall be the name of your carriage; and the letter which was the heroine in to-days entertainment; and brought to you the other day was a contriwhen I have told you that she is rich, witty, vance to remark your resentment. When you young and beautiful, you will believe she does saw the billet subscribed Damon, and turned not want admirers. She has had, since she away with a scornful air, and cried "impera came to town, about twenty-five of those loverstinence !" you gave hopes to him that shuns. who made their addresses by way of jointure you, without mortifying him that languishes, and settlement: these come and go with great for you. indifference on both sides; and as beautiful as "What I am concerned for, madam, is, that she is, a line in a deed has had exception in the disposal of your heart, you should enough against it to outweigh the lustre of her know what you are doing, and examine it eyes, the readiness of her understanding, and before it is lost. Strephon contradicts you in the merit of her general character. But discourse with the civility of one who has a vaamong the crowd of such cool adorers, she lue for you, but gives up notbing like one that has two who are very assiduqus in their at- loves you. This seeming unconcern gives his tendance. There is something so extraordi- behaviour the advantage of sincerity, and innary and artful in their manner of application, sensibly obtains your good opinion by appear. that I think it but common justice to alarming disinterested in the purchase of it. If you her in it. I have dosphát in the following let- watch these correspondents hereafter, you will ter:

find that Strephon makes his visit of civility “MADAM,

immediately after Damon has tired you with 'I have for some time taken notice of two one of love. Though you are very discreet, gentlemen who attend you in all public places, you will find it no easy matter to eseape the both of whom have also easy access to you at toils so well laid; as, when one studies to be your own house. The matter is adjusted be- disagreeable in passion, the other to be pleas. tween them; and Damon, who so passionately ing withont it. All the turns of your temper addresses you, has no design upon you ; but are carefully watched, and their quick and Strephon, who seems to be indifferent to you, faithful intelligence gives your lovers irresisis the man who is, as they have settled it, to tible advantage. You will please, madam, to have you. The plot was laid over a bottle of be upon your guard, and take all the neceswine ; and Strephon, when he first thought of sary precautions against one who is amiable you, proposed to Damon to be his rival. The to you before you know he is enamoured. manner of his breaking of it to him, I was so

"I am, Madam, placed at a tavern, that I could not avoid hear

• Your most obedient servant.' VOL II

19

Strephon makes great progress in this lady's of good-humour as they can ; for though a good graces; for most women being actuated country life is described as the most pleasant by some little spirit of pride and contradic. of all others, and though it may in truth be so, tion, he has the good effects of both those yet it is so only to those who know how to enmotives by this covert way of courtship. He joy leisure and retirement. received a message vesterday from Damon in " As for those who cannot live without the the following words, superscribed • With constant helps of business or company, let speed.'

them consider, that in the country there is

no Exchange, there are no play houses, no va* All goes well; she is very angry at me, riety of coffee-houses, nor many of those and I dare say hates me in earnest. It is a other amusements which serve here as so good time to visit.

Yours.' many reliefs from the repeated occurences in

their own families; but that there the greatest The comparison of Stephon's gayety to Da-part of their time must be spent within theminon's languishment strikes her imagination selves, and consequently it behoves them to with a prospect of very agreeable hours with consider how agreeable it will be to them besuch a man as the former, and abhorrence of fore they leave this dear town. the insipid prospect with one like the latter.

I remember Mr. Spectator, we were very To know when a lady is displeased with an-well entertained last year, with the advices other, is to know the best time of advancing you gave us from Sir Roger's country-seat; yourself. This method of two persons playing which I the rather mention, because it is alinto each others hand is so dangerous, that I most impossible not to live pleasantly, where cannot tell how a woman could be able to the master of the family is such a one as you withstand such a siege. The condition of there describe your friend, who cannot thereGloriana I am afraid is irretrievable; for Stre-fore, (I mean as to his domestic character) phon has bad so many opportunities of pleas- be too often recommended to the imitation of ing without suspicion, that all which is left for others. How aimable is that affability and her to do is to bring him, now she is advised, benevolence with which he treats his neighto an explanation of his passion, aud begin- bours, and every one, even the meanest of his ping again, if she can conquer the kind sen- own family! and yet how seldom imitated ! timents she has conceived for him. When one Tostead of which we commonly meet with illshows himself a creature to be avoided, the natured expostulations, noise, and chidings. other proper to be fled to for succour, they And this I hinted, because the humour and dishave the whole woman between them, and can position of tbe head is what chiefly influences oceasionally rebound her love and hatred all the other parts of a family. from one to the other, in such a manner as to "An agreement and kind correspondence keep her at a distance from all the rest of the between friends and acquaintance is the greatworld, and cast lots for the conquest.

est pleasure of life. This is an undoubted N. B. I have many other secrets which con- truth; and yet any man who judges from the cern the empire of love, but I consider, that, practice of the world will be almost persuaded while I alarm my women, I instruct my men. to believe the contrary ; for how can we sup

T.

| pose people should be so industrious to make

themselves uneasy ? What can engage them No. 424.] Monday, July 7, 1712.

to entertain and foment jealousies of one an

other upon every the least occasion ? Yet so it Est Ulubris, animus si te non deficit æquus.

Hor. Ep. xi. Lib. 1. 30. is, there are people who (as it should seem)

delight in being troublesome and vexatious, "Tis not the place disgurt or pleasure brings:

who (as Tully speaks) Mirâ sunt alacritate ad From our own mind our satisfaction springe.

litigandum, have a certain cheerfulness in * MR. SPECTATOR, London, June 24. wrangling. And thus it happens, that there • A man who bas it in his power to choose are very few families in which there are not his own company, would certainly be much to feuds and animosities; though it is every one's blame, should he not, to the best of his judg- interest, there more particularly, to avoid ment, take such as are of a temper most suit- them, because there (as I would willingly able to his own; and where that ehoice is hope) no one gives akner uneasiness withwanting, or where a man is mistaken in his out feeling some share of it.- But I am gone choice, and yet under a necessity of continu- beyond what I designed, and had almost forgot ing in the saine company, it will certainly be what I chiefly proposed : which was, barely his interest to carry himself as easily as pos- to tell you how hardly we, who pass most sible.

lof our time in town, dispense with a long In this I am sensible I do but repeat what vacation in the country, how uneasy we grow has been said a thousand times, at which hew- to ourselves, and to one another, when our ever I think nobody has any title to take ex-conversation is coufined ; insomuch that, by ception, but they who never failed to put this Michaelmas, it is odds but we come to downin practice.-Not to use any longer preface, right squabbling, and make as free with one this being the season of the year in which another to our faces as we do with the rest of great numbers of all sorts of people retire the world bebind their backs. After I have from this place of business and pleasure to told you this, I am to desire that you would country solitude, I think it not improper to now and then give us a lesson of good-humour, adviso them to take with them as great a stock a family-picce, which, since we are all very

fond of you, I hope may have some influence freshness of the evening in my garden, which upon us.

then affords me the pleasantest hours I pass After these plain observations, give me in the whole four and twenty. I immediately leave to give you an hint of what a set of com- rose from my couch, and went down into it. pany of my acquaintance, who are now gone You descend at first by twelve stone steps ininto the country, and have the use of an absent to a large square divided into four grass-plots, nobleman's seat, have settled among them- in each of which is a statue of white marble. selves, to avoid the inconveniences above men- This is separated from a large parterre by a tioned. They are a collection of ten or twelve low wall; and from thence, througb a pair of of the same good inclination towards each iron gates, you are led into a long broad walk, other, but of very different talents and incli- of the finest turf, set on each side with tall nations : from hence they hope that the va- yews, and on either hand bordered by a canal, riety of their tempers will only create variety which on the right divides the walk from a wilof pleasures. But as there always will arise, derness parted into variety of alleys and are among the same people, either for want of di- bours, and on the left from a kind of amphitheversity of objects, or the like causes, a certain atre, which is the receptacle of a great numsatiety, which may grow into ill-humour or ber of oranges and myrtles. The moon shone discontent, there is a large wing of the house bright, and seemed then most agreeably to which they design to employ in the nature of supply the place of the sun, obliging me with an infirmary. Whoever says a peevish thing, as much light as was necessary to discover a or acts any thing which betrays a sourness or thousand pleasing objects, and at the same indisposition to company, is immediately to time divested of all power of heat. The rebe conveyed to his chambers in the infirmary ; fiection of it in the water, the fanning of the from whence he is not to be relieved, till by his wind rustling on the leares, the singing of the maner of submission, and the sentiments ex- thrush and nightingale, and the coolness of pressed in his petition for that purpose, he ap- the walks, all conspired to make me lay aside pears to the majority of the company to be all displeasing thoughts and brought me into again fit for society. You are to understand, such a tranquillity of mind, as is, I believe, that all ill-natured words or uneasy gestures the next happiness to that of hereafter. In are sufficient cause for banishment ; speaking this sweet retirement I naturally fell into the impatiently to servants, making a man re- repetition of some lines out of a poem of Milpeat what he says, or any thing that betrayston's, which he entitles Il Penseroso, the ideas inattention or dishumour, are also criminal of which were exquisitely suited to my present without reprieve. But it is provided, that wanderings of thought. whoever observes the ill-natured fit coming upon himself, and voluntarily retires, shall be

«Sweet bird! that shunu'st the noise of folly.

Most musical! most melancholy ! received at his return from the infirmary with

Thee, chantrese, oft, the woods among the highest marks of esteem. By these and I woo to hear thy ev'ning song: other wholsome methods, it is expected that if And missing thee I walk unseen

On the dry smooth-shaven green, they cannot cure one another, yet at least

To hehold the wand'ring moon, they have taken care that the ill-humour

Riding near her highest noon, of one shall not be troublesome to the rest Like one that hath been led astray, of the company. There are many other rules

Through the heaven's wide pathless way, which the society have established for the

And oft, as if her head she bow'd,

Stooping through a tleecy cloud. preservation of their ease and tranquillity, the effects of which, with the incidents that « Then let some strange mysterious dream arise among them, shall be communicated to

Wave with its wings in airy stream

Of lively portraituro display'd you from time to time, for the public good,

Softly on my eyelids laid: by, Sir,

And as I wake, sweet music breathe
Your most humble servant,

Above, about, or underneath,
T.

R. 0.'

Sent by spirits to nortals' good,

Or the unseen genius of the wood." No 425.] Tuesday, July 8, 1712.

I reflected then upon the sweet vicissitudes

of night and day, on the charming disposition Frigora mitescunt zephyris; ver proterit æst as of the seasons, and their return again in a perIntcritura, simul

petual circle: and oh! said I, that I could "Pomifer autumnus fruges effuderit; et mox Bruma recurrit iners. Hor. Od. vii. Lib. 4. 9. from these my declining years return again to

my first spring of youth and vigour; but that, The cold grows soft with western gales

alas! is impossible: all that remains within The summer over spring prevails, But yields to autumn's fruitful rain,

my power is to soften the inconveniencies T As this to winter storms and bails;

feel; with an easy contented mind, and the enEach loss the hasting moon repairs again.

ljoyment of such delights as this solitude affords Sir W. Temple.

Ime. In this thought I sat me down on a bank MR. SPECTATOR,

of Aowers, and dropt into a slumber, which, * THERE is hardly any thing gives me a whether it were the effect of fumes and vas more sensible delight than the enjoyment of a pours, or my present thoughts, I know not; cool still evening after the uneasiness of a hot but methought the genius of the garden stood sultry day. Such a one I passed not long ago, before me, and introduced into the walk where which made me rejoice when the hour was I lay this drama and different scmues of the come for the sun to set, that I might enjoy the revolution of the year, which, whilst I then

Any dream, I resolved to write dewy, attired in gray; the other was Vesper, ad scad to the Spectator.

in a robe of azure beset with drops of gold, ne first person whom I saw advancing whose breath he caught while it passed over a cowards me was a youth of a most beautiful air a bundle of honeysuckles and tuberoses whicb and shape, though he seemed not yet arrived he held in his hand. Pan and Ceres followed at that exact proportion and symmetry of parts them with four reapers, who danced a morwhich a little more time would have given rice to the sound oaten-pipes and cymbals. him ; but, however, there was such a bloom in Then came the attendant Months. June rehis countenance, such satisfaction and joy, tained still some small likeness of the Spring; that I thought it the most desirable form that but the other two seemed to step with a less I had ever seen. He was clothed in a flowing vigorous tread, especially August, who seemmantle of green silk, interwoven with flowers; ed almost to faint, whilst, for half the steps he he had a chaplet of roses on his head, and a took, the dog-star levelled his rays full at his narcissus in his hand ; primroses and violets head. They passed on, and made way for a sprang up under his feet, and all nature was person that seemed to bend a little under the cheered at his approach. Flora was on one weight of years ; his beard and hair, which hand, and Vertumnus on the other, in a robe were full grown, were composed of an equal of changeable silk. After this I was surprised number of black and gray; he wore a robe to see the moon-beams reflected with a sudden which lie had girt round him, of a yellowisb glare from armour, and to see a man com cast, not unlike the colour of fallen leaves, pletely armed, advancing with his sword which he walked upon. I thought he hardly drawn. I was soon informed by the genius it made amends for expelling the forgoing scene was Mars, who had long usurped a place by the large quantity of fruits which he bore in among the attendants of the Spring. He his hands. Plenty walked by his side with a made way for a softer appearance. It was healthy fresh countenance, pouring out from a Venns, without any ornament but her own horn all the various products of the year. beauties, not so much as her own cestus, with Pomona followed with a glass of cider in her which she had encompassed a globe, which hand, with Bacchus in a chariot drawn by she held in her right hand, and in her left tigers, accompanied by a whole troop of sahand she had a sceptre of gold. After her fol-tyrs, fauns, and sylvans. September, who Jowed the Graces, with arms entwined within came next seemed in his looks to promise a one anothicr; their girdles were loosed, and oew Spring, and wore the livery of those they moved to the sound of soft music, strik. months. The succeeding month was all soiled ing the ground alternately with their feet. with the juice of grapes, as be had just come Then came up the three Months which belong from the wine-press. November, though he to this season. As March advanced towards was in his division, yet, by the many stops me, there was, methought in his look a lower- he made, seemed rather inclined to the Wining roughness, which ill be-fitted a month ter which followed close at his heels. He which was ranked in so soft a season ; but as advanced in the shape of an old man in the he came forwards, his features became inscn- extremity of age; the hair he bad was so very sibly more mild and gentle ; he smoothed his white, it seemed a real snow ; his eyes were brow, and looked with so sweet a countenance, red and piercing, and his beard bung with tbat I could not but lament his departure, Igreat quantity of icicles ; he was wrapt up in though he made way for April. He appeared furs, yet so pinched with excess of cold, that in the greatest gaiety imaginable, and had a his limbs were all contracted, and his body thousand pleasures to attend him ; his look bent to the ground, so that he could not have vas frequently clouded, but immediately re- supported himself had it not been for Comus, turned to its first composure, and remained the god of revels, and Necessity, the mofixed in a smile. Then came May, attended ther of Fate, who sustained him on each by Cupid, with his bow strong, and in a pos- side. The shape and mantle of Comus was ture to let fly an arrow: as he passed hy, me- one of the things that most surprised me : as thought I heard a confused noise of soft com he advanced towards me, his countenance plaints, gentle ecstacies, and tender sighs of seemed the most desirable I had ever seen. On lovers ; vows of constancy, and as many com- the fore part of his mantle was pictured joy, plainings of perfidiousness; all which the delight, and satisfaction, with a thousand emwinds wasted away as soon as they had reach-blems of merriment, and jests with faces lookPd my hearing. After these I saw a man ad-ing two ways at once; but as he passed from vance in the full prime and vigour of his age; me I was amazed at a shape so little correshis complexion was sanguine and ruddy, hispondent to his face : his head was bald, and hair black, and fell down in beautiful ringlets all the rest of his limbs appeared old and debeneath his shoulders; a mantle of hair-co-formed. On the binder part of his mantle Toured silk hung loosely upon him : he advanc-was represented Murder* with dishevelled hair ed with a basty step after the Spring, and and a dagger all bloody, Anger in a robe of sought out the shade and cool fountains which scarlet, and Suspicion squinting with both eyes; played in the garden. He was particularly but above all, the most conspicuous was the well pleased when a troop of Zephyrs fan-battle of Laipthæ and the Centaurs. I dened him with their wings. He had two companions, who walked on each side, that made him appear the most agreeable ; the one + The English are branded, perhaps unjustly, with was Aurora with fingers of roses, and her feet benig addicted to suicide about this time of the year.

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