Why did I see them? had I still remain'd Deprived of all, yet feeling no desires, Whence then, I cry, the pangs that I sustain ? Dubious and uninform'd, my soul inquires, Ought she to cherish, or shake off her pain. Suff'ring, I suffer not-sincerely love, Yet feel no touch of that enliv'ning flame; As chance inclines me, unconcern'd I move, All times, and all events, to me the same. I search my heart, and not a wish is there, A sea of doubts, and self the source of all. I ask not life, nor do I wish to die ; And, if thine hand accomplish not my cure, I groan in chains, yet want not a release: Am just as void of purpose, as of peace; Have neither pain, nor fear, nor hope, nor heart. My claim to life, though sought with earnest care, My soul is a forgotten thing; she sinks, Sinks and is lost, without a wish to rise; Feels an indiff'rence she abhors, and thinks Her name erased for ever from the skies. Language affords not my distress a name,-- When Love departs, a chaos wide and vast, When Love returns, the gloomy scene is past, Then tell me, why these ages of delay? Oh Love, all-excellent, once more appear; Disperse the shades, and snatch me into day, From this abyss of night, these floods of fear! No Love is angry, will not now endure A sigh of mine, or suffer a complaint; He smites me, wounds me, and withholds the cure! Exhausts my pow'rs, and leaves me sick and faint. He wounds, and hides the hand that gave the blow; Yet I adore thee, though it seem in vain. And wilt thou leave me, whom, when lost and blind; Thou didst distinguish, and vouchsafe to choose, Before thy laws were written in my mind, While yet the world had all my thoughts and views? Now leave me? when, enamour'd of thy laws, What can have caused the change which I deplore! To draw, and place its picture in thy view. 'Tis thine without reserve, most simply thine : So given to thee, that it is not my own; A willing captive of thy grace divine; And loves, and seeks thee, for thyself alone. Pain cannot move it, danger cannot scare; Pleasure and wealth, in its esteem, are dust; It loves thee e'en when least inclined to spare Its tend'rest feelings, and avows thee just. 'Tis all thine own; my spirit is so tog, Love, holy Love! and art thou not se ere, From all self-bias, gen'rous and unmix'd. But I am silent, seeing what I see And fear, with cause, that I am self-deceived: Live thou, and reign, for ever, glorious Lord! Slay me, my God, and I applaud the blow. WATCHING UNTO GOD IN THE NIGHT SEASON Sleep at last has fled these eyes, More alert my spirits rise, And my heart is free and light. Nature silent all around, Not a single witness near; God as soon as sought is found; And the flame of love burns clear. Interruption, all day long, Checks the current of my joys; Undisturb'd I muse all night, Life with its perpetual stir, Proves a foe to Love and me Fresh entanglements occur- Comes the night, and sets me free Never more, sweet sleep, suspena Hush the world that I may wake God, the partner of my night! David, for the self-same cause, Sleep, self-lovers, is for you- ON THE SAME. Season of my purest pleasure, Find, in watching, my repose. Silence all around prevailing, Nature hush'd in slumber sweet, No rude noise mine ears assailing, Now my God and I can meet: Universal nature slumbers, And my soul partakes the calm, Breathes her ardour out in numbers, Plaintive song or lofty psalm. Now my passion, pure and holy, Is an evil match'd by none. Worldly prate and babble hurt me; Neither teach me nor divert me; Simple souls and unpolluted, 'Tis the secret fear of sinning Checks my tongue, or I should say, When I see the night beginning, I am glad of parting day; Love, this gentle admonition Whispers soft within my breast? "Choice befits not thy condition. 66 Acquiescence suits thee best." Henceforth, the repose and pleasure Wishing is but inclination Quarrelling with thy decrees; Wayward nature finds th' occasion'Tis her folly and disease. Night, with its sublime enjoyments, |