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sician and the patient join, then down goes the disease; for the patient recovers. If the physician and the disease join, then down goes the patient; that is where the physician mistakes the cure.1 If the patient and the disease join, then down goes the physician; for he is discredited.

265. (185.) Alexander visited Diogenes in his tub. And when he asked him; What he would desire of him? Diogenes answered; That you would stand a little aside, that the sun may

come to me.

† 266. Diogenes said of a young man that danced daintily, and was much commended; The better, the worse.

267. (236.) Diogenes called an ill musician, Cock. Why? (saith he.) Diogenes answered; Because when you crow men use to rise.

268. (188.) Heraclitus the Obscure said; The dry light was the best soul. Meaning, when the faculties intellectual are in vigour, not wet, nor 2, as it were, blooded by the affections.

†269. There was in Oxford a cowardly fellow that was a very good archer. He was abused grossly by another, and moaned himself to Walter Ralegh, then a scholar, and asked his advice; What he should do to repair the wrong had been offered him? Ralegh answered; Why, challenge him at a match of shooting.

270. (100.) Whitehead, a grave divine, was much esteemed by Queen Elizabeth, but not preferred, because he was against the government of Bishops. He was of a blunt stoical nature.3 He came one day to the Queen, and the Queen happened to say to him; I like thee the better, Whitehead, because thou livest unmarried. He answered again; In troth, Madam, I like you the worse for the same cause.

† 271. There was a nobleman that was lean of visage, but immediately after his marriage he grew pretty plump and fat. One said to him, Your lordship doth contrary to other married men; for they at the first wax lean, and you wax fat. Sir Walter Ralegh stood by and said; Why, there is no beast, that if you take him from the common and put him into the several, but he will wax fat.

†272. Diogenes seeing one that was a bastard casting

'If the physician and the disease join, that is a strong disease; and the physician mistaking the cure, then, &c. R. 8 This sentence is omitted in R.

2 not drenched, or. R.

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stones among the people, bade him Take heed he hit not his father.

273. (97.) Dr. Laud' said; That some hypocrites and seeming mortified men, that held down their heads, were like little images that they place in the very bowing of the vaults of churches, that look as if they held up the church, but are but puppets.2

274. (104.) It was said among some of the grave prelates of the Council of Trent, in which the school-divines bore the sway; That the school-men were like the astronomers; who to save the phenomena, framed to their conceit eccentrics and epicycles, and a wonderful engine of orbs, though no such things were so they, to save the practice of the church, had devised a number of strange positions.

† 275. It was also said by many, concerning the canons of that council; That we are beholding to Aristotle for many articles of our faith.

276. (35.) The Lo. Henry Howard, being Lord Privy Seal, was asked by the King openly at the table, (where commonly he entertained the King,) upon the sudden3; My lord, have you not a desire to see Rome? My lord Privy Seal answered, Yes, indeed, Sir. The King said, And why? My lord answered, Because, and it please your Majesty, it was once the seat of the greatest monarchy, and the seminary of the bravest men in the world, amongst the heathen: and then again1, because after it was the see of so many holy Bishops in the primitive church, most of them martyrs. The King would not give it over, but said; And for nothing else? My lord answered; Yes, and it please your Majesty, for two things especially.5 The one, to see him, who they say hath such a power to forgive other men's sins, to confess his own sins upon his knees before a chaplain or priest; and the other is, to hear Antichrist say his creed.

277. (235.) There was a nobleman said of a great counsellor; That he would have made the worst farrier in the world, for he never shod horse but he cloyed him: so he never commended any man to the King for service, or upon occasion of suit, or otherwise,

The Lord Archbishop Laud. R.

2 were like the little images in the vaults or roofs of churches, which look and bow down as if they held up the church, when as they bear no weight at all. R.

The same Earl of Northampton, then Lord Privy Seal, was asked by King James openly at the table, where commonly he entertained the King with discourse; the King asked him upon the sudden, R.

4 secondly. R.

5 for two things more. R.

but that he would come in in the end with a But, and drive in a nail to his disadvantage.

† 278. There was a lady of the west country, that gave great entertainment at her house to most of the gallant gentlemen thereabout; and amongst others, Sir Walter Ralegh was one. This lady, though otherwise a stately dame, was a notable good housewife; and in the morning betimes she called to one of her maids that looked to the swine, and asked; Is the piggy served? Sir Walter Ralegh's chamber was fast by the lady's, so as he heard her. A little before dinner, the lady came down in great state into the great chamber, which was full of gentlemen: And as soon as Sir Walter Ralegh set eye upon her; Madam, (saith he) is the piggy serv'd? The lady answered, You know best whether you have had your breakfast.


279. (237.) There was a gentleman fell very sick, and a friend of his said to him; Surely, you are in danger; I pray send for a physician. But the sick man answered; It is no matter, for if I die, I will die at leisure.

280. (193.) There was an Epicurean vaunted, that divers of other sects of philosophers did after turn Epicureans, but there was never any Epicurean that turned to any other sect. Whereupon a philosopher that was of another sect, said; The reason was plain, for that cocks may be made capons, but capons could never be made cocks.

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3. His Majesty James the First, King of Great Britain, having made unto his Parliament an excellent and large declaration, concluded thus: I have now given you a clear mirror of my mind; use it therefore like a mirror; and take heed how you let it fall, or how you soil it with your breath.

5. His Majesty said to his Parliament at another time, finding there were some causeless jealousies sown amongst them; That the King and his people, (whereof the Parliament is the representative body,) were as husband and wife; and therefore that of all other things jealousy was between them most pernicious.

6. His Majesty, when he thought his counsel mought note in him some variety in businesses, though indeed he remained constant, would say; That the sun many times shineth watery ; but it is not the sun which causeth it, but some cloud rising betwixt us and the sun: and when that is scattered, the sun is as it was, and comes to his former brightness.

7. His Majesty, in his answer to the book of the Cardinal of Evereux, (who had in a grave argument of divinity sprinkled many witty ornaments of poesy and humanity) saith; That these flowers were like blue and yellow and red flowers in the corn, which make a pleasant shew to those that look on, but they hurt the corn.

8. Sir Edward Cook, being vehement against the two Provincial Councils, of Wales and the North, said to the King; There was nothing there but a kind of confusion and hotch-potch of justice: one while they were a Star-Chamber; another while a Kings-bench; another, a Common-place; another, a Commission of Oyer and Terminer. His Majesty answered; Why, Sir Edward Cook, they be like houses in progress, where I have not, nor can

Sce Preface, pp. 114. 118.

have, such distinct rooms of state, as I have here at Whitehall, or at Hampton-court.

9. The Commissioners of the Treasure moved the King, for the relief of his estate, to disafforest some forests of his; explaining themselves of such forests as lay out of the way, not near any of the King's houses, nor in the course of his progress; whereof he should never have use nor pleasure. Why, (saith the King) do you think that Salomon had use and pleasure of all his three hundred concubines ?

10. His Majesty, when the committees of both Houses of Parliament presented unto him the instrument of Union of England and Scotland, was merry with them; and amongst other pleasant speeches, shewed unto them the laird of Lawreston, a Scotchman, who was the tallest and greatest man that was to be seen; and said; Well, now we are all one, yet none of you will say, but here is one Scotchman greater than any Englishman; which was an ambiguous speech; but it was thought he meant it of himself.

11. His Majesty would say to the lords of his counsel, when they sat upon any great matter, and came from counsel in to him; Well, you have sit, but what have you hatched?

13. Queen Elizabeth was importuned much by my Lord of Essex, to supply divers great offices that had been long void; the Queen answered nothing, to the matter; but rose up on the sudden, and said; I am sure my office will not be long void. And yet at that time there was much speech of troubles and divisions about the crown, to be after her decease; but they all vanished; and King James came in, in a profound peace.

17. King Henry the fourth of France was so punctual of his word, after it was once passed, that they called him The King of the Faith.1

18. The said King Henry the fourth was moved by his Parliament to a war against the Protestants: he answered; Yes, I mean it; I will make every one of you captains; you shall have companies assigned you. The Parliament observing whereunto his speech tended, gave over, and deserted the motion.2

21. A great officer at court, when my Lord of Essex was first in trouble; and that he and those that dealt for him would talk much of my Lord's friends and of his enemies; answered to

Lamb. MS. p. 18. (see above, p.119.)

2 Id. ibid. (without the last sentence)

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