a Club of the Perfons whofe Converfations I have defcribed, who for their own private, as alfo the publick • Emolument, fhould exclude, and be excluded all other Society. Their Attire should be the fame, with their Huntsmens, and none should be admitted into this green • Converfation-Piece, except he had broke his Collar. ⚫ bone thrice. A broken Rib or two might also admit a Man without the leaft Oppofition. The Prefident must ' neceffarily have broken his Neck, and have been ta'ken up dead once or twice: For the more Maims this "Brotherhood fhould have met with, the eafier will their Converfation flow and keep up; and when any one of ⚫ these vigorous Invalids had finished his Narration of the Collar-bone, this naturally would introduce the Hiftory of the Ribs. Befides, the different Circum⚫ftances of their Falls and Fractures would help to pro- long and diverfify their Relations. There fhould alfo be another Club of fuch Men, who have not fuc⚫ceeded fo well in maiming themfelves, but are how"ever in the conftant Pursuit of these Accomplishments. "I would by no Méans be fufpected by what I have said to traduce in general the Body of Fox-hunters; for "whilst I look upon a reasonable Creature full fpeed after a Pack of Dogs, by way of Pleasure, and not of ⚫ Bufinefs, I fhall always make honourable Mention of it.

Bur the most irkfome Converfation of all others I ⚫ have met with in the Neighbourhood, has been among two or three of your Travellers, who have overlooked "Men and Manners, and have paffed thro' France and "Italy with the fame Obfervation that the Carriers and Stage-Coachmen do through Great-Britain; that is, their Stops and Stages have been regulated according to the Liquor they have met with in their Paffage. They ⚫ indeed remember the Names of abundance of Places, 'with the particular Fineries of certain Churches: But 'their distinguishing Mark is certain Prettinesses of Foreign Languages, the Meaning of which they could have 'better exprefs'd in their own. The Entertainment of ⚫ these fine Observers, Shakespear has described to confift

• In talking of the Alps and Appennines, The Pyrenean, and the River Po.

And

I WOULD not be thought in all this to hate fuch honeft Creatures as Dogs; I am only unhappy that I cannot partake in their Diverfions. But I love them fo well, as Dogs, that I often go with my Pockets ftuffed ⚫with Bread to dispense my Favours, or make my Way through them at Neighbours Houses. There is in parti⚫cular a young Hound of great Expectation, Vivacity, ⚫ and Enterprize, that attends my Flights where-ever he fpies me. This creature obferves my Countenance, and ⚫ behaves himself accordingly. His Mirth, his Frolick, ⚫ and Joy upon the Sight of me has been observed, and I have been gravely defired not to encourage him fo much, for it fpoils his Parts; but I think he fhews them sufficiently in the several Boundings, Friskings, and Scourings, when he makes his Court to me: But I foresee in a little Time he and I must keep Company with one another only, for we are fit for no other in these • Parts. Having inform'd you how I do país my Time in the Country where I am, I muft proceed to tell you ' how I would pass it, had I fuch a Fortune as would put me above the Obfervance of Ceremony and Custom.

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My Scheme of a Country Life then should be as follows. As I am happy in three or four very agreeable Friends, these I would conftantly have with me; and the Freedom we took with one another at School and the • University we would maintain and exert upon all Occafions with great Courage: There fhould be certain Hours of the Day to be imployed in Reading, during ⚫ which Time it fhould be impoffible for any one of us to enter the other's Chamber, unless by Storm. After this we would communicate the Trash or Treasure we had met with, with our own Reflections upon the Matter, the Juftness of which we would controvert with good'humour'd Warmth, and never spare one another out of that complaifant Spirit of Converfation, which makes others affirm and deny the fame Matter in a quarter of an Hour. If any of the neighbouring Gentlemen, not of our Turn, should take it in their Heads to vifit me, I should look upon these Persons in the fame De

⚫ gree

<

6

gree Enemies to my particular State of Happiness, as ever the French were to that of the Publick, and I would ⚫ be at an annual Expence in Spies to obferve their Motions. Whenever I fhould be furprized with a Vifit, as I hate Drinking, I would be brisk in fwelling Bum" pers, upon this Maxim, That it is better to trouble others with my Impertinence, than to be troubled my felf with theirs. The Neceffity of an Infirmary makes ⚫ me refolve to fall into that Project; and as we should be ⚫ but five,the Terrors of an involuntary Separation, which ⚫ our Number cannot fo well admit of, would make us ex'ert our felves, in oppofition to all the Particulars mentioned in your Inftitution of that equitable Confinement. This my Way of Life I know would fubject me to the • Imputation of a morofe, covetous and fingular Fellow. Thefe and all other hard Words, with all manner of infipid Jefts, and all other Reproach, would be Matter of Mirth to me and my Friends: Befides, I would ⚫ destroy the Application of the Epithets Morofe and Covetous, by a yearly Relief of my undefervedly necef'fitous Neighbours, and by treating my Friends and Do'mefticks with an Humanity that should exprefs the Obligation, to lie rather on my Side; and as for the Word 'fingular, I was always of Opinion every Man muft be fo, to be what one would defire him.

Mr. SPECTATOR,

Your very bumble Servant.

J. R.

ABOUT two years ago I was called upon by the

younger Part of a Country Family, by my Mother's Side related to me, to vifit Mr. Campbell, the ⚫ dumb Man; for they told me that that was chiefly what brought them to Town, having heard Wonders of him in Effex. I, who always wanted Faith in Matters of ⚫ that Kind, was not eafily prevailed on to go; but left they should take it ill, I went with them; when to iny Surprize, Mr. Campbell related all their paft Life, (in 'fhort had he not been prevented, fuch a Difcovery 'would have come out, as would have ruined the rext Defign of their coming to Town, viz. buying Wedding

Cloaths.)

Cloaths.) Our Names though he never heard of us before and we endeavoured to conceal

were as familiar to him as ourfelves. To be fure Mr. SPEC"TATOR, he is a very learned and wife Man. Being, impatient to know my Fortune, having paid my Refpects in a Family-Jacobus, he told me (after his man--ner) among feveral other Things, that in a Year and "nine Months I fhould fall ill of a new Fever, be given: over by my Phyficians, but fhould with much Difficulty recover: That the first Time I took the Air afterwards, I fhould be addrefs'd to by a young Gentle-man of a plentiful Fortune, good Senfe, and a gene-rous Spirit. Mr. SPECTATOR, he is the pureft Man in the World, for all he faid is come to pass, and I am the happiest she in Kent. I have been in queft of Mr. Campbell these three Months, and cannot find him out. Now hearing you are a dumb Man too, I thought you: might correfpond, and be able to tell me fomething; for I think my felf highly oblig'd to make his Fortune, as he has mine. 'Tis very poffible your Worship, who has Spies all over this Town, can inform me how to fend to him: If you can, I beseech you, be as speedy as poffible, and you will highly oblige:

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Your conftant Reader and Admirer,›

Dulcibella Thankley.

ORDERED, that the Infpector I employ about Wonders, enquire at the Golden-Lion, oppofite to the Half-Moon Tavern in Drury-Lane, into the Merit of this filent Sage, and report accordingly,

T

9

Thursday,

No.475. Thursday, September 4.

Quæ res in fe neque confilium neque modum Habet ullum, eam confilio regere non potes.

I

Ter..

T is an old Obfervation, which has been made of Poli-ticians who would rather ingratiate themselves with their Sovereign, than promote his real Service, that they accommodate their Counfels to his Inclinations, and. advise him to fuch Actions only as his Heart is naturally fet upon. The Privy-Counsellor of one in Love muft ob-ferve the fame Conduct, unless he would forfeit the Friend-fhip of the Perfon who defires his Advice. I have known feveral odd Cafes of this Nature. Hipparchus was going to marry a common Woman, but being refolved to do no-thing without the Advice of his Friend Philander, he confulted him upon the Occafion. Philander told him his Mind freely, and reprefented his Mistress to him in fuch ftrong Colours, that the next Morning he received a Challenge for his pains, and before twelve a Clock was run through the Body by the Man who had asked his Advice. Celia was more prudent on the like Occafion; fhe defired Leonilla to give her Opinion freely upon a young Fellow who made his Addreffes to her. Leonilla, to oblige her, told her with great Frankness, that she looked upon him as one of the most worthlefs-Celia, foreseeing what a Character fhe was to expect, begged her not to go on, for that she had been privately married to him above a Fortnight. The Truth of it is, a Woman feldom asks Ad.. vice before she has bought her Wedding-Cloaths. When fhe has made her own Choice, for Form's Sake she sends a Conge d'elire to her Friends.

IF we look into the fecret Springs, and Motives that fet People at work on thefe Occafions, and put them upon asking Advice, which they never intend to take; I look upon it to be none of the leaft, that they are incapable of keeping a Secret which is fo very pleafing to them. A Girl

longs