God the favour of success; as he had been pleased to punish me for my past folly, and had brought me to believe that I had highly offended him, I went under a hedge, and put up a solemn prayer to him, to give me success in my journey, and make me an object of his care for the future: and I cut a stick half through, and bent it down in the hedge, which I promised to look at, on my return, and render praise to God, if he granted me this favour. Somewhat like poor Jacob, in his trouble, when he anointed the pillar, by pouring a little oil upon the top of it; and promising, if God would keep him, then he should be his God; and, of all that God should give him, he would give God the tenth part. God heard my prayer, and I got the place. Though there was a servant in the parlour with the gentleman, and though they had partly agreed when I came in; yet he broke off the bargain with him, to my astonishment. The reason why he chose me in preference to the other was, because he was a married man and I was not. This was the secondary cause; but I resolve it by the primary one. At my return I looked, with many tears, at the stick which I had marked, and offered up an imperfect tribute of praise to the God of my daily mercies, whom I had neglected and much offended.

For some time I endeavoured, while in place, to walk so as to please God, as I imagined; but, alas! the vanities of this world are too strong for any but those who are kept by the mighty power

of God, through faith unto salvation: which power I knew nothing of; therefore my resolutions were soon broken, and I forgot my God. But soon after this he again put his afflicting hand on me, and laid me on a sick bed for many months; nor did I recover effectually for three years after. But still distress of mind, at times, followed me; and, blessed be God, he did not wholly leave me without some convictions, till he brought me to know the truth as it is in Jesus. One particular instance of Providence I here recollect also; which was, I had ordered my box of clothes to be left at the Star-inn at Maidstone, in Kent, for the Cranbrook carrier to bring to me; but he said it was not there. So I went to search after it, fearing it was lost. At this time I was so poor in pocket, that I had but one shilling left in all the world. However, I thought I should be able to go out and return again in one day, therefore that shilling would bear my charges; but, when I came to Maidstone, the box was not there; I was obliged to go further; and, in my return, I found myself so very weak and low that I could not get back that day. The shilling was gone, my strength was gone, and the weather was very wet and cold; night, too, began to draw on apace, and at this time I was two miles from Maidstone, which was fourteen from Cranbrook. While I was thinking of, and mourning over, my miserable situation, I thought, if I were one that feared and loved God, as others in old time had done, I might have any thing at

his hands; but as for me, I had made him my enemy by sin, and therefore he would take no notice of me, nor of any body else in our days, for parsons and people were all wicked alike. Presently after this it came suddenly on my mind to go out of the foot-path, which led through the fields, to go into the horse-road; though, at the same time, the foot-path was by far the best. I had been in the road scarcely a minute before I cast my eye on the ground, and there lay a sixpence. I took it up; before I had walked many steps farther, there lay a shilling also. I took that up, and it supplied my necessities at that time very well. These manifold providences, and answers to prayer, did, at times, deeply impress my mind that God had some regard for me: but when sin was committed, all these thoughts were blasted.

However, I never could entirely, after this time, get rid of all my thoughts about the awful day of judgment; the dreadful consideration of an endless eternity; the tremendous tribunal of God; the woful state of a guilty sinner before him; the certain conquest of triumphant death and certain approach to God's bar; the wretched figure that a guilty soul would make when all his secret and open sins were exposed to God, angels, and men; and the miserable punishment which souls must feel who have their doom fixed in the gloomy receptacle of the damned. These things were, at times, uppermost in my thoughts; and, though I pursued many pleasures, in order to stifle them,

yet I had felt enough to fix a lasting conviction of the truth of them upon my soul.

Having wandered about for some years in this solitary way, seeking rest and finding none, it happened that I once went to work at Darnbury Park, in Essex, for one 'Squire Fitch. I had been there but a few days before I fell sick, and was carried to the sign of the Bell, where nobody knew me, and with only two shillings in my pocket; but Providence sent an old widow, whose name was Shepherd, and whose deceased husband had been a butcher. This woman being much of a doctress, doctored me, nursed me, watched with me, and fed me, though she never saw me before or since; nor had she any thing for her trouble, and yet took as much care of me as if I had been her own child. A few years ago I was determined to go down and see her, and restore her fourfold for her labour, and tell her what God had done for me; but, upon inquiry, I found that she had been dead about three months before my arrival, which I was very sorry for.

I do not remember any other particular providence until I was married, when my wife and I took ready furnished lodgings at Mortlake, in Surry, where God smote my conscience effectually, It so happened that I fell lame, having received a wrench in my loins, which rendered me incapable of labour for many days. During this time our money was all gone, and we were but strangers in the place, having been in it but about half a year.

After I began to recover a little, there fell a deep snow on the ground, which prevented my working for many days. Here Providence suffered us to know what it was to want. We had one child, about five or six months old, which was our firstborn. It happened one morning early that my wife asked me for the tinder-box, seemingly in a great fright, crying out, I wonder the poor child has not waked all night.' She lighted the candle and took up the child; and behold it was dead, and as black as a coal! It went off in a convulsive fit, as five more have done since, all of whom turned black also. Here Providence appeared again; for, about three or four months before this death happened, a gentleman, in whose garden I at times had wrought, desired me to look after his horse in the country while he was in town, for which I was to have one shilling per week.. The very day on which the child died the gentleman came down from London; and I got my money of him for looking after the horse, which just served to bury the poor infant. My lameness, poverty, distress of mind, the sufferings of my wife, loss of my child, and the sense of God's wrath, were the most complicated distresses I had ever felt. From this time. spiritual convictions began to plough so deep in my heart as to make way for the word of eternal life; which at length brought me experimentally to know the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom he hath sent. And, if God should spare my life, and give me time, I may acquaint the world of the